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The Secret Behind Staying Disciplined

There are people who are highly disciplined and then there are those who aren’t. Disciplined people seem to be able to set their minds or wills to something and follow through time after time.

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But there are times when even disciplined people find they don’t have the discipline to keep to their normal routine.

It’s like their discipline has vanished.

Now I’m no expert on discipline, and I am certainly not a highly disciplined person, but I am able to discipline myself to regularly follow certain rules, habits, and plans that I have set for myself.

For instance, I know that in the early morning I am the most alert, creative, productive, and focussed. So I get up at 6 am every day, and during those early hours I spend time with God; I study, I read and I write.

I do not vary from that routine, and I am able to discipline myself to work at these things daily. I don’t take appointments in the morning, and I avoid getting involved in other activities in the morning.

There are other things that I can discipline myself to do, but sometimes I just don’t have it within me to keep to them. It seems that I’ve lost my discipline and have no will power at times in the eating and exercise departments.

I need to stay away from junk food and fast food, and I need to exercise thirty minutes a day. Just reading that last sentence over, I should easily be able to do that!

But even though I have all the equipment at home to ensure I do thirty minutes of exercise,  lately I’ve not been all that consistent.

I don’t have the will to do it … or something.

Even though I know I’ve gained a few pounds, and even though I know that for my health’s sake I should be on this, the discipline to do it is not there.

The little thing in us called our will is key to turning this around. I believe our discipline is built on our will. If our will is set on something, then discipline is easy.

So getting your will to want something, like a healthy body, is the key to being able to discipline yourself to eat right and exercise.

Your will is based on your wants and desires, and if you want something bad enough, you will be able to discipline yourself to do what it takes to get it.

The only problem with that is we are geared for immediate gratification over delayed, long-term gratification. So wants and desires that I can achieve right now are more powerful than wants and desires I have to wait for over the long-term.

For me to be able to see my long-term wants as most important, more desirable, I need to be able to look forward to something immediately after I keep to my discipline.

… Last night it was pizza after I had worked out on the bike and rower for thirty minutes.

Here’s the thing: Spiritually speaking, when we find it hard to stay disciplined, when our immediate wants and desires (temptations) seem so powerful, we have additional help. We have God who will provide what we need to stay disciplined. You might not know what He can do to help you, but all you have to do is ask. Call out to Him, “Lord I need your help right now”, and let Him work on your will, your desires and wants.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do to keep disciplined? Leave your comment below.

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Strong Beliefs Bring Out Strong Emotions

Whatever we believe strongly in creates waves. It doesn’t matter if it’s politics or sports or religion, topics like these bring out emotion in people.

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I just have to say, “I’m a Toronto Maple Leafs fan”, and that will elicit feelings in some people. Right now, some are considering making this the last sentence they read!

… They may not have even finished the sentence … emotions are so strong, they could stop people in mid-sentence.

In my office I have paraphernalia from the Toronto Blue Jays and the Leafs hanging on one wall, and I get two very different reactions. The general consensus is the Toronto Blue Jays are okay; we are all on the same band wagon. But not so much with the Leafs.

Strong support for something brings out a reaction in us that we can’t back down from, that causes us to raise our voice or take a stand.

The most easygoing person turns into a stubborn, obnoxious, hammerhead when he is pricked by something he strongly believes in.

It’s just how we are; it’s in our nature. We can try to control ourselves when our emotions have been summoned to attention, but for the most part, they are sent into battle before we can call them back.

This week we elected a new government … Emotions get pretty high when you start talking about political parties and leaders.

In the heat of this political battle, there were many emotion-raising statements made by all the parties. But there have been a few that crossed over to another strong belief in some people; yet these comments didn’t elicit the kind of emotion from people that you might think.

Justin Trudeau stated that Christians need not apply for leadership in the Liberal party, and Mulcair has said that Christians are anti-Canadian.

Some of you are thinking these statements are not that bad; they are not the emotion-seeking missiles that other comments are, that they are really nothing more than duds.

But let’s just change one word in each statement: What if Trudeau said LGBT’s need not apply for leadership in the Liberal party, and what if Mulcair said LGBT’s are anti-Canadian?

Those statements would start a war! There would be accusations of homophobia, hatred, and legal action would be set into motion.

Emotions would storm these parties and would create such a tidal wave of negativity that retractions would be made and positive concessions would have to be promised. The focus on the election would have turned squarely onto these statements.

These statements made about Christians, though being hate language and Christian-phobic in nature, passed by without the firestorm that should have accompanied them.

Maybe everyone knew these were just barbs thrown out in the heat of an election. Maybe the authors of the statements don’t really believe what they said.

