my experiences

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I Need A Car Real Soon

Well, I’m in the market for a car but I do have some standards – mind you, they aren’t that high.

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I don’t have a certain make of car that I have to drive, though I remember growing up we always had GMs.

My dad went through the models. In the early sixties we had Pontiac Parisiennes; in the late sixties and early seventies it was Oldsmobile Delta 88s. Then in the mid to late seventies and on it was Buick LeSabres.

In fact, my Dad never drove anything but Buick LeSabres from then on.

For me, I’ve been all over the map: Buick, Renault, Chrysler, Ford, Lincoln, GMC, Honda, Hyundai.

I’ve never owned two of the same make of car in a row. You could say with this that I’m a blank slate. I’m open to any kind of car.

However, there is one thing that I would like and that is a little peace and quiet. In our last car we didn’t get much of that.

When driving on the highway, Lily and I would practically have to shout at each other to be heard over the sound of the wind outside the car.

It was almost like driving with our windows down all the time.

So quiet is a big deal, and then there is room. We would also like something that is a little bigger than our previous car.

It doesn’t have to be too much bigger, but a little would be nice.

The car doesn’t even have to be new. In fact, I have an aversion to making payments so on that account a new car is not that attractive.

I just don’t like to be paying for a car for years and, when I’m finished paying for it, find it’s time to get a new one and have to start the payment thing all over again.

To make it worse, I also have an aversion to paying interest. If I had to I could stomach a 0% interest payment for three years or so, but that’s about it.

… I think I have about a week to get that kind of deal before they disappear for a while.

A used car is probably what we will end up with – something that I don’t have to put too much money into but something that’s going to last us four to six years or so.

There are lots of cars out there and today we will start taking a look.

This is where our kids come in handy. One of our son Mike’s buddies is a car salesman. We’ll see what he can do for us.

Over the years we’ve fed him numerous meals and Lily has given him lots of advice. She even calls him our #2 son. It’s almost like he owes us a good deal.

The biggest thing is we can trust him. We can be sure he will do the best he can to get us into the right car that meets all our standards.

Here’s the thing: Often in life we find ourselves at a crossroads. We need to make decisions that require more insight than we have. We need people who can step in and help us in those times. When it’s a spiritual matter, a spiritual mentor or life group is invaluable. Be sure to surround yourself with people who can help you make the right spiritual moves.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How long does it take you to reach out for help on spiritual matters? Leave your comments below.

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Is The Whole Greater Than All Its Parts?

You’ve heard the phrase “the whole is greater than the sum of its parts”. The quote goes back a long time; it’s from Aristotle. But let me spin it another way.

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More recently, we associate this phrase with synergy – the idea that when people work together what they produce is greater than what they could collectively do on their own.

In music when a group of jazz musicians jam together they feed off each other and create a sound that is greater than what they could produce on their own instruments.

This is why team work is so important when working on projects, in sports or pretty much anything.

However, this principle is opposite when it comes to fixing something.

The whole costs less than the sum of its parts … and that’s the phrase that’s more on my mind these days.

A week ago I wrote a post about the car accident I had with a deer (you can read it here). I kind of thought that my car won that fight. I mean, I think the deer probably lived but it was banged up more than my car … but perhaps I was a little hasty with that thought.

In the wisdom of the collision appraiser, he thinks the car has more damage than it’s worth. In other words, it will cost as much to fix the car as it would to buy one of the same vintage.

Basically what they are saying is that the sum of the parts needed to fix my car costs more than the whole car is worth … and really we are only talking about four parts on the car! It still runs as well as it did before.

So if I bought all the individual parts the car needs it would cost me more than it would to just buy the finished product.

There’s that synergy working. Normally it would be a good thing, but here’s how it’s a bad deal for me …

I have a diminishing deductible on my insurance. So if they fix my car, for whatever price, I don’t pay anything and I get my car back intact like it was before the accident – like the deer incident never happened.

Instead, however, because all those parts cost more than the whole car is worth, the insurance company will probably give me some money for the car and I will have to add to that total in order to get a replacement for my vehicle.

In the end it will cost me money out of my pocket to get a car on the road again.

And because I don’t want to go back to a 2009 vehicle in 2016, I will have to purchase something that is newer and more expensive.

This “the whole is greater than the sum of its parts” works out great for the insurance company.

Somehow I have to figure out how to get some synergy working for me.

Here’s the thing: God never intended us to live the Christian life on our own. We were created to live as Christ followers in community. So when you think of your life in Christ, consider all the parts: personal time with God, worship, learning, growing, and serving. It’s when we do these together that we experience the whole being greater than the sum of its parts.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What parts to your Christian life are you lacking right now? Leave your comments below.

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Accidents Happen In The Blink Of An Eye

It happened in the blink of an eye; the deer came out of nowhere. Last night we hit a deer traveling to our cottage to close it up for the winter.

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I had no time to react, just absorb the hit and keep the car on the road.

It was the perfect scenario for such an accident. It was dark, and there was a misty rain in the air, so visibility was hindered.

My headlights picked up the deer about one to two seconds before we hit him. All I could do was hold on to the steering wheel and keep the car steady.

We hit him in his hind quarter and he glanced off the passenger side of the front bumper.

I figure he came toward the headlights from the shoulder on the same side of the road as us. At the last moment he tried to veer off, and that’s when we clipped him.

The car continued to drive fine, but everything was not okay.

The plastic bumper was cracked and smashed. He took out our light assembly on the passenger side, and the front quarter panel was pushed back slightly so that the passenger door wouldn’t open very much.

The hood sustained a small crease and though it stayed shut, I’m unsure whether it would shut again if I tried to lift it.

The deer kept going.

On the inside of the car, we were fine. No airbags went off; neither Lily or I sustained any injury. But the dashboard lights went out, and I found out later the passenger tail light was also out.

I’ve never had a head-on collision before … unless you count the time I ran into a fence.

I was about 10 years old and my grandfather had been keeping an old 1930’s car in our driveway.

Some of the boys on the street thought it might be a great idea if we pushed the car into our backyard to see how far it would roll.

We had a little hill at the top of our yard, so all we really needed to do was get the car rolling and then let gravity do its job.

I was the logical driver since the car was on my property and it was my grandfather’s car.

It was my first time behind the wheel. I couldn’t even reach the pedals but that was okay because the drive was all about momentum.

Actually, for my first driving lesson I did pretty well. I kept the car going straight, didn’t swerve or even hit anyone. It all went great until I hit the fence at the end of the yard. No damage; the car went into the chain link fence and bounced back a bit.

The only damage came later when I had to face my dad concerning my first driving incident!

Yesterday caused a little more damage to the car than that first head-on 50 years ago.

I’m kind of hoping this is my last collision. I do plan, however, to tell my friends who are hunters that I got my first deer.

Here’s the thing: Things in life can happen very quickly, with little or no warning. You can’t always be ready and prepared for what is coming next. That’s why it’s best to have your future settled, for whatever might happen. Be sure that you have a relationship with Christ Jesus, and that you are trusting Him now and for the future.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What plans have you made for the future? Leave you comments below.

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I’ve Been On The Road Too Much!

I think I just need to stay put for a little while. I feel like I’ve been on the road too much.

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Over the last month I’ve done a fair bit of traveling – not to any exotic or far away places … I’ve just been doing a lot of driving.

The good thing is I like driving, but I think it’s time to take a break and stay closer to home for a while.

Our cottage is almost 500 kilometres away from us (that’s 310 miles), and in the last month I’ve made that trip two and a half times – about 2,500 kilometres.

This last trip sort of finished me off. I had meetings just east of Toronto and then was going to take in a one-day seminar up north where our cottage is.

I spent a night at our daughter’s home, then two nights in a hotel, another night at our daughter’s and then one night at our cottage.

There was one more stop along the way, however. Our son is moving and we offered to help him do some apartment hunting in Burlington, which is southwest of Toronto.

That little adventure went very well and we found something for him by lunch time. We were pretty happy about our find and relieved that one more detail of his move was settled.

But I was already pretty tired and we had another 2 1/2 hours of driving to get to the cottage.

We were driving on different roads than we normally take and it seemed we were winding our way through the countryside and at the mercy of slow moving vehicles and road construction.

I’m not sure whether it was all the driving we were doing or the amount of time I was spending in the car, but I began to think that we needed a new car.

… a car that floated on air; one that was quiet on the inside, with no sound of the road or the wind; a car that had seats that formed to your body, and one you could put on auto-pilot and sit back and close your eyes in.

I guess I’m describing a limousine service. And I sure could have used it! By the time we got to our cottage I was done in.

I needed to just lie down and take a nap. But even that seemed to be short-lived. I was interrupted by dinner and then a walk along the beach.

Even waking up the next morning came an hour or so too early for my liking, but we had the seminar to attend and then pack up and head back home.

I felt a little like a rock star on tour. They say sometimes they don’t remember what town they’re in; it’s all a blur.

For me, I just want to stay inside the city limits for a week or so. Then I’ll probably be ready to make another trip.

Here’s the thing: One of the reasons traveling takes a toll on you is you get out of your routines and are away from everything familiar. You sleep in different places, eat out more, and don’t have the comfort and familiarity of home. One thing you can do to help steady yourself is to keep your time with God. Remember that no matter where you go, He is our constant; He never changes. Our home is with Him.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How does traveling unsettle you? Leave your comments below.

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Why Barbecues Don’t Last

I know it’s getting late in the season – I’m talking barbecue season – but things are starting to fall apart, literally … and what’s falling apart is my BBQ!

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There are all different shapes and sizes of BBQs out there, ranging in price from around $100 to $2000. But no matter the price, they are all going to last basically the same length of time. In three to five years you will be looking for a new one; it’s just how they’re made.

I’ve had my BBQ for five years now, and it’s actually in pretty good shape. If you looked at it with the lid down you’d think, “You don’t need a new Q; what you’ve got is just fine.”

But when the lid is lifted, and you get to see the grill, let me tell you, that thing is disintegrating!

It’s a cast iron grill and don’t get me started on the maintenance that’s needed to keep these grills in good working order! You need to devote about 40 percent of your spare time just to “season” the grill so that it won’t rust and start to flake off.

I can’t begin to guess how much canola oil I have put on that grill, painting the grid over and over, only to need to do it the next time I pulled back the cover.

I really need a new grill. But when you look at the size of the grill in comparison to the overall size of the BBQ, though it’s a small part, it costs a lot of money.

I would have to spend about $100 to replace it … that is, if I could find a replacement grill!

You see, all the manufacturers have different grill sizes. There is no standard, making it impossible to find your exact size anywhere.

The only thing you can do is get those universal grills that supposedly adjust to fit your size. But I don’t think that’s the answer, either.

The one guaranteed thing about barbecuing is that the grill takes a bit of a beating. You scrape it with wire bristles; you use a spatula to flip meat on it … that grate gets moved from side to side.

Those universal grills they can’t take the workout. They don’t hold the size you adjust them to. After about one use, your universal grill falls onto the burners just because you tried to scrape a bit of stuck on chicken off the grill.

Then there are the burners – they rust out too.

But yesterday I had to roll my barbecue out to the road for our annual street BBQ … one of the nuts on the lid came off and I lost a bolt.

… I may be looking at the season-ending sales on BBQs in the next couple of weeks. I’m just letting you know in advance, Lil.

Here’s the thing: The Christian life is not meant to be started and then left that way. What I mean is you can’t expect your time with God to remain the same without changing. Your involvement in the church will also need some changes over time. Certainly your relationship with God, and how you follow Him will change as you journey with Him. If these things don’t change, you will start to rust and your Christian life will start to decay. We continually need to allow the Holy Spirit to breathe new life into us, and that will mean making changes along the way.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Have you noticed any rust in your Christian life? Leave your comments below.

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Live Life By The Codes

There used to be unwritten rules that you lived by. I’m not sure, but maybe some of those codes are changing – certainly some are disappearing.

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We all know some unwritten rules, things you just do or don’t do. No one has to say anything; it’s just the way things work.

When I was a kid one of those codes was that you didn’t tell on your brother. Nobody told me to do that; it was just what you did.

There are all kinds of these unwritten rules that we follow to help one another out, to be on the same side.

But some of these rules or codes that we live by aren’t being followed anymore.

In hockey there used to be an unwritten rule that you didn’t go after the superstar of the team. You didn’t try to hit him too hard; you didn’t cheap shot him.

But that code started to disappear so they had to put a tough guy on the same line as the superstar as a deterrent. It was like a warning: you lay a finger on Wayne Gretzky and you will pay the price of having Dave “Cement Head” Semenko come after you.

Now it’s a free-for-all on the superstars of the team. The game has changed and the enforcers are not there anymore.

And maybe that’s what it’s like everywhere … times have changed and it’s just different.

There used to be a code among drivers that a car coming the opposite way would flash their lights to warn you if there was a police radar up ahead. It was common practice.

It’s illegal now – maybe it always was – and people don’t do it anymore.

There is no code of the road for drivers to look out for each other. It’s no longer us against the speed trap.

But I got a break the other day.

I was going up a hill on a highway, maybe going a little fast … maybe. There was a line of cars coming down the hill the other way. In the middle of the pack I thought I noticed a car flash his lights. I almost missed it because it was so unusual.

I took my foot off the accelerator. As I got to the crest of the hill and started down the other side,  there he was – a black and white OPP waiting for me.

Well, thankfully he wasn’t waiting for me because someone on the other side of the hill remembered the code and warned me.

We were on the same team; it was us against them. I kind of doubt that many others caught the same warning I did. We just don’t live by that code anymore.

The unwritten code of the road is you look out for your fellow drivers. It’s a great code. Unfortunately, most of us drive in such a way that our fellow drivers are our competition or enemies on the road.

… Driving might be a whole lot more enjoyable if we followed the codes.

Here’s the thing: There are faith codes as well. When someone confides in us, the unwritten code is to pray for that person or issue – not just once, but to keep that person in your prayers. However, with our busy, more self-centred lives, we often fail to live by the code. Get back to praying for the needs of others who bring their concerns to you … and keep at it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What unwritten code would you like to bring back? Leave your comments below.

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He Was Just One Step Behind

We are all just one step ahead or one step behind someone else.

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We are either in a position to help someone who’s coming up behind us or to seek the advice of someone who’s already doing what we are about to do.

The other day I watched the Olympics 100 metre final with Usain Bolt and our Canadian kid, Andre De Grasse.

He pronounces his name “De Grass” but it should be pronounced “Degrassi” because of the Canadian TV show that made the name so popular. Even Usain Bolt, in an interview after the run, referred to him as “Degrassi”.

The whole way through the race Usain was just a step ahead of Andre. When it was over, they congratulated each other like big brother, little brother.

There was the sense that this young kid will be stepping into the shoes of the great runner, Usain Bolt.

This isn’t something that only athletes do.

All of us have opportunities to glean from people who are just a step ahead of us or help those who are coming up behind us.

I recently got a phone call from a friend who had a heart attack a couple of months ago. He had heard from my brother that I had had one four years ago. He wanted to ask me some questions as he was a step behind me.

We shared our stories of how the attacks went down, and then compared the medications we were taking. He had questions about how he was feeling and the side effects to some of the drugs.

He wanted to know what the future would hold for him, and I was enough of a step ahead to be able to give him some comfort.

It was interesting, though, as I reflected back. At first, all I remembered were the positive things – I remembered how easy the recovery was.

But as we talked and he shared some of his concerns, I remembered having some of those same thoughts. His experience jogged my memory.

But from my experience, I was able to dispel some of his concerns that could cause anxiety. Looking at me, one step ahead, he could have hope that it was going to be alright for him, too.

You know, it’s great to have that kind of relationship, where both people sense they are not alone, that someone else knows what they are going through. There is a feeling that you are part of a brotherhood, a fraternity that shares a common trait or quest or experience.

There are things that only those who’ve experienced what you’ve experienced can share together.

It gives you a sense that there are others who understand you, identify with how you feel, and know the kinds of thoughts you have, who you can go to to work through some of your questions.

Andre De Grasse and Usain Bolt, both draped in their reflective flags, walked arm in arm, while Usain whispered some words of encouragement to the man who was just one step behind him.

… and you know those words were good by the smiles on both of their faces.

Here’s the thing: We call this relationship mentoring and, no matter what you are experiencing in life, there is probably someone close by you who’s one step ahead or one step behind. Seek them out; it’s how we go forward, in life and with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who has been your greatest mentor? Leave your comments below.

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You Can’t Capture It

“You just can’t quite capture it,” I thought to myself as I looked over my wife’s shoulder. She was taking pictures of the sunset.

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It was spectacular that night, but what I viewed on her screen didn’t compare to what I saw just above the horizon of her phone.

Almost every night it’s the same thing. Well, it’s different in that the sunset is brand new every night, but it is just as amazing one night to the next.

All we can do is capture a portion of it, a scaled down version and reminder of what we really saw. We can’t capture the vast scope of it, nor can we capture the depth of what our eyes drink in. There is nothing like it.

The crazy thing is it’s free. Every night it only costs us a twelve minute walk, or a three minute bike ride down to the shore to take it all in.

My wife, Lily, and I were at a market the other day where someone was selling large prints of nature scenes. There were pictures of the beach, flowers and trees in the woods.

They were all stunning and inviting. They were also so cheap I wanted to buy at least one, but we didn’t have a wall that was big enough to hang one on. And how long could I look at the same picture without wanting, needing something different to look at?

Even with the cheap cost and beauty of these images, they paled in comparison to the free sunsets that go for as far as your eye can see, until the sun dips below the horizon on the lake.

And these sunsets are different every night. One displays a pale blue sky overlaid with light orange ribbons of colour. Another is a dark red fireball that sends deep pink and purple brush stokes across the clouds to complete the vista.

You can’t keep them though. You want to take one home, to look at it and then be able to look back at it again.

And maybe again.

But it is gone when the darkness takes over and erases the enormous etch-a-sketch in the sky.

People, all kinds of them, with their cameras and phones, lingered to take captive one last shot of the never returning sunset before them.

There was a little sense of melancholy at the end, but not too much because everyone there knew there would be a new one the next night.

I was ready to go for ice cream, but Lily wanted a few more pictures and even after that she wanted to just stand and watch for a while, as if it was an intriguing drama on the big screen.

No, it’s just a sunset. It’s big and bold; it changes every day, and it’s free for all. You just can’t really capture it.

Here’s the thing: You can’t capture a picture of a sunset that really shows what it’s like, but the sunset captures you. And that is God’s intent with creation. He has made it so it will draw us to His beauty, grandeur and magnificence. We can’t capture or fully understand God, but He can capture our hearts and our minds with what He has made for us. Allow God to capture your heart; the encounter will be new and fresh every day like a sunset.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Where have you seen the best sunsets? Leave your comments below.

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I’ve Been Waiting For A Long Time

Waiting is something we do all the time, but not that well. I guess I shouldn’t speak for everyone; there must be someone out there who’s good at waiting.

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But I would say, on average, not many of us enjoy it. We are programmed to get things fast.

I was recently at a farmers’ market and there were all kinds of people at this one booth, trying to purchase vegetables.

The seller was helping one person at a time, but I noticed a woman getting things herself. Then instead of waiting until the seller had finished with someone else, she handed a five dollar bill over everyone’s heads, showed what she had and left. She didn’t wait at all.

Most of us would do that if we could (if we didn’t think it was impolite to butt in line) because we hate waiting.

I just read the other day that there are three hour wait times at the border to get into Canada from the USA. Our dollar is down, and gas is fairly cheap. Why not take a trip to Canada for vacation?

Well, a three hour wait at the border apparently has everyone up in arms. Travellers are pulling their hair out.

Can you imagine a car with a few kids in the back seat, continuously asking, “When are we going to get there?” … and the car hasn’t moved more that five feet in the last twenty minutes?!

Vacation? Those kids will be lucky if they survive the trip through the Canadian border.

Merchants are all up in arms as well. They say that every minute of delay at the border is more money not spent in Canadian stores. They want the government to either schedule or hire more customs officers, like right now!

Forget all this waiting! It’s tough; it’s not easy; we hate it.

But what about waiting on God?

Recently, I needed to fill a preaching assignment for just after my vacation. Usually I have that all set up before I go away, but this year I had already been turned down once and had to wait into my vacation for an answer from a second person.

One week into my vacation I got an answer that he wasn’t going to be available, so I needed a plan B.

Just as I thought of a plan and was about to act on it, I received an email from someone in my congregation who felt compelled to share with everyone what God has been doing in his life.

By the end of the second week of my vacation I had my speaker. I had to wait two weeks for God to provide, but when it was all said and done, I didn’t have to do anything to arrange it. God took care of it.

All I had to do was wait – not easy to do, but sometimes that’s what it takes.

Here’s the thing: We do have to wait for a lot of things in life. We have to wait in lines, at bank machines, restaurants, border crossings, movie theatres, and pretty much anything else you can think of. We also have to wait on God for things. Waiting is not the enemy; waiting is part of life. When it comes to God, waiting on Him will bring the best to whatever we are waiting for. Don’t tear your hair out, or fixate on the waiting. Relax, keep going and see what God will bring about.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to wait on God for that’s been frustrating you up until now? Leave your comments below.

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Frustrated On The Road Again

Traveling the other day, I found myself a little frustrated. The conditions were good; the sun was shining, and the road was dry.

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The traffic, though heavy, was moving at a good pace.

I had some music on and really, what more could you ask for? … Not much, except I would have liked the guy in front of me to get out of the way!

I found him a little annoying. Well, to be honest, a little more than annoying.

For one thing, he didn’t drive at a steady pace. He would keep up with the traffic ahead of him for a few minutes, but then slow down by almost 10 km/hr. I found I was on the gas, off the gas the whole trip.

I would have passed him but it was only a two lane highway and there was steady traffic coming the other way.

I figured he wasn’t much of a skater – he had to have weak ankles not to be able to keep his foot on the gas at an even pressure for very long.

I found myself analyzing what he was probably like. I came up with his personality traits and the kinds of things he was thinking about.

If I had have had a police sketcher in the seat next to me I think I probably would have been able to come up with a fairly good picture of what he looked like.

My picture might not have looked anything like the guy in real life, but it was dark out and so we will never know for sure.

Let’s just say my description fit him to a T.

The other thing that bugged me about his driving was he used his brakes all the time. We were driving on a highway; there were no lights, just straight road!

There was no need to touch the brakes, but it was like he needed to hit them frequently just to make sure the pedal was still there or that someone hadn’t tampered with his brake line.

Like in most things, momentum is key. I’ve learned in mountain biking to try to use your brakes as little as possible, because any forward momentum you’ve built up will be lost as soon as you put on the brakes. Coasting is a better way to control your speed than stepping on and off the brakes.

However, on a bike when you loose momentum, you have to expend a lot of energy pedalling to get it back. In a car you just have to put your foot back on the gas pedal … unless you have weak ankles and can only sustain the pressure on the gas for a short amount of time, like the guy who was driving in front of me.

In the end we parted ways. He turned off the road, and someone else had to drive behind him and get all frustrated.

As for me, I’ll forget about him, but there’s plenty others out there who will take his place in front of me.

Here’s the thing: Life can frustrate you at times. You may even be a little frustrated with God, feeling like He is not clearing the way for you. Patience is required, and maybe that’s what you need God’s help for more than anything else.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has you frustrated lately? What will you do about it? Leave your comments below.