my family

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A Plan That’s Coming Together

My wife’s plan is slowly coming together, and so far it hasn’t cost me any blood, sweat or tears.

For the last couple of years Lily has wanted to redo our kitchen. All our appliances are over 20 years old and the counter top has a few nicks in it.

Those nicks, by the way, are all from Lily’s hand … although she only claims one of them to be hers for sure.

So the counter top seems to be the main item in this refurb, but along with it are some pretty expensive items that may be added a little later than sooner.

There was one item that she slipped in early and that was a new range. She said it made sense to have it in place when they came to measure for the new counter.

Now when I hear “range” I think of a farm, and cattle and grass and stubble. The range Lily had in mind was an induction top convection oven. I’m not sure what all that means other than you have to have the right kind of pots for the elements to work, and you can cook more than one sheet of cookies at the same time … which I’m all in favour of.

This reno may not have cost me blood, sweat and tears, but it is costing a few dollars.

I guess it’s time. This project has been on her list for ages and it seems that more than once we put it on hold because something else needed our attention and money.

At this point we are committed. A down payment has been made on the counter and they are coming to measure in a week or so. According to Lily they will install the counter about two weeks after that.

In the mean time, Lily has already painted the kitchen ceiling, and the range is in place. She still has to paint the walls, and arrange to have some tiling done above the counter.

But there is one other thing that needs to happen and it’s something I’m not too sure about … nor is Lily for that matter.

Rather than breaking the bank on new cupboards, Lily is going to paint our cupboards with some special cupboard paint.

That’s right, she found a paint that is specially designed for painting kitchen cabinets.

Personally, I’m afraid I will have to put on white gloves before I open any cupboard for fear of scratching the paint.

I can just see me putting on those white gloves just like the guy who carries the Stanley Cup.

We’ll probably have a little basket of them as you enter the kitchen. That way no one will be able to gouge Lily’s paint job.

It’s possible that this will work. My only fear is that in a year’s time, we will be looking to purchase new kitchen cabinetry … Cha Ching $$!

Here’s the thing: It’s easy to get in a rut, living with the same things, never changing or upgrading them. We can also live with things in our life, never dealing with or addressing them. We can do that for years, becoming very accustomed to those things – things that need to be replaced, things that need to go. There is no guarantee that making the changes will work out in the end, but give it a try. As uncomfortable as it might be, as inconvenient as it might seem while you are going through the change, in the end you will like the results.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to change in your life? Leave your comments below.

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The Father Daughter Game

She took me! My daughter took me to the game!

Karlie took me to a Toronto Raptors’ game; it was her Christmas present to me. We just went, having planned it for a time I had some business in the area.

I haven’t been to a Raptor’s game in a long time, so I wanted to go to a really good game. You always want your team to win, but especially when you attend a game live.

The trouble with this game was that the Raps were on a 5 game losing skid and their big star, DeMar DeRozan, was injured and not in the lineup.

The good news was they were playing a team that was well below them in the standing.

But my focus was on how my daughter was going to take in this game.

… The last time I took Karlie to a basketball game was in Edmonton. Now Edmonton has never had an NBA basketball team, but a minor league team was operating out of the city for a few years when we lived there.

I took a group of students from our church to a game and had an extra ticket.

I can’t remember the reason why, but I brought Karlie along to the game … she was three.

I’m not sure what I was expecting – an instant love for the game? an ability to understand the intricacies of the play? a keen interest in the players’ skills?

But what Karlie zeroed in on was the team mascot. Though we were sitting way high up in the stands, this fuzzy, energetic animal captured her attention.

I don’t think Karlie watched the game; she just kept her eye on that mascot.

When the game was over, she didn’t want to leave. She wanted to stay. I couldn’t figure out why she wouldn’t want to get going – the game was not a big hit for her. Then she started pointing right at the mascot.

I realized that this event wouldn’t end well without us at least trying to see the mascot.

We headed down to the floor level, and I maneuvered us over to where the mascot was giving high fives to all the kids swarming around him.

We got close but then he turned and started walking away from us. I thought we had missed our chance for Karlie to  get up close with the star of the game.

Just then the mascot stopped. He turned around, looked right at Karlie, got down on one knee and put out his arms.

That was all the invitation Karlie needed; she ran to him and got engulfed in his fur.

That was the highlight; we could go home.

This time around for Karlie, it was all about the skill, the plays and the intricacies of the game – not the mascot … oh, how 24 years changes things.

Here’s the thing: We are supposed to grow in all areas of our life as we get older. To stay the same in an area doesn’t make sense and really only stunts us. Be sure you are still growing in your relationship with God. Don’t be stunted spiritually.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What area of your life have you seen growth in over the last five years? Leave your comments below.

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Christmas Tradition

The Silcock Christmas wouldn’t be the same without our annual tradition.

It’s not a generations old tradition, passed on down from great grandparents. It’s a tradition started with my generation. We keep it every year when we get together for our Christmas gathering.

We play hockey.

My father passed away 11 years ago and, since that time, we decided to do something special when we got together for Christmas.

Hockey is a unifying thing in our family … though over the years there are less and less of the women involved.

When we started, the kids were still pretty young. We would pleasure skate for a bit and then start a game, during which the pleasure skaters were just more obstacles for us to deke around.

It got to the point where the pleasure skaters didn’t really like the pucks whizzing by their heads. They have slowly dropped off over the years.

This year my wife, Lily, was the only pleasure skater and my daughter, Karlie, played hockey with us guys.

In the early days, when the kids were younger, my brother and I kind of dominated the game. It was great having all the ages on the ice working together.

Between my brother, sister and I, we have 8 children. Their ages span 12 years.

Each year we invite a few friends along to round out the teams, and the calibre of hockey is pretty good.

The last two years, the games were really fast-paced.

However, not everything is getting faster. The kids are faster, and their friends they invite out are faster … but my brother and I are slower. We don’t dominate the ice any more.

In fact, my brother John hurt his knee the night before and he didn’t play in our Christmas tradition this year.

I was the old guy.

Now even the youngest of the kids can hold their own, make plays and pass well.

I was the one who was gasping for air and needing to come off for more than regular breaks.

It’s not like I didn’t contribute at all but by far the tables have turned and the young guys are taking over.

It reminded me of a time when my son’s hockey team had a father and son game. The sons were talking like they were going to take it to us and that we didn’t have a chance.

I thought they would be surprised that the old men still had it in them. I guess I was wrong. The other dads either hadn’t played in a very long time, had never really played before, or were really out of shape.

The long and the short of it was, us dads didn’t look good and we got creamed by our boys.

From now on every year I will measure my decline by our Christmas family tradition.

Here’s the thing: As time goes on, we take more of a backseat to those coming up. As the younger generation starts to shine, and we take more of a supportive role in life, don’t merely bow out of the scene. Our role is to instill values and character in the young ones so that as they shine, they shine with the light of Christ in them.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What Christmas tradition do you make sure you keep? Leave your comments below.

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My Hockey Season is Finally Over

We just celebrated Canada’s birthday, and this morning I finally hung up my skates for the season.

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That’s Canada … hockey till July! No wonder some folks down south believe we live in igloos. Those same people probably think we are still skating outside in July.

This is actually the latest I’ve played hockey in several years. There are other things that get in the way, things like golf and mountain biking.

I only have time for so much; something had to give.

I will tell you though, it’s kind of nice showing up to the arena wearing sandals, shorts and a T-shirt … and I’d much rather come out of the arena to temperatures of +25 C with the sun high in a blue sky than -25 C with the wind howling and the snow flying.

It was time to stop; the numbers were getting low. I guess people have other things to do on a Saturday morning.

We only had three aside and two goalies yesterday. It was like playing overtime in the NHL, except we did it for an hour and 10 minutes!

We even made a trade part way through the game, and my team acquired my son in a one-for-one trade.

We made a killing on the trade, and improved our team and chances by a considerable amount.

For the last game of the season, it was nice to be on the same side as my son and set him up for a few goals.

Normally, we are on opposite teams because he refuses to put a white jersey in his hockey bag. … The teams are usually chosen by light and dark sweaters, so he’s on the other side most of the time.

Before I even had kids, I remember dreaming about being able to play hockey with my children when they became adults.

Since I was in my 30’s before we started, I wondered if I would still be able to skate by the time they reached an age where we could play on the same level.

Well, it’s kind of nice now. I just turned 60, my son is 25, and we were able to dangle some moves together that hypnotized the goalie.

Lily has mixed emotions about the end of the season.

On the one hand, I leave to play at 6:30 in the morning so it’s no hassle for her because she’s still sleeping. But on the other hand, now that the last game has been played, I just added all my hockey sweaters, socks and underwear to the pile of laundry … laundry just increased by a few loads this week.

Without hockey on Saturday, I’ll be able to get at things earlier on Saturday mornings – Lily should be happy. She’ll have more of my time to coerce me into projects and tasks around the house.

Then there is some vacation time up ahead and there’s not much room for hockey when the beach is taking up most days.

It’s a good time for a break, to focus on some other things, and do some dreaming of next season.

Here’s the thing: Different seasons or times of year bring different schedules and commitments. In the changes, your time with God can get put on the shelf. As one thing stops and something else starts, be sure that you keep your time with God – that season never ends.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What seasonal activity has impacted your devotional time? Leave your comments below.

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I Just Got Some Insights On Baking

I’m not often in the kitchen when my wife is baking, but the other day I got a little insight into what goes into baking.

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She was making cookies – ginger snaps to be exact. I’ve been eating her ginger snaps for years and I really never knew what went into making them.

I knew there had to be sugar because they’re pretty sweet. I also knew that there was molasses in ginger snaps.

But what I didn’t know is that it’s not just any kind of molasses that you put in ginger snap cookies. It’s fancy molasses.

To be honest with you, when I realized that it was fancy molasses in the cookies, I found it hard to believe.

First of all, I wouldn’t call ginger snaps fancy cookies. You wouldn’t find them at a fancy restaurant, or at a high class hotel. You wouldn’t even necessarily come across ginger cookies at any special occasion like Christmas or Easter or Thanksgiving.

It’s your run-of-the-mill, every day, blue collar, working man’s kind of cookie.

So why do they use fancy molasses? And what’s the difference between regular molasses and the fancy kind?

I was really puzzled about this so I did a little research and found out that my wife, though she bakes a mean cookie, has been using the wrong molasses in her ginger snaps.

There are actually five types of molasses and it comes directly from sugar cane. I couldn’t find out why it’s called “fancy”, but another name for fancy molasses is “gold star”.

Whatever you call it, it sounds kind of special, certainly more special than the others: Lite, cooking, unsulphured, and Blackstrap.

Fancy molasses is very sweet and I now realize that’s why my wife’s cookies taste so sweet.

If she used cooking molasses, which is a combination of Fancy and Blackstrap molasses, her ginger snaps wouldn’t be quite as sweet and I would be able to eat 5 or 6 more at a time.

… It’s possible that she knows this and it’s on purpose that she makes them sweeter to cut down on my consumption per serving, but I’m not sure about that.

I think she uses a recipe that calls for fancy molasses because the person who came up with that recipe had a bit of a sweet tooth.

I’m just not sure how to break the news to Lily that she needs to change the molasses in her ginger snaps. Though she sees me as a cookie eating machine, verging on a Cookie Monster, she doesn’t respect my culinary skills or knowledge.

I think the best I can hope for is when she reads this post she will be swayed to try a different kind of molasses the next time she makes her ginger snaps.

By the way, why don’t they call these cookies “molasses cookies” instead of “ginger snaps”? There is way more molasses in them that there is ginger.

You know, if we called them “fancy molasses cookies” I bet they would start showing up in snobbier places and events … I’m just sayin’.

Here’s the thing: We all have different tastes, likes and dislikes. That’s why it’s important to create your time with God in a manner, method, and way that you relate best to Him. There are no cookie cutter relationships with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you structure your devotional time? Leave your comments below.

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I Was A Little Overfed This Father’s Day

I’m feeling pretty stuffed today. This year Father’s Day really took a toll on me.

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For years on Dad’s day I would be treated to a special meal of some kind. Either we would BBQ steak in the backyard or we would go to a restaurant for a meal that would be easy on the work but heavy on the pocketbook. The festivities would be over by mid afternoon and I would still be able to get in my Sunday afternoon nap.

Well, the years have come and gone. We’ve done different things for Father’s Day, but this year had a new twist.

Instead of the family gathering around Father, Dad went to the family.

The festivities started right after church when I was presented with a brownie by one of our teens. All I did was be a dad.

As I shoved the whole thing in my mouth in one shot (just in case someone tried to sneak a bite), I thought maybe we should do this every Sunday. We could have different groups in the church present dads with brownies – you know, one week it could be the little children, the next week it might be the seniors.

Another week could be the wives … well, on second thought, maybe that wouldn’t work so well.

Sticking to Father’s Day this year, I had my brownie and next up was lunch with our son, Mike.

We met at a restaurant because Lily and I were going to our cottage for a day, and it would be easier to pick up and leave town after lunch.

We had a nice meal; I was pretty full after my triple decker club sandwich and, of course, the brownie I had after church.

Now if I had have gone biking after that I might have been ready for an evening meal, but all we did was sit in a car and drive for a few hours to Toronto to meet with our daughter, Karlie.

Those days of having the family all come together where Dad resides has gone by the wayside. We’re too spread out for that.

We arrived right at dinner time, but I didn’t feel like I needed any dinner. I felt that my lunch meal was still in my stomach and, because I didn’t get my nap, my body had put a stoppage to the work of breaking down my meal.

I could have skipped dinner at that point, but my daughter, Karlie, had been waiting all day for a nice meal with her dad and she was starving.

So out we went for another restaurant meal and more food. This time I even got talked into having dessert. It was seeing the people eating at the table next to me that talked me into it.

Well, when we finally rolled out of the restaurant, we got back in the car and continued on our journey to the cottage.

It was quite a Father’s Day … it was a lot of food. It was great being with both my kids!

Here’s the thing: Your Heavenly Father wants to see you, to meet with you, so much so that He will show up whenever and wherever you will meet with Him. Just make sure you show up. Don’t just take it for granted that He’s around and close by. He’s looking forward to sharing a meal with you.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What did you do for Father’s Day this year? Leave your comment below.

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Be Open To Something New

Yesterday my daughter got me to try something new, and that’s pretty amazing. What’s even more amazing is that it was food.

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When your kids are young, you are constantly coaxing, encouraging, coercing them to try new and different things. As they grow up, you do it so much that you never think there will be a time when the shoe is on the other foot.

I have to admit, I’ve had to take a few fashion tips from my son, and he’s gotten me to watch the odd movie he recommended.

But the other night was something else. It involved eating and I’m pretty set in my ways when it comes to that.

I think it goes back to the days when my mother tried to feed me squash for dinner. It seemed to be a staple in our house, like once a week at the very least.

I alway refused, but there was alway a tiny pile of it on my plate, with the understanding that there would not be dessert without the downing of the squash.

I tried to hide the flavour by mixing it into other foods like potato, but the taste always made me shiver as it went down.

As hard as my Mom tried, and as often as she persisted, to this day I don’t eat squash.

I don’t eat guacamole either. Well, maybe I shouldn’t be so hasty …

Lily and I were on our way to Toronto for me to catch a plane the next day. We were staying the night at our daughter Karlie’s home.

Normally when we get there, we go out to eat or order in. Karlie does cook but there never seems to be any food in the house when we arrive. I’m not positive, but maybe it’s just a ploy to get a free meal.

This trip, however, we left late so I thought we would just get fast food on the way. Not this time. Karlie apparently had food for us.

Still, we weren’t going to get there until nearly 8 pm, and since I was hungry when we left home, I thought about just passing on her offer this time.

But there was something about the offer that gave me the impression she would be disappointed if we didn’t eat there. So I said we’d be there for dinner, and hit the gas pedal.

Well, Karlie is into this clean eating thing. I don’t really know what that means … I’m pretty sure Lily washes the food we eat too.