OR maybe there is little or no voice in Canada that would raise enough emotion to call out discrimination when it shows itself. Have Christians become like gays in the 50’s and 60’s, where they could be abused and no one cared or did anything about it?

Here’s the thing: It’s okay to become emotional about faith. It’s not different than the emotion that rises when we talk about our sports teams or our political party. Christians must voice their emotion, and not become complacent. Don’t throw up your hands; take a stand for what you believe.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you feel about the comments made by these two political leaders? Leave your comment below.

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Is It Really Time For A Change?

Apparently it’s time for a change in our country. That’s the mantra floating through the air in Canada this last month.

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I hear it in every commercial for the Liberals and NDP. It’s either time for a change or it’s time for real change. Even the media have been telling us the voters want change.

I’ve heard people say the Conservatives have been in power too long so it’s time for a change. The government is not doing enough for some people; certainly they want a change – a new government who won’t do enough for a different group.

Sure, this election seems like it’s all about change, but is change really what the election should be about?

When I go to McDonald’s and order a Big Mac instead of a Quarter Pounder, I might say that I feel like a change. I might not even have a reason for the change; I just want something different.

But that’s called a craving; I don’t need a reason for a craving.

It’s fine for hamburgers, but is it good for an election? Let’s face it, the parties who want change, who want us to vote for a change, just want us to pick them.

For the opposition, change is good because it gets them what they want. They may try to disguise it to look like they really want what’s best for the country, but the bottom line is they just want to replace the government with themselves.

If they can get us to believe we want a change, a hankering for a new party to lead the country, that works in their favour.

But hey, it’s not like we’re all pregnant with whimsical cravings for pickles and ice cream or a minority Liberal government with an NDP opposition on top.

Choosing a government means we have to think of what’s best for the country as a whole. That also means it won’t be the best for every segment of the country. Some groups will not get what they want.

The bottom line is the government has to do what’s best for the country at large.

That’s why I question the Liberals wanting to run a 10 billion dollar deficit. Sure, the arts will get more money, as will other groups, but someone’s got to pay for it. It won’t be the richest 1% either, because they have lots of ways to reduce their income.

It will be the middle class … it’s always the middle class.

The NDP think they can spend their way to a balanced budget. They will take care of the environment, pay for daycare, fix our medical system, and give you what’s behind curtain number three (hint: the car is never behind curtain #3).

So that’s why some parties want us to believe it’s time for change. Because if we thought about what they really want to do, we wouldn’t want to change.

There isn’t a perfect party, and there is no government that will make everyone happy. But if we focus on what’s best for the whole, a stable and secure country is what we all really need.

Here’s the thing: Every day we’re tempted to do what’s wrong over what’s right, and choose bad over good. When we give in to our whims and our desires, we’ll give in to the temptation to sin. We won’t consider the consequences, or the pain it might cause, just anticipate an immediate gratification. If we think through about the temptation instead of reacting to it, we will choose not to sin more often.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How are you going to think through your decision this election? Leave your comment below.

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The Real Focus Of Thanksgiving

Everyone knows that Thanksgiving is all about turkey. Well, it’s all about family and being thankful, but we do all that while eating turkey.

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Maybe it’s because we are thankful that, at some point around the table, the topic of stuffing comes up. Every family seems to have a few people who are really thankful for stuffing – not stuffing in general mind you, but their particular stuffing.

Theirs is the best, better than the in-laws, better than store bought (can you buy store bought stuffing?) … better than the stuffing you had last year at your best friend’s home.

Stuffing is always passed down from generation to generation. It’s never your stuff that you make, but it’s mom’s stuffing, or grandma’s, or granny’s, or baba’s stuffing. Notice it’s never Grandpa’s stuffing?

The biggest ingredient that I can figure in stuffing is bread, but after the bread it gets fairly specialized from there. Often there are some ingredients in the recipe which make it distinctive and more delicious than any other stuffing you’ve ever tasted.

I have to jump in here and make a confession: I don’t like stuffing. There have been a few times in my life that I’ve tried it, mostly because someone has begged me to try it on account of it being so amazing. To me it’s all much the same.

But in our house you don’t really make that view public, like I’m doing here. You see, anyone can cook a turkey and it will generally taste the same. But oh, the stuffing is unique, and it must be of an exact consistency with a taste that leaves the patron wondering, “What does she put in that stuffing? I’ve just got to know.”

But you also know that there will be ingredients in that stuffing that will not be revealed because they are secret. You would have to be locked in the basement, chained to the pool table for at least 35 years if it was ever discovered you had found out the secret to the best stuffing in the world.

Personally, I think stuffing makers think way too much about their stuffing. Let’s all remember it is just flavoured bread, jammed up inside a turkey for about six hours, while it gets all steamy, sweaty in there.

We rave over stuffing but nobody is asking to smell my gym socks after sitting in my gym bag for a day and there’s a few similarities there.

But that’s okay, keep your secret ingredients, keep your little smirk at the table when people try to probe you for information. I’m not going ask; I don’t really care. I’m not even going to try the stuffing this year.

I’d share some secrets in this piece but I don’t want to potentially be passed over for what I’m really looking forward to, that being the turkey. Because after all, when I sit down to the table on Thanksgiving, it’s the turkey, not the stuffing, that I’m thankful for.

Here’s the thing: Spiritually we can get sidetracked so easily from the main thing. We can focus on good things, and put a lot of our effort into really good things, things we have come to appreciate and view as important. But the main thing is that we are growing in our relationship with Christ. Christ is who we should be thankful for and focused on. If we are not focusing our efforts on being more like Him, then we are concentrating on good things that taste good to some people but missing the real focal point of our lives.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What gets you sidetracked from the main thing of being more like Christ? Leave your comment below.

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Final Goodbye To A Dear Friend

Yesterday I heard of the passing of a good friend and colleague, Ian Ross. Well, he wasn’t a colleague in the strict sense of the word, but he definitely was a partner in ministry.

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My introduction to Ian came 30 years ago. I had just been hired as the youth pastor at the church he attended, Beulah Alliance Church in Edmonton.

Along with a youth group, I inherited several volunteer youth leaders. Ian and his wife, Audrey, were two of them. At first we spent time getting to know each other, which consisted of mostly hanging out at restaurants after Friday night activities.

We got along amazingly. Ian and Audrey had a love for the students in the youth group like nobody else. It’s rare to find commitment on a volunteer level like these two had.

The most startling thing about our relationship, and their ministry with teens, was that they had already raised their family and their youngest child was just graduating out of the youth group.

These two relics in terms of youth ministry were only a handful of years younger than my parents – and I was 29 at the time.

Over the years I found Ian to be a quiet mentor. What I mean is he wasn’t pushy. He listened, observed and when he thought I needed some advice … well, I was all ears.

He was like that with the teens. He participated in everything the students did; they loved him and listened to him when he had a word for them.

We did some crazy things together over the eleven years I was in that church: staying up all night with the group when we had all-nighters, taking kids to the hospital when we went tubing, setting up the gym or the whole church for big events.

He got roped into all kinds of stunts, skits, and situations that most people his age would have had nothing to do with.

Ian, however, just rolled with it all. The thing that Ian did best, and did the most, was hang out with our teens, and interact with them. He encouraged them, teased them, instructed them, impressed upon them, teased them (did I say that already?).

He befriended them.

There is not a student who went through that church who didn’t like Ian, who didn’t respect Ian, who didn’t learn something from Ian … well, maybe Kurt … That one night cost Ian a couple of years, I think. At any rate, he was greyer, if you can get greyer when you already have completely grey hair.

For me, Ian was a mentor, a partner, a friend – oh, and a golfing buddy. I have only seen him a few times in the last 19 years but I’ve never felt that we were far from each other.

Ian was one of those friends you could pick up with like you saw him yesterday, even when it had been more like 10 years.

My heart is saddened that he is not here, so I will just look forward to when I see him again in heaven.

Here’s the thing: We don’t find a lot of Ian Rosses in the world. But God uses people like him. And I would challenge you, if you knew Ian, or know someone like Ian, to decide today that you will seek to make your life count for God like Ian Ross made his life count. Our world, our churches need more people like the Rosses leaving their fingerprints on everything and everyone they touch.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who has been a mentor in your life? Leave your comment below.

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Memories … Old, Faded Memories

Memory is a very powerful thing. It can access long stored information in an instance.

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Last week my wife, Lily, and I were in Toronto celebrating our wedding anniversary. We checked into our hotel, and when we got to our room, we found it overlooked City Hall.

Our vantage from the 33rd floor allowed us to survey a large portion of real estate below.

As we gazed out the window, my eyes gravitated to a spot just behind City Hall. From what I could see, it looked very different than I remembered.

“See that street down there?” I said to Lily. “I think it’s Elizabeth Street. When I was a kid we would eat there at the Nanking Restaurant on Saturday nights.”

It was the first restaurant I ever ate in. I believe I was just a month or two old when my parents took me for my first Chinese dinner.

I’m sure I didn’t taste a delicious egg roll directly, but I definitely got it second hand.

Lily wanted to go down to the street and take a picture of the huge “TORONTO” sign that was a remnant of the Pan Am Games held there just a month ago.

After we got down to street level and Lily had her picture taken sitting in the “O” of “TORONTO”, I kind of wanted to see if I was correct on that street I spied from our hotel window.

We walked around to the back of City Hall and sure enough, it was Elizabeth Street. When my family started eating at the Nanking, City Hall wasn’t even there. But now everything has completely changed.

The Nanking wasn’t there and it seemed like there was no trace of anything that I remembered. There was no Lichee Gardens on the other side of the street – just all new buildings.

But I wondered about the building where the Nanking was. It looked different. It was a government office now … the department of environment or something.

I was trying to figure out if it was the same building, but Lily thought the outside looked too new to be 60 plus years old.

I was still curious. I walked through one of the doorways, and my memory was pricked; it was foreign yet there was something that seemed to fit.

I motioned to Lily, “I’m not so sure this is a new building. I think the entrance was here and you could either go to the right into a smaller lounge or to the left into the large dining room” … which probably wasn’t as large as I remembered as a child.

Lil didn’t think I was right. There was a stucco kind of treatment on the building that gave it a 70’s look.

But as we walked past, down the side street, and turned to look at the back of the building, sure enough you could tell by the back, where there was no updated exterior facade, that this building was old.

Just as I remembered! I hadn’t accessed that information in years, hadn’t been on that street for 45 years, yet I could recall it all. Amazing memories we have!

Here’s the thing: Your memory of how God has worked in your life can encourage you, give you hope that He will continue – even give you determination. But don’t rest on just those memories, only use them to fuel knew adventures with God. Don’t get stuck in the past.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What past memory has kept you from moving forward? Leave your comment below.

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How To Get News Out Before It’s Old

When you hear about something can have a profound effect on how it impacts you. What I mean is, if you hear about something right when it happens, as opposed to six months after the fact, you process that information differently.

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Quite often when we hear about something long after it happened, we blow it off as not important or relevant any more … like if you heard that the government was going to remove all tax at the gas pumps for just one day on July 15 … and you heard the news on August 24th.

Today’s gas prices without tax would be around 55 cents a litre! It’s a far cry from the 34 cents a gallon I paid when I got my driver’s licence, but wouldn’t 55 cents a litre be nice right now?

Not only is that news irrelevant after the fact, but you’d feel a little annoyed just hearing about it now since you completely missed out on the greatest gas prices since about 1986.

On the other hand, your reaction would have been hand-rubbing, night-before-Christmas-like, if you had heard this information two days before the sale.

Not all old information is irrelevant, however; sometimes old information makes you think “what if”.

That’s what happened to me the other day. I was at my usual wing joint, picking up a pound of hot wings with Franks’ Red Hot Sauce (they’re the best), when I bumped into another customer who I knew and had played hockey with a few years back.

He told me that one of the guys we played with had recently died. I was shocked, but it hit me even harder to find out he had committed suicide.

Now I didn’t do anything outside of hockey with him, but we were buds on the bench. We always chatted while we were playing and in the dressing room. We talked about family, health and my work.

I probably played hockey with him about two weeks before he died. All I knew was he had to start taking pills for high blood pressure and we had compared medications.

I didn’t hear this about Leo until six months after he passed away, but it left me deeply saddened. I began to wonder if I could have said something or should have said something that might have made a difference.

I wondered if I had missed an opportunity to share Christ with him. I checked my calendar to see what I was doing around the time of his death.

This old news bothered me. It bothers me now.

This guy seemed content with life. He had retired just a couple of years before and seemed pretty happy and easy going.

This was old news that has made an impact, old news that caused me to think, “what if”. But it’s old new and I can’t do anything about it.

Here’s the thing: At some point the message of the gospel will be old news; it will be irrelevant. That day will be the day someone dies without Christ or Christ returns. Until that time in a person’s life, the gospel message is current and relevant. Who would this news – this good news – make a difference to today, or tomorrow or next week? Get the word out. Jesus is saving lives today!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who do you need to talk to about the good news of Jesus? Leave your comment below.

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The Secret To Getting Past Procrastination

I’ve discovered an easy way to tackle projects. I wish I knew this secret a long time ago; it would have helped me to get moving on school assignments and generally anything I wanted or needed to do.

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This year, in early spring, I decided there were a few things I wanted to do around our cottage over the summer months. There were five projects in all.

Five projects seemed like a lot when we got up on vacation and I hesitated getting started on any of them. But finally I decided to start with the one project I wanted to do most.

Deciding which project to start on seemed to be the key to get me going from doing nothing to doing something. … And that’s the kickstart you need to get a project completed.

When you are facing something big, like five projects, it can seem like there’s too much to do, or you don’t know where to start. You can talk yourself right out of doing them.

It doesn’t have to be many projects either. It could be one large project or just a complicated one. When you think of all that it takes to get from start to finish, it can be overwhelming.

… And that thinking or feeling can stop you in your tracks from making progress.

The secret is to not think of the whole, but to think of only the first thing. Another way to look at it is to ask, “What’s the one thing I need to do first?”

That one thing can be as simple as deciding which of the five projects you want to complete the most. For me, that one thing was not that hard and it didn’t even take much time.

It only took me about ten minutes to decide which project I wanted to do first. Then what followed was just as important: I decided what I needed to do next.

That seems to be the key to keep yourself from stepping back and looking at the whole project start to finish, and in the process getting overwhelmed again. You just decide what the next thing you have to do is.

What I’ve found is that there are usually several small, easy steps I can do at the beginning, before I need to spend a lot of time on the project.

And those beginning easy steps serve to get me going. By the time I’ve completed them, I want to keep going and I’m mentally ready to invest more time and energy on the project.

In other words, I’ve slowly got myself to fully commit to and embrace the project to completion.

I completed the first project, moved on to the second and, in the process of completing that, realized I didn’t need to do two of the projects. … That leaves me with one left.

And today I will do something very small to kick-start the work on that. All it entails is to take off some duct tape, open an access door and survey my hot water tank. That shouldn’t take more than five minutes.

Here’s the thing: When you feel you need to discover more about Christ, draw closer to Him, or sense your relationship with God needs to move to the next level, just decide on one thing you need to do to kick-start that process. Maybe that one thing is deciding on a time, a book, a method. Start there and don’t forget to determine what the next step will be as well.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What project have you been procrastinating with that needs a kick-start? Leave your comment below.

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Why Comparing Will Result In Renting A Storage Unit

This morning my wife went for a walk. When she returned, she commented on how many garage sales were happening in our neighbourhood.

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I casually asked her if she saw anything she wanted and she quickly responded with, “Look around! We could have five garage sales with all the stuff we have here! What do we need with more?!”

That statement stuck with me. I don’t usually think we have a lot. In fact, compared to other people, we don’t have that much. … But that’s the problem right there!

That’s why there are so many garage sales. That’s why most homes in North America could have a garage sale every week.

We compare. And when we compare, we often compare with those who have more, not less.

So compared to the guy down the street, I don’t have all that he has … so yes, I do need a riding lawnmower.

However, if we didn’t compare ourselves to others, if we just evaluated our own situations in terms of what we needed, we probably wouldn’t be checking out garage sales – we would be hosting them.

Most of us collect things. We need storage bins and closets and lockers and garages to house all the stuff we collect. Many people can’t park their car(s) in their garages because they’re too full of their things.

They might not use those things any more, but they have them just in case.

When I was growing up, we didn’t have a garage. In winter we would have to brush the snow off the car and scrape the windows. Since I’ve been a homeowner, we’ve had garages and I have been determined to use those garages for my cars.

That alone has kept us from collecting a few things we didn’t need. When in doubt, we’ve always asked, “Where would we put that?”, and the garage is always off limits.

Self Storage in the U.S. is a six billion dollar business, and we’ve all seen the kinds of useless junk that people put in them from shows like “Storage Wars” and “Auction Hunters”.

There is another factor that adds to this problem and it’s that we don’t just want more, we want new. We compare what we have with the latest styles or colours or trends. We feel we need to update our stuff.

We just put the old into storage – like my tie collection … Who knows? Maybe my fat, colourful Fred Flintstone tie will come back into fashion … Was it ever in fashion?

So we go to garage sales and we have garage sales because, when we compare, we need more and the old stuff we have needs to be replaced with the latest stuff.

Who’s in control here? Certainly not us.

… Maybe we need to make a trip to Bibles for Missions with a load or two of stuff.

Here’s the thing: When we compare, we usually compare against something better or new and we always come out on the losing end, causing us to want more or feel we need to update. Spiritually, we compare ourselves against the Bible, against God’s standards. And unlike the comparisons we do in our society where the targets are always changing, God’s standard stays the same. So stick to God’s standard, and you won’t collect excess baggage or be mesmerized by the trends.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How much stuff could you contribute to a garage sale or a store like Bibles for Missions? Leave your comment below.

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When Thankfulness Goes From Oