my experiences

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Perfect Timing Is Over-Rated

Timing is everything! A split second off and you miss the shot, you hit the car, you don’t catch your plane . . . well, maybe not.

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My wife and I recently needed to fly from Toronto to Thunder Bay.

Lily had figured out all the details, the flights, the car park, and of course, the time it would take us to get to Toronto, drop the car off and get to our gate with plenty of time to spare.

It all sounded good on paper, but then again, paper doesn’t say anything – it’s all what you read into it. What we didn’t read into the plan was the traffic we might encounter in getting to our destination.

Right from the get-go, the traffic was a little heavier that I had thought it would be. Our 2 1/2 hour drive to Toronto took us a little longer, but we had some extra time built in so I wasn’t fretting.

… until we got about 20 kms from the airport.

The 401 was bumper to bumper, stop and go. There was panic in the car from the navigator’s seat. I can’t tell you how many times I heard the words, “We’re not going to make it!”

There were hurdles all the way. Every time we thought we were catching a break, there would be a roadblock. I thought we were on the TV Show “Amazing Race”.

There was no way we would make the check-in time so Lil checked us in electronically using her phone.

When we finally got off the 401, we thought we maybe had a chance. Then I missed a turn. We drove right past the parking lot for our terminal, but unfortunately we needed to get to the off-site park-and-ride place we’d booked.

When we found the park-and-ride, we thought we might have a chance if they were fast, but there was a car ahead of us who was taking forever to register. Panic filled the air space along with suggestions that we should have paid the extra money and parked at the terminal.

When we finally registered, we were told to pull ahead and wait for the shuttle, then follow it to where we should park before going to the airport. Unfortunately, the shuttle guy didn’t know the script because when he showed us where to park he told us to wait for the back-up shuttle to take us.

More waiting! The waiting was killing my navigator, but it wasn’t long before our shuttle appeared. We told the driver of our predicament and he was pretty calm about it all … though he wasn’t the one scrambling to make a flight that left in twenty minutes!

We ran to security, and there were greeted by a long line ahead of us. Lil said something to the security guard and she took us to the front of the screening line, along with a scolding for not getting to the airport earlier.

Once through security, Lil ran ahead while I carried the bags.

We still had quite a distance to get to our gate and a wrong turn down a hallway didn’t speed up the run. We finally got there, tired and out of breath … and they were still boarding the plane!

We made it.

Here’s the thing: I started praying as soon as we hit traffic on the 401, and even though there were glimpses of hope, each glimpse was met with another impossible hurdle. Yet somehow, some way, against all odds God got us on that flight. Never doubt the power of God in any situation.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: When did God come through for you when all hope was lost? Leave your comment below.

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Why You Should Sit Still For Needles

In my last post, I wrote about not being too keen on going to see the doctor. One of the reasons is they like to stick you with needles.

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Actually, the doctor doesn’t often give the needles; he gets a nurse to do it. That way the patient doesn’t have any animosity towards his doctor; it’s directed towards the nurse!

So not only does the nurse have to do all the dirty work, she also has to be the bad guy. I’m sure that’s why doctors go to school so long, so they have the upper hand on the nurses. It’s a good gig.

Anyway, I said in my last post that I’m not a real fan of needles. I’m not sure when this started, but If I can avoid them I do. It’s not that they hurt – sure, there’s the prick and maybe a little discomfort, especially if they are injecting a boat load of typhoid in you for going over seas, but it’s not bad.

My problem with needles has to do with the whole process: someone sticking something sharp in you while you are sitting still letting it happen. That’s not natural. … You squirm, you move, you fight back to protect yourself – THAT’S the proper response to any kind of personal invasion.

It also bugs me to see that pointy end go into a vein that’s been all pumped up (man, I’d make a terrible drug addict).

You put all those things together and that might be the reason I don’t like needles.

I don’t even like to get them when they can keep me from another kind of pain. For instance, I don’t get freezing when I go to the dentist. I’d rather face the drill on my own than get a needle.

Besides, I like walking out of the dentist’s office not being numb or feeling like my lips are three inches thick.

I don’t want to be that guy who’s unaware that he’s drooling out the left side of his mouth when being introduced to someone for the first time. I have enough problems with spilling food on my clothing, I don’t need a growing wet spot down the front of my shirt as well.

I once had a fifteen minute discussion with a nurse in a hospital emergency room in Regina, weighing the pros and cons of getting a tetanus shot. When I finally said yes and started to roll up my sleeve, she said, “Oh no, it’s going in your rear.”

Well it took me another five minutes to agree to that. I had visions of tensing up so much she would have to put her foot on my rear to yank the needle out!

… It wasn’t nearly as bad as I imagined it would be.

My latest adventure of having my blood tested last week brought back all my memories. The nurse wasn’t the best at giving needles, but she was quick and that’s maybe just as good.

Here’s the thing: Temptation is like getting a needle, where you purposely put yourself in a place of having a painful experience. If we don’t have an exit plan, or try to avoid being tempted in the first place, it’s like sitting down, keeping still and letting someone stick a needle in you. When temptation has its way with us, it leads to sin and, though maybe the pain of that sin is not felt immediately, there will be pain. I’d urge you to avoid that pain. Don’t sit and take it; have a plan when temptation comes.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What kind of a plan do you have for temptation? Leave a comment below.

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Why You Shouldn’t Wait To Commit

It’s no secret that I’m not a frequent flyer at the doctor’s office. I will see my doctor if there is something wrong with me, or on occasion when my wife pleads with me long enough to get checked out.

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Last summer was one of those occasions. In a weak moment, I said I would see my doctor or at least get my blood checked.

I got the form about a year ago, but it was so close to my vacation that I decided to wait until after to go to the lab to let them extract some blood from me.

I’m really not a fan of needles so it’s not something I do just on a whim. I avoid needles at all cost (I’ll write about that in my next blog). I’ve even been known to understate the last time I had a tetanus shot, so they didn’t have to stick me when I was getting stitches.

After my vacation, I delayed going for another couple of weeks, but by the first week of September I got the job done.

Then there came the waiting game. Would I hear from my doctor or would everything check out just fine? I kind of kept my fingers crossed for two weeks, and I didn’t hear anything.

I thought I was in the clear but I still held my breath for another week, just in case.

Then, at the end of the third week, my doctor told me my cholesterol was high. He gave me a couple of options: increase my cholesterol meds or lose weight.

I wanted to try to lose weight because, along with not being a fan of needles, I’m not a fan of medication either.

I was pumped and energized to get going. All fall the weight started coming down … then Christmas came and I lost my focus.

In the new year, my weight bumped up a little bit, so I couldn’t get my blood checked to see if my cholesterol had gone down. I wasn’t near my goal.

By February my doctor gave me the form to get my second blood test. I kept holding off because I couldn’t discipline myself to reach my goal.

Finally, this summer I made some headway on my weight loss again, and though I didn’t reach my goal, I’m hoping that my weight will be low enough to give me a good cholesterol score.

The other day, a year after I received my first lab requisition form, I took my second form (which I’ve had for six months), and got my blood tested.

I’ll let you know how things turn out.

Here’s the thing: When God calls us to make a commitment to something or take on a ministry role of some kind, sometimes our response is that we just need to work on an area of two before we say yes. The problem is there will always be something that causes us to think, “I’m not ready yet”. … If God is calling you to something now, just do it. He knows what you need to work on and He will work on you as you are obedient to His calling.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has kept you from moving forward with God? Leave your comment below.

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Change Happens Over Time

A lot can happen over a long period of time. You don’t notice the change at first because it takes time to develop.

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Recently, we cleaned the deck in our backyard. When we moved in to our house the wood was pressure-treated and it looked great. But over the years it started to look grey and old and there were dark patches that became more dominant.

It didn’t just happen; it gradually got that way so that it kind of snuck up on us. But one day we realized we needed to do something about this deck; it was not looking very good.

Scientists will say that’s the way the whole world works; it’s called evolution. Given enough time, things develop. One problem I see with their theory is that, with everything at my house that changes over time, it changes for the worst!

It deteriorates; it doesn’t get better, or turn into something new and improved. Things get worse.

You might not notice for a while, or pick up on the little signs, or indicators, but down the road at some point you realize that things are not as they were, and it’s not for the better.

This week Lily discovered something in our basement that had developed over the last week or so. I had sort of noticed that there was something going on in our basement, but it wasn’t totally clear to me.

On Friday night, Lily was talking on the phone and walking in the basement when she stepped on a wet part of the carpet.

It wasn’t supposed to be wet there and, as she looked further, she discovered that this wet area was pretty large. It had soaked the bottoms of book cases, a closet organizer and some picture frames.

When Lily told me, I realized what I had noticed earlier – a faint, musty smell that was actually coming from this water.

We knew right away where the problem originated. I had fixed a few taps in the house last week and, in doing that, had to shut off the water in the house. Well, the tap at the water meter had been dripping slowly since that time.

I guess it turns out that taps only last nineteen years because I’ve now replaced all the taps that old in the place!

It’s pretty amazing how a little drip over time can soak such a large piece of carpet and ruin several things. If it had have been a faster drip, I probably would have noticed it and not left it.

But I didn’t notice the leaky tap, and a week later it had created a mess!

It takes some people time to notice things. A few days ago, I was talking to someone and he motioned at my face. I knew immediately what he was referring to – my goatee … which is not there anymore and hasn’t been for a year and half.

There were no lasting effects with my facial hair going undetected. However, we have a big clean up ahead of us from that undetected drip in our basement.

Here’s the thing: Messes, like sin and hurts, if not addressed, can interfere with your relationship with God. They may not be that noticeable at first, but as more messes pile up, the damage to your relationship with God can get to the point where everyone around you notices things aren’t right. Don’t let the little things go unattended and you will keep your relationship with God in good shape.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you noticed that turned into something big? Leave your comment below.

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Silent Communication 

Have you ever wished you had gotten the silent treatment? You know, when someone refuses to speak to you even if you coax them?

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I can’t say that I’ve experienced that in my marriage. Neither Lily nor I use that method of communication.

It sounds funny to say “silence” and “communication” in the same sentence. But we do communicate through silence.

I had an instructor once who had a line he would use all the time in teaching leadership. He would say, “You can not not communicate.” It had a double negative thing going on and sounded funny to hear and to say, but it’s true.

Even in silence there is communication.

When someone goes silent, they may be communicating that they’re mad – believe me, it doesn’t take a mind reader to figure that out!

That’s just one thing that silence can communicate; there are many others …

When someone is silent, it might mean they are sad, depressed, don’t know the answer or don’t know what to say. … Mind you, there are a lot of people who don’t know things but it doesn’t stop them from sharing what they don’t know with words that almost sound like they do know!

Often when someone is silent, we don’t like it. We get uncomfortable when there is silence; we’re so used to having something in the background, some kind of noise.

When we drive in a car, we often have a radio or music playing, even if it’s low and hard to hear. It’s better than just plain silence.

In my car, silence is never an issue. I always have the sound of wind that gets louder the faster you go. They usually call that white noise, but what I experience is beyond white noise.

White noise is gentle, quiet, relaxing, in the background. In my car it sounds like a hurricane is going to break through the glass at any moment and whisk me out of Kansas, right to the land of OZ!

Silence, however, can be appreciated. We have all been in those conversations that we just wished and prayed would end.

Children with their inquisitive minds can make us long for silence … that’s when you play the car game, “Let’s see who can hold their breath the longest as we drive by this grave yard.” Oh, the quiet bliss of those moments of dead air space!

Two people who are very comfortable can remain silent in the same room or place, maybe reading different books, or thinking on their own. But it gets weird if it goes on too long, before someones says, “Hey, listen to what I just read” or “What are you thinking about that’s so funny?”

We were made to communicate, and we do it even in silence. Even when there is nothing to say, even when we can’t find the words to express what we are feeling or thinking.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes God seems silent, and we desperately want to hear from Him. Unfortunately, we don’t have a face or body language to look at to give us a clue as to what He is communicating to us in the silence. The one thing we should not stop doing is seeking to understand what His silence means. Don’t give up; don’t turn away. Keep coaxing, keep investigating what God is saying in the silence.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you feel when God is silent? Leave your comment below.

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The Stress Of Keeping People Waiting

It’s never nice to keep people waiting. There are some people you should never keep waiting, like the human resources person who’s going to interview you for a job.

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When someone is left waiting, it says they don’t matter, or they are unimportant, or you don’t care.

… My wife keeps me waiting almost every time we go out together, but somehow that doesn’t seem to bother her very much because she keeps on doing it. But that’s another blog.

There are times when I panic when it looks like I’m not going to make an appointment on time. I usually feel this way when I’m in the car, rushing to make it to my destination so that I don’t keep the person waiting. I might have my foot heavy on the gas but I just can’t get there fast enough.

It’s not a nice feeling.

The other day I had that feeling in church. We had set up a Skype video chat to take place during our service with a missionary couple in Spain.

There were a few technical things to consider, like getting the video chat from the computer to the big screen in the sanctuary, and getting the sound to go through the church sound system.

Since all that was taken care of, I thought all I had to do was make the call. That’s when the trouble started. My Skype program wouldn’t connect online! I had a few minutes during a song to make the call but I started to panic when it couldn’t connect.

I was really feeling the pressure to get the call going. The silence in the sanctuary raised my blood pressure, and all at the same time I was trying to think of what to do to get the call to go through and what I needed to say to the congregation.

I knew I was keeping my congregation waiting but I was also aware that I was keeping the couple on the other end of the scheduled Skype call waiting too. And they had no idea what was happening on our end.

We quickly went to a commercial break … not really … I wished we could have gone to a commercial. Instead we took up the offering and sang a song.

That gave me time to reset the modem and router, and we took one last stab at it. It wasn’t immediate but after a little fiddling and some assistance, we got the call to work.

The stress, pressure, and panic left me immediately … I don’t think that was good for my heart.

They say that playing hockey is hard on the heart because you get your heart rate up really high and then you go and sit on a bench and your heart rate drops like a rock.

Well, I think that’s what happened to me. My heart rate and everything else in me was racing … until I saw that video on the screen.

… And it was all over keeping people waiting. It’s not nice to keep them waiting, and when we do, we often feel pressured.

Here’s the thing: God wants to meet with us each day, but we keep Him waiting when we don’t make our appointment. Maybe we don’t feel the pressure, or don’t have the panic, but God is waiting. I’m not saying we should feel guilty when we don’t make that meeting with Him. Our meeting can take a different form at a different time. What I am saying is the same importance you would place on not keeping others waiting is the the same importance we should place on meeting with God daily.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Have you ever felt pressured or panicked when keeping someone waiting? Leave your comment below.

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What’s Truly Amazing About Grace 

This is an edited re-post of a blog I published on May 26, 2012. Enjoy.

Let me give you a little insight into my world. Grace is big in a pastor’s life. Most people think pastors are official grace givers at any event.

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At dinner, about 98 percent of the time (a made up stat), people will look to the pastor to say grace.

At wedding receptions, banquets, barbecues, family gatherings, dinner out with friends, anywhere food is being served, probably the pastor will be asked to say grace.

Sometimes I can see the whole thing unfold.

Just before the meal the host will scan the room.  At this point, I can read their mind: they’re thinking, “Whom can I get to say grace?”

Then they spot me, their eyes get big, the expression on their face changes from concern to relief, a smile appears, and then the head nod that says, “ah yes, the pastor. Why didn’t I think of him before?” Then they make a b-line to me.

Actually, I count it an honour to say grace in public.  A few years ago my old high school celebrated its 50th anniversary (not that I was in high school 50 years ago).

I received a phone call asking if I was planning on attending, and if so, would I say grace at the gala dinner banquet.

Based on their knowledge of me in high school, they would never have asked me, but now that I’m a pastor, saying the grace was a perfect job for me.

There are some people who think the pastor has a corner on grace and not just saying it.  I’ve had many people ask me to put in a good word for them with the “Big Guy”.

There have been times where people have made a comment like, “well, you know, he has God on his side.” I could go on, but you get the idea: people think pastors are grace sayers and grace receivers.

One day after I’d had a heart attack a few years back a neighbour said to me, “You having a heart attack? You have to wonder about that.”

He said it as if he didn’t think bad things happened to pastors, or he was questioning what I did to get God mad at me, like maybe I didn’t have God’s grace on my life.

That bothered me because usually people see pastors as being on the good side of grace. I wanted to say, “Wait a minute!  The fact that I’m still here, standing and breathing is a sign I’m on the good side of grace.”

Grace is an amazing thing. It can be spoken as a thanks to God, it can be used as a name (I have a niece named Grace).  It can be given, as undeserved favour, and it can be withheld as punishment. Grace is pretty versatile.

Here’s the thing: The real amazing thing about grace is that we are ALL on the good side of it.  God sent Jesus, His only son, to us as an instrument of grace.  What we need to do is make sure we have received God’s grace by believing in Jesus and claiming him as Lord … and then, live out our days serving Him, knowing that nothing we have done, said, thought or contributed has any merit towards us being recipients of God’s grace. It is God’s unmerited favour on us.  That is truly amazing!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What ways do you see the grace of God showing up in your life?  Leave a comment below.

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How To Judge A Restaurant

There is more to a restaurant than the food. The last couple of weeks, my wife Lily and I have eaten out more than we normally do.

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We’ve eaten out in restaurants from Quebec City to Sauble Beach and I’ll tell you the food that is served has a huge impact on the whole experience.

But almost equally as important as the food is the service. In fact, I would say the service contributes about 50 percent to the eating out adventure.

In our travels, we’ve run the gamut. However, there is a general rule that the finer the restaurant, the better the service. The operative word there is “general”; it’s not always the case, but it is the usual fare.

When fine dining, you have to consider the decor and ambiance, for they are just as crucial to the whole experience as the food and service. … We had an amazing dinner in Old Quebec City that had all the elements working together in perfect harmony.

But we’ve had a couple of less than perfect experiences as well. For instance, the other night we chose to eat out in one of the fabulous restaurants in Sauble Beach. (There are only three.)

In that establishment service was at a minimum. The server took a while to even come by our table to acknowledge our presence in their fine establishment.

While service was at a minimum, water was obviously at a premium because of how long it took our waitress to get it to our table – not to mention that we discovered that water was not refillable … because she never refilled our glasses!

The food was okay for me, but not very good for Lil. And though Lily went on about the food, it was equally the service that made for an unenjoyable time.

When it came time for the bill, we couldn’t get out of the place fast enough. I started the process and received a kick from under the table. A bruise would come about from that kick and it would be in the shape of letters that read, “Don’t give her a good tip.”

I felt those words before I could read them, so I slashed what I normally tip in half.

My daughter once worked in the restaurant business so I know how important tips are to servers. I normally give 20%, but this gal only got 10 from us.

I rarely do that, but she really worked hard at making me feel it was the right thing to do.

In golf they say that putting is half the game. You take the same number of shots to travel a few hundred yards as you do to get the ball to travel 30 feet into the hole.

In the restaurant business it’s the same thing. If you’ve got a great menu but lousy service, it’s not going to appeal to too many people.

We’re now down to frequenting two restaurants in Sauble.

Here’s the thing: There are a lot of people who have prayed to receive Jesus Christ as their saviour, yet their life has not changed very much. They have a hard time identifying how they have grown in Christ. That’s because a decision to follow Christ is not all there is to it. It’s not merely a decision we make; it’s incorporating that decision into everyday living that creates the atmosphere for a changed life – a life that truly has been saved by Christ. Make sure your life embodies what you claim to be true, Jesus as your Lord.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do when you see inconsistencies in your life? Leave your comment below.

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When Something Important Is Kept From You

Have you ever thought that something had been kept from you? You know, when you were little and you caught bits and pieces of a conversation your parents were having?

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You were dying to know what they were talking about, but you were not permitted to hear the details. They kept them from you.

Have you ever thought God might do that with us from time to time?

… Like when two disciples were walking with Jesus and they didn’t realize it was him until after he left them? The Bible says “then their minds were opened”.

A couple of days ago we came up to our cottage to spend a week. It was still April and this was the first time we were up since we closed the place in the fall.

On arrival everything looked in order. It was nice to see the digs had stood up to the winter and won!

We turned everything back on but when I went to turn on the furnace, because it was still April, and it is Sauble Beach, I got no heat.

The furnace came on; I could hear the roar of the blower. I heard the click of the igniter to fire up the furnace, but all that came out of the ducts was cool air.

I checked everything, the switch, the circuit breaker, the gas. It was all working but still no heat.

I worked for about two hours in the cold; I was chilled and frustrated. I couldn’t think of anything else I could do. It had to be a furnace problem; I would have to call a service guy.

But that would be in the morning, and we needed a way to keep warm that night! I borrowed a space heater from my brother’s cottage, and Lily and I went out for dinner, so that I could get warm.

And just to make sure we were going to be warm enough, we also bought a space heater of our own.

That night we were warm alright – almost too warm. In the middle of the night we had to shed some of the covers that we had piled on the bed.

The next morning when I woke up, I lay in bed and an idea popped into my brain. I think God put it there. I think I was kept from that thought the night before.

As I lay in bed, I remembered that we had put duct tape over the furnace exhaust vents in the fall. I realized there probably was a safety feature on the furnace that wouldn’t allow it to fire up if the vents were blocked.

I jumped out of bed, went outside, took off the tape, came back in and “budda boom, budda bing” the furnace worked like a charm.

I shared the tale with some people who told me that a guy had done the same thing years ago, and almost died of carbon monoxide poisoning! They got him out just in time. Wow! Thanks, God.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we’re blocked from getting what we need. God may have a reason for keeping things from us. Be aware that blockages are possible, and when you’re frustrated, seek God. Determine to obey Him and ask Him to reveal what the blockage is and how to remove it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: When was the last time you felt frustrated and blocked from something you needed? Leave your comment below.

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Old Friends Don’t Get Old

Old friends never get old. Well, I guess they do get older, but it’s never old being with them again.

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When you’re with old friends, you talk about things that happened a long time ago and you remember them as if they just happened. You relive the past in the present time.

There is a sense that time stands still when you are with old friends. Even though we don’t have the same physique we once had, and parts of our bodies don’t work as well as they used to, somehow we are able to see ourselves in alter states of say 20 or 30 years in the past.

It’s a curious thing. But much like the size of the fisherman’s catch that got away, our stories seem bigger and better. They amuse and excite others; we get built up in their eyes … or at least our own eyes.

It’s not that it happens all the time. The mood or the atmosphere has to be right to bring back the past in such technicolour, with such glory.

It happened just the other day. Lily and I were with an old friend we went to Bible College with. We’d been watching hockey on TV and I can’t even tell you how the conversation got started.

But one memory connected to another and soon the TV was off (after the game of course), and we were into full-blown nostalgia mode.

You could see it in the eyes and expressions of our kids as they listened on and on to stories they had been part of – tales that were foggy at best in their minds, but were now developing real substance and a vivid image in their newly refined memories.

Some of those stories will be told to their children; some of them will be acted out before their children with a bigger and better feel to them:

… The story of football games in the family room, how I fixed the score before we started, just to create tension and excitement in my kids till they almost burst.

… The stories of back when we were in school, the antics in the dorms that became legendary at the college. It was like we were the heroes of old, the past celebrities recounting life as it was when they were stars.

Those moments create a warm feeling that draws everyone in the room closer together like there is some secret information that they are now privileged to care for … like they’ve been invited into the inner circle.

You just don’t want those times to end; you wish they could continue forever. You want to talk and listen, and continue to light up the eyes of your kids. But you realize that you’re not that age any more. You get tired and can’t pull the all-nighters of the olden days.

You snap back to the reality of the present, and become cognisant that you are thirty pounds heavier, your hair is thinning, and you don’t look anything like the guy in the stories.

But it was great to go back there for a while.

Here’s the thing: You can remember the past, visit the past, make the past seem bigger and better than real life. But you can’t bring the past back to life; you can’t live in the past. So let the past teach you; let it inspire you to live in the present in such a way that you will want to bring colour to this present again. And may God be glorified in those memories.

Question: What were the circumstance that led to your last memory fest? Leave your comments below.