When we got there, to my surprise, the bbq was on and the chicken was smelling pretty good. I’d been waiting so long to eat, I almost had to catch myself from salivating down my chin.

We were having chicken tacos which is not a stretch for me at all. I like hitting up Taco Bell for some grub sometimes. But this was a little different.

The tacos were basically chicken, red cabbage and that’s it. I thought maybe I needed some hot sauce or something, but there was none. The only thing to put on for flavour was guacamole.

But I don’t eat guac! However, since there was nothing else, and with a little coaxing from Lily, I tried it.

Crazy thing! – it was pretty good. … Look at that, me trying something new my daughter suggested.

Here’s the thing: Don’t get so stuck in your ways spiritually, that if God were to move you to try something new, you won’t do it. Always be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit in your life.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: What’s something new you’ve recently tried? Leave your comment below.

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I Took A Risk This Weekend

I took a bit of a risk this weekend that could have led to a big problem.

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For most people, they wouldn’t think anything of this, but for me, I had “worst-case scenario” in the back of my mind.

All I did was cross the border on Friday afternoon of the long weekend.

My wife, Lily, and I were heading to a cousins’ retreat at a cottage on Lake Ontario – that would be on Lake Ontario in New York State.

One of Lily’s cousins had rented a huge home on the lake and nineteen of us found our way to this place for a couple of days.

For us it was about a three hour trip, which is not that bad … it can sometimes take us three hours to get to Toronto.

But the added element of surprise was that we had to cross the border and I had to be back Sunday morning to preach in church at 10:30.

I had a choice: come back late Saturday night and get very little sleep, or risk a border crossing early Sunday morning and arrive at church by 9:00.

I had visions of having our car searched, pulling everything out and being delayed long enough to create a mini-panic at church.

I even told one of my elders that I was scheduled for praying mid-service and preaching, so if I didn’t make it, well … he was on!

On the way down we didn’t have any trouble at the border. In fact, I’ve never had any trouble getting across the border.

There was one time that I was driving a van with about six people in it, two of whom were born in Asia and Africa. I simply said we were going to a conference in Chicago, and the border guard said, “Have a good time.”

My internationally born friends couldn’t believe it. They had never crossed the border that easily before and said, “Paul, you’re definitely driving when we cross back over!”

The only time that I had a bit of a hassle was going to a conference in Ohio. The border guard asked me what was in my trunk.

I replied that there was a suitcase and my golf clubs. He told me to open the trunk. After looking, he came back to the window, asked me what my golf handicap was, and proceeded to give me some golf instructions!

Although these have been my border crossing highlights, you never know when they’ll just decide to rip your car apart.

I was feeling like the risk was worth the extra sleep so we decided to get up at 5:30 Sunday morning and make our way home.

The drive was pretty quiet; there wasn’t much traffic on the roads, and I was going over my sermon … Lily was driving.

The border crossing was no big deal; we were through in a matter of a minute and a half.

I think the key is don’t say much, and keep your words to a minimum (which might be hard for some people) so as not to give the border guard ideas to question you on.

Arrival time: 9:08 am.

Here’s the thing: It’s no big deal to take a calculated risk on something that might cost you some time. It’s another thing to take a calculated risk that might cost you your life. It’s an even greater deal to take a calculated risk on your eternity. Make sure you are right with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How secure are you in your relationship with Christ? Leave your comments below.

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Bald People Don’t Have Issues With Hats

I wouldn’t say this often, but there are times it’s better to be bald … like when you need to cover your head with a hat.

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It sounds kind of strange, but I’m having a bad hair day today and the only thing that is going to help it right now is a hat.

I know that some people struggle with their hair every day but I don’t usually have issues with mine. I have the kind of hair that pretty much stays where I put it in the morning. And for most of the time, that’s a good thing.

In the last ten years, I’ve noticed my hair has thinned out a bit, but it still performs the way I want it to … most of the time.

The good thing about hair like mine is that I don’t have to comb it throughout the day to keep it in place. My hair knows where it’s to go and it remains there all day.

When I was a youth pastor, the students in my group found this curious at times. They would come and mess up my hair just to test it. All I would do is give my hair a few quick flicks of my fingers and it was back in place.

If I went out into a wind storm, same thing. I would just run my fingers through my hair and I was good to go.

The downside with this type of hair is its strength: my hair stays put.

When I put on a hat, my hair forms to the hat and when I take it off, it stays that way.

After a night of sleep, often my hair needs a little coaxing to get into place. But if I’m just going out to play hockey, I will slip on a ball cap and go.

After hockey and a shower, I usually don’t put my hat back on. But today I did. My hair was a little damp; I threw on the hat and went home. At home I didn’t need the hat so I took it off.

That’s when the comments started arriving fast and furiously.

“Dad, your hair is wild today,” my daughter said with a laugh. She was home for a quick visit and after her vicious comments, I was glad it was a quick visit.

Lily chimed in and said, “She’s right, dear. Your hair is something else today!” and chuckled.

I had hat hair and I really didn’t care about it that much. I just wished my family was a little more supportive.

Later in the day, I was stepping out to pick up some wings for dinner. My son was home at the time, and as I went to the door he simply said, “Uh, Dad, you better wear a hat”, with a smirk on his face.

Lily just laughed. I slapped the cap on and headed out the door.

I just wonder how it would have gone if I had have made those comments to Lily about her hair.

Here’s the thing: Our minds and hearts perform much like my hair does. My hair forms to where I put it or what I put on it. Your mind and heart form to what you put in it. So if you want a mind and a heart that is forming to God, feed your mind the things of God: read his Word and spend time with Him in prayer.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What kinds of things do you put in your mind to form it? Leave your comments below.

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When The Conversation Is Out Of Your Control

Conversations usually flow from one topic to another at a gathering, but when the party is heavy on the testosterone you lose all control of the dialogue.

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That would be how I would describe our Easter dinner this year.

In my last post (read it here), I wrote about our plans for Easter dinner and said that in this post I would write about how it turned out.

Lily was sort of forced to buy a thirty pound turkey because that was the only size she could find at the grocery store. To save me from having to eat turkey for the next six months, she came up with a plan to invite some people who knew how to finish off a ton of food.

We invited two players from the Kingston Frontenacs hockey team, and two of our son Mike’s friends.

That gave us five guys 25 and under, myself, Lily and our daughter, Karlie. When it came to the food, Lily and Karlie didn’t stand a chance. And when it came to the conversation, the guys monopolized that too.

Easter is a time when our focus is on the resurrection of Christ, the price He paid for our sins and the amazing gift of a relationship with God that Christ offers us.

However, some of our company had just come back from an afternoon of riding quads on muddy trails, so naturally the boys needed to spend some time rehashing all the ups and downs of the episode.

Some of our conversation around the dinner table focussed on the more spectacular antics on the quads, getting stuck, who almost died on the outing and who made the biggest fool of themselves.

I’m not much into that sport; in fact, I’ve never ridden a quad before. I have, however, ridden my mountain bike on some pretty muddy trails, so I was all ears as we listened to the exchange among the guys. Voices and laughter seemed to get louder as the stories turned to the personal shortcomings of one and all.

At Easter dinner there is nothing wrong with diverting from the main theme of the day, but hey, we also had some hockey players with us who are right in the middle of the OHL playoffs.

Everyone wanted to know how they were feeling about the series and how they thought it would turn out. We analyzed the team and talked about old hockey stories that related.

Of course, on any hockey team there are some characters that stand out. And just like with the boys who went quading, there were moments in the conversation that focussed on some of the crazy antics that happen within a hockey club.

By the time dinner was over, there was a table full of stuffed people who barely had room for dessert.

Though we didn’t really talk about the Easter message – other than a quick explanation and saying grace – most of the guys felt like they’d been verbally crucified by the others over the course of the meal … not typical for an Easter dinner, but typical when you gather five young men around the same table and bring food into the mix.

Here’s the thing: When guys get talking the stories can become bigger and better. The biggest story in the history of the world, however, is the love God has shown us in sending His only Son to die on a cross so that you and I can have a relationship with Him. There is no bigger story!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you relate to the biggest story in history? Leave your comment below.