my activities

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We’re Selling Rabbit Fur Coats, Cheap!

For the last 18 years, my wife has organized a street BBQ with our neighbours. I’d like to say that it’s Lily and I who put this on, but I don’t do much more than clean off a few chairs and roll our BBQ out to the street. She does all the organizing.

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What happens is at 5 pm, I roll our BBQ out to the middle of the street (we live on a keyhole cul-de-sac) and, magically, the neighbours start to show up with their chairs, food and drinks.

It’s not a big event; there’s just ten houses on our street. But we do invite past neighbours (alumni) to attend.

We’ve had the police drive by a few times, but they’ve always just joked with us. Maybe it’s because we have a retired corrections officer on the street, and maybe they have a secret signal (like the Masons) that tips other officers to their occupation. Maybe not.

This year a conversation started about the rabbits. You know, those cute little fury things some people keep as pets. Not on our street! Everyone hates them – even the women, especially the women!

It seemed to be unanimous that everyone was looking for ways to keep the bunnies from eating the flowers in our gardens. Some have tried human hair, moth balls, soap, and cayenne pepper. One owner said she put Frank’s Hot Sauce in the garden, but I don’t think that’s right, wasting good hot sauce on those varmints.

One neighbour has put chicken wire around all his little gardens. Sure he has his flowers, but it’s harder to see them through the chicken wire. One guy sits on his deck with a garden hose in hand and spays the little hoppers when he sees them.

As we were talking, we looked over at our house and there was a bunny hopping up our front walk to our door, like he was going to call on our turtle, Winston, to come out for a race or something.

These rabbits are not afraid of us, either. They just look at us with those innocent eyes, and remain very still like they are thinking, “I can see them, but if I remain still they won’t even know I’m hear nibbling on their lilies.”

At the BBQ, there was talk of pellet guns, and setting up a camouflage blind in one of our backyards to hunt them down, but we never got too far with that. We talked of rabbit stew and selling rabbit coats but these ideas didn’t get off the ground either.

In the end, it was still every household for themselves against the rabbit population on our street which is rapidly growing among an aging human demographic.

It was fitting that, as my neighbour and I were returning some things to our backyard, a little bunny, no more than a week or two old, appeared in front of us and then scurried under our deck. I really do think they have plans to overrun us.

Here’s the thing: It’s amazing how we can come together over something as silly as a bunny problem. God wants us to come together around Him, which should be easy. Sadly, in the end, we often end up everyone for themselves. It just should not be.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: How would you deal with a bunny problem? Leave your comment below.

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He Shoots, He Scores!

“Hello Canada, and hockey fans in the United States” … that’s the way Foster Hewitt would start the radio broadcasts of Hockey Night in Canada when I was a kid. We used to beetle out after church Sunday nights, grab the car keys from my dad and sit in our freezing car listening to the hockey game on the radio.

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That’s what you had to do to keep up with your team. But that was then. Now, staying on top of what your team is doing is a whole new ball game.

I just got something that takes all the effort out of tracking your team’s goals and it came just in time for the end of the playoffs. My wife and kids bought me a Budweiser red light for my birthday. For those who don’t know what that is, let me tell you about it.

In hockey arenas, at each end behind the nets and the boards, is a red light that turns on when a goal is scored. Along with the light, in most arenas, a horn also goes off to announce a goal.

Well that’s what my family got me. And if you’re thinking it’s just a nice souvenir, let me tell you, this puppy is a working, fully functioning red light. It’s connected to the internet and when my team scores a goal, the light and the horn (sounding like a fog horn) go off.

Lily was testing it out and turned down the volume of the horn. I just looked at her, and shook my head. That was all she needed to realize the volume on MY light only has one setting and that will be on max. And it was right about then she realized, she may have made a mistake in getting it for me.

The beauty about this red light is you can choose which team or teams you want it to work for. And yes, that’s right, you can choose all 30 teams if you want.

I can just picture myself settling into bed on a Saturday night, and having the horn and light go off because the Vancouver Canucks scored a goal on the west coast. That would be awesome (but I’m not choosing them).

I was pretty excited to try it out and, since it was near the end of the playoffs, I didn’t have many games left. So I selected both teams in the running – Boston and Chicago – just to make sure it would go off during the game. In the three previous games of the series, the two teams had scored a combined total of 12 goals.

I was hoping for a couple of goals to see it work. But what happened made my day. It was beyond my wildest dreams! Chicago and Boston combined for 11 goals in game 4; my red light was working like a Trojan! … And I loved it every time it went off.

Here’s the thing: The amazing thing about God is that He wants to hear from us. In fact, I would say He is excited when we speak to Him. We call it prayer, and it happens all the time, all over the world. And like when my light lights up and it brings a smile to my face, when we start to talk to God, He can’t help but be pleased. Keep talking to Him; it brings Him praise.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What brings a smile to your face every time? Leave your comment below.

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I Never Thought I’d Like This

I find it interesting that you can trick yourself into liking something you don’t really like – in this case, something you don’t usually like doing. Recently, I bought a new weed trimmer.

This garden tool goes by several names, “weed-whacker”, “weed-eater”, “whipper-snipper”, and I’m sure there are a few more.

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Regardless of the name, they don’t really have anything to do with weeds. They are designed to trim the long strands of grass that grow along the edge of your lawn that your lawn mower can’t get.

Now, I don’t really like yard work. I cut the grass when it needs it, but while I’m cutting the front lawn, I keep looking at the basketball hoop in my driveway thinking, “It’d be nice to take some shots right now.” Funny thing is, it’s the only time I have that urge. When I’m done cutting the lawn I no longer have the desire to make a few hoops.

I can think of a million things I could be doing when I have to do yard work, and none of them include taking care of or maintaining anything growing around my property.

So it really surprised me the other day when I got my new cordless … we’ll call it “grass trimmer”, and was anxious to get out there and start using it. The really amazing thing was that not once did I have the urge to put it down and pick up a basketball.

My new trimmer is fantastic! I can push two buttons in and turn the bottom part so it can be used as a edger. I have never edged anything in my life so it came as a real revelation that edging really makes your lawn look good.

When I was all finished I went in the house and looked out the window at how stunning my walkway looked leading up to our front door.

I used my knew toy . . . err . . . a . . . I mean, tool to trim both front and back yards and the battery didn’t die before I was done. It normally takes me about 25 to 30 minutes to cut my lawn, front and back. And usually I can’t wait to get back to doing pretty much anything else.

I even got out my leaf blower afterwards to blow away the grass that blew onto the cement walk and the driveway just so that it looked neat and showed off my trim work.

The only thing that I am concerned about is how long my new found infatuation will last.  This baby is new but how will I feel about using it when it’s another week old or in three months?

By the end of the summer will I be wishing the battery isn’t charged so I don’t have to get out there and trim? Will I be looking longingly over at my basketball hoop and accidentally cut the tops off my wife’s flowers?  I don’t know.

But I do know that my wife, Lily is happy right now and I’m liking the look of my lawn.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes a fresh look at something can give us new inspiration or cause us to find new meaning. Whether it’s a familiar Bible passage, or an old problem, or whether it is God Himself, take a fresh approach and you might be surprised to find something you really like.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you found a new enjoyment or appreciation for? Leave your question below.

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He Wouldn’t Stay on the Cart Path

You don’t usually receive much bruising from playing golf … “maybe get a blister on your little finger, maybe get a blister on your thumb”, as Mark Knopfler of Dire Staits might say.

But this past week, I was golfing with my son and I found out that golf can be a contact sport after all. I don’t normally use a golf cart but we were in a tournament and carts were provided.

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I arrived late, and my son, Mike, already had his golf bag on the cart behind the driver’s seat … I was relegated to being a crash test dummy in the seat beside him! At first I thought nothing of it – though his starts were a little fast, he was getting us to where we needed to go.

After a few holes, however, it started to rain and got a little chilly which, for some reason, impacted his driving quality. It may have been the rain drops on the windscreen that made the terrain difficult to see, or maybe it was that he was cold and didn’t have his hand fully on the steering wheel, but let’s just say the ride got a little rough for the last 14 holes.

About 12 years ago, he was driving a golf cart with my dad as the passenger and at one point Mike almost threw his grandfather out of the cart! The words “Wow, wow, wow, Mikey boy!” are etched in my memory as I watched my dad hang on for dear life while Mike had the cart on two wheels.

We even had a deja-vu moment the other day when Mike said “ Hey, that was like the time I almost tossed Grandpa out of the cart.” Obviously, it was a memory that has stuck with Mike too … not that it has impacted his driving habits over the years.

With the rain coming down, we had stuck an umbrella in one of the bags to keep the clubs dry while we were driving. That required someone to hold the umbrella in place and keep it from becoming like one of those parachute-stopping devices on drag cars.

While I was half turned and holding the umbrella with one hand, Mike drove the cart right through a hole, which jolted ligaments in my shoulder. I asked him if he saw that hole and his reply was he thought he could miss it between the wheels.

He just slightly misjudged and in the process caused me to hit my head on the roof! At one point, I thought I was in the Fast and Furious movie, “Tokyo Drift” when we swung around to pick up a ball one of the guys had left behind.

It reminded me of the first time he drove a go cart by himself. He got in front of me and was so impressed with himself, he looked back at me with a big grin and then proceeded to miss the next turn and cut right across the grass, bumping along until he got back on the track.

In the end, we made it back to the club house in one piece. We scored pretty well in the four man best ball tournament and each took home a new Callaway driver as first place prizes! … I just hope Mike’s driving on the road is a little better than his driving on the fairway

Here’s the thing: There is nothing better than being in the passenger seat when God is driving. When you let Him lead, it might be a wild ride at times but it will be exciting and filled with adventure.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has been your most exhilarating experience? Leave your comment below.

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Dreading Another Shopping Trip

Shopping is NOT my favourite sport. I like to do almost anything else rather than shop, unless you count doing work around the house. But for me, shopping for clothes with my wife is in a whole other category.

For starters, shopping – especially in a mall – causes an energy drain in me like nothing else. I can enter a mall standing tall and walking briskly, but after a couple of stores I’m trudging along like a soldier carrying a 40 lb. backpack at the end of a 20 km hike.

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I don’t understand how women can shop for clothes. The options are limitless, and I’m just talking about the stores to choose from. In any given mall there’s an average of three men’s clothing stores, but there are usually over 10 stores carrying women’s garments.

In each store, there are racks and racks of clothes that look very similar with merely a pattern or colour change to them. But it seems most women have to browse each and every rack.

There is something about touching the clothes that women feel they must do. They have to touch almost every piece of clothing in the store. I can tell if I’m going to like something standing five feet from the rack, but women have to grab hold of each piece and look at the front of it … and then the back of it.

I don’t know much about women’s fashion, but if you’re a “winter” don’t even go near the yellow and peach displays. It’s a waste of time.

Women’s clothing stores also crowd their space. There are too many clothes for the square footage. For men, this causes a huge problem. We are left standing in a sea of shirts and skirts and accessories with very little room to walk around.

It’s in women’s stores that you find men holding purses … not because they want to, but because their wives have to try on a third or fourth coat just to make sure that the first three coats that looked the same were the wrong ones.

Why don’t they put chairs in women’s clothing stores, either by the entrance so we can catch our breath before we move on to yet another store, or near the change room so we don’t have to be called over to look at something?

I’ve looked at other men in women’s stores and they all have the same glazed over look in their eyes, like they’ve been hypnotized by bright blues, many shades of red, and green patterns on the blouses – do they still call them blouses or just shirts now?

It should be mandatory to put comfort stations in women’s clothing stores, like a play area for men instead of kids. You can picture it, can’t you? – complete with comfortable chairs, a big screen TV with some game on, complimentary drinks and peanuts while you waited.

I know, that’s called a restaurant … never mind. Hey Lil, I’ll meet you in the sports lounge around the corner when you’re done shopping; here’s your purse back.

Here’s the thing: When I look at my life, the things I do each day, places I go, things I say, God should rolls His eyes and be completely uninterested in my life. But it’s absolutely the opposite! He is interested in every aspect of my life, no matter how many times I do, say and think the same things. God doesn’t get worn out being attentive to my life.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do to stay engaged in an activity that doesn’t naturally interest you?  Leave your comment below.

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The Season I Hate The Most!

When we think of seasons, we think of spring, summer, fall and winter. But there are other seasons too, you know. Some I really look forward to, like golf season, biking season, and hockey season that is nearing an end. Then there are seasons I don’t really like – tax season is one of them.

Seasons all have prevailing weather patterns associated with them. Tax season definitely has a weather pattern: prevailing dark clouds with an 85% chance of rain!

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It starts in January when you get your T4 slip (Canada), charitable receipts etc. You also start to think about making that late RRSP contribution before the end of February deadline.

The information starts to churn in your stomach and nag at the back of your mind, reminding you to get moving on your taxes. There are also constant promptings in the malls, with partitioned booths set up everywhere offering to do your taxes for a fee.

I should be glad for tax time because I get a refund. But the thought of a sunny refund is clouded over by the thought of having to prepare my taxes in the first place. It’s like a clash of high and low pressure fronts creating barometric pressure that would give anyone a headache!

My wife wants me to get someone else to do our taxes, but I don’t like the idea of spending my money, just to get my money back from the government.

I wouldn’t say the CRA (Canada Revenue Agency) picks on me, but about every two years I get a letter asking for more information or they will take some money back. I would think there are other people who make a lot more money than me with possible errors to hunt down.

I have completed my daughter’s taxes for her and she is now experiencing the bright, warm weather of a coming refund … even though Calgary is facing spring snow and cold temperatures.

I’ve got all the paperwork together to do my wife’s and my taxes. I’ve even started to enter in some of the information. There’s just one hitch: my son. He’s keeping the clouds from moving on. I need him to do his taxes before I can complete mine, so I know what I can claim for his education.

So here I sit under an umbrella in my own house, trying to stay dry, trying to put on a happy face in the midst of my depression and looming tax clouds!

I know tax season will be over soon; I know there are sunny days ahead. But I must have a bit of farmer in me. I feel like heading down to the coffee shop to chew the fat with the boys. You know, complain that if it doesn’t stop raining the crops aren’t going to be any good this year.

Hey, I’ll make it through.

Here’s the thing: We can stay in a state of hopelessness because of circumstances or sin. We can complain about it, worry about it, even fuss about it to others as to how we are hard done by. Or we can take our sorry state and do something about it. Take it to God, and allow Him to work on it for you and with you. … Maybe I should take my taxes to H&R Block.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you tend to complain about instead of taking action towards? Leave your comment below.

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I Need A New Toy

There was a home show in town this past weekend. It was advertised as the home, cottage, boat and power show. I thought, with a title like that, there had to be something for everyone! So I went.

My wife was away for the weekend so I took in the show by myself. If I had been with Lily, we would have focused on ideas for our cottage. But on my own, I ended up focusing my attention on the boats.

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I’m not an experienced boater. I’ve never owned one, and rarely ever driven one, but there is something about boats that attract me. For many years, I’ve thought my brother and I should buy a Seadoo and share it between us. It’s our wives that are keeping us from turning that thought into something we can sit on and jump the waves of Lake Huron with!

At this show, I had no one dragging me to some booth that was selling a showerhead that made you feel like you were in the rain forest. I didn’t have to spend any time listening to someone tell me about how I could clean the siding on my cottage with their miracle product. I didn’t even have to check out all the crafty booths that made things we could – but never would – put up on our walls.

I went straight for the boats. They had all kinds: paddle boats, but they weren’t fast enough; fishing boats, but they were too plain. They had a few Seadoos that caught my attention. But the real attraction was the large inboard motorboats, especially the ones with cabins below the deck.

I had to take my shoes off before I climbed in, but I didn’t mind at all because, if I was buying one of those bad boys, I didn’t want shoe prints all over it. On the other hand, I wasn’t too crazy about having other people’s smelly feet all over my boat (just using my imagination here).

I went right for the driver’s seat, to get the feel of being a skipper. I could imagine the wind blowing my hair back, and envision me yelling to the person sitting beside me just to have a conversation.

After a while, I let someone take my spot behind the wheel. He looked like he could handle it, even though he was only about 13 years old. I decided to check out the cabin. It had everything you would want: a bed, bathroom and kitchen.

Though it was really amazing and beautiful, I now know why people spend most of their time on deck. They can’t stand being down below for all that long! It’s so small! I’m not a big guy but I thought I might have to go on a diet just to get into the bathroom! I pictured all the accidents that would happen in the little kitchen as we’d bump into each other.

Right then I realized, it’s a nice dream – the kind of dream that should stay a dream! I’ll keep the cottage. As I came out of the cabin, I turned to the 13 year old in the captain’s chair and said, “Keep her on course”, and then walked off the end of the boat.

Here’s the thing: We can spend our lives chasing down things we become attracted to, only to find out they’re not all we hoped them to be. We should continually seek to renew our attraction to Christ, because He is more than we could ever hope Him to be … He’s perfect for us!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you stay attracted to Christ? Leave your comment below.

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When The Couch Is Call’n

Sunday afternoons I like to take a nap on the couch. It’s not really that I like to take a nap, rather I NEED to take a nap. There is some kind of power that overtakes me and I can’t do anything about it.

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Last Sunday was a good example. I was up early at 6 am, had a busy morning, preached a sermon, greeted people at the door, and by the time we locked up and headed home from church it was about one in the afternoon.

After lunch I wanted to watch a little golf, but there was a hockey game on first, so I settled in to catch the last period. Lily came down to join me and show me something on Facebook.

I watched it and then, as we talked, I could feel myself slipping away. Lil noticed and started laughing, which stirred me a little. She said she was going to change the channel to something else. I said, “Don’t. I’m watching the game.” She simply grinned and replied, “I’ll wait 30 seconds ‘till you fall asleep.”

In a matter of a minute I could feel myself going. It’s hard to describe the feeling, but everything around me becomes a blur. The noise from the TV is nothing more than static white noise and I can’t make out what anyone is saying.

Somehow, like Sampson, strength leaves my body and my limbs become heavy and useless. There is also a sense like someone has hit the remote switch on my eyelids and they slowly descend over my eyes like having automated blinds on your windows.

Once that happens, I can’t give you any more details. I am gone, gone gone! And Lily freely changes the channel without any opposition from me.

What happened on Sunday was not the first time. This is a regular Sunday afternoon occurrence – one that I’ve practiced for years … too many years to count, in fact. I inherited this trait from my father and grandfather. For many years I watched them go through this same Sunday afternoon process.

Back then I thought it was wasted time, but somehow, somewhere in my 30’s, it showed up in my life. At times I have fought it and kept myself busy during the afternoon, but more and more I am embracing this phenomenon.

It may have something to do with my ability to sleep pretty much anywhere. If I can get horizontal or even semi-horizontal, there is a very good chance I won’t be entering into conversation for very long.

It’s clear that there is probably nothing I can do about the Sunday afternoon nap. It’s now a habit … and you can probably predict what I will be doing next Sunday afternoon!

Here’s the thing: There was a time when it seemed like work to try to fit even 5 minutes in my day to spend with God. But as my relationship with God has grown more and more, it’s almost automatic now for me to get up before anyone else in the house and spend an extended time with Him. So you can probably predict where I’ll be at 6 am most days.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has become automatic regarding your relationship with God? Leave your comment below.

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Stop Staring!

We had dinner the other night in a restaurant that looked like a hunting cabin. I’m not much of a hunter – never been hunting, unless you count picking off barn swallows with a pellet gun when I was about twelve. I’m also not much of a fisherman. I have fished but I found it to be a bit of a snoozer for me.

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I took our kids fishing on vacation a couple of times when they were little. I had to carry their rods, put the worms on their hooks, untangle their lines when they got too close to each other, and take the fish off the hooks (that part didn’t happen much). It didn’t leave me much time to fish, and just about the time I got my line in the water they were ready to call it quits.

… So having dinner in this place didn’t necessarily make me feel like I was in a familiar place.

Don’t get me wrong, it was very comfortable. We sat in high wingback chairs like the kind you would find in someone’s living room. And all around were reminders that humans are at the top of the food chain.

There were stuffed animals everywhere you looked. These were not the fluffy kind you buy your kids at Toys R Us, but rather the dead kind you buy from the taxidermist.

I kind of wondered if you could order a meal by just pointing to an animal on the wall and grunting a bit. But when I looked at the menu, it didn’t offer any otter, but there was one on the wall!

The whole place was kind of rustic. There was a big old fireplace in the middle of the room and the walls looked like the inside of a log cabin which is what the outside of a log cabin looks like too. When we were shown to our table, I found myself sitting directly in front of the fireplace, above which was huge moose … not a whole moose, just a head.

This moose head came out from the wall a long way, and I couldn’t tell if he had a happy look on his face because he was friendly or because we all looked like a late night snack to him. Apparently, mooses (as I like to call them) are vegetarians so I guess he was glad to see us.

But still, it looked like he had an eye on me. Every time I looked up I saw old Bullwinkle gawking at me. I tried to avoid his stare but something about him commanded my attention.

One time, I said something funny to my wife and then looked at the moose to see if he also got it. He was still smiling so maybe he did. By the end of dinner, I was used to him watching me. I felt like we were buddies, even though he never said a word.

Still, I didn’t turn my back towards him till I got out the door. See ya next time, friend.

Here’s the thing: There is nowhere you can go where God is not present. There is nowhere you can be that He doesn’t see you. It should be comforting to know God is always there … unless you are somewhere you shouldn’t be, and then it should be unnerving.

That’s Life!
Paul

Question: How do you feel about knowing God sees you all the time? Leave your comment below.

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He Said It Would Save Me Time

Sometimes a phrase or sentence – even a word – can save you a lot of time. Recently, I spent hours doing a mundane little task because I didn’t first receive some crucial information.

I bought a new program that tracks and keeps all the information about my sermons in one place.  But there’s a learning curve. I’m learning how to build scripts, portals, and containers.

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It might sound fun – like I’m working on a time machine – but it’s just a database. When I’m done it will be slick, but I still have lots to figure out. I worked on it pretty much my entire day off this week, and I’ll need to spend several more off hours to get it working right.

When I’m done, it will be awesome … in a nerdy, database kind of way. From just one screen I will be able to plan, research, grab resources, catalogue … and clean up after breakfast! It’s like sitting down to do your taxes and having all the information you need in front of you … and not having to get up to find some receipt, address or your son’s tuition information.

I enjoy figuring out how to use this program but what I don’t like is doing work to correct the mistakes I’ve made. I have been watching instructional videos of a guy explaining different aspects of the program. I have a new appreciation for people who have to listen to me preach every week.

The difference is people listen to me for a half hour or so, once a week. I’ve been listening to this same whiney-voiced guy for about 10 hours straight! You can imagine how annoyed I am with him right now. And when, about 5 hours in, he said that it is better to set up a numbering system BEFORE you enter your data, my mood turned really ugly towards him.

I have been building my database while I’ve been learning. In the process, I have already imported 980 records! These are records of my messages, titles, themes, and passages, dating back to 1997!

But then my friendly little instructor says I need to give a specific or unique number to each record in my database. And in a casual way he says, “You will save a lot of time if you do this before you import your data.”

I felt like reaching into the computer and grabbing him, not to hurt him, just to shake him a little and scream into his ear, “Why didn’t you say that right at the beginning?!” It was just one sentence. He could have said it in the introduction. It would have saved me hours! I had to manually go back into every record and number them. What a waste of time.

It was a long, boring task, and a few times I lost track of the numbers and had to go back and correct the sequence. But now that it’s done, and I’m further into my learning, I see how essential it was for me to make that little correction.

Here’s the thing: Life is just like that. At the beginning, we don’t know everything we need to live a godly life. We learn as we go and often find that we’ve made some mistakes along the way. The sooner we discover those mistakes, the easier it is to correct them. That’s why it’s good to keep short accounts with God.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: What do you wish you had known ten years ago? Leave your comment below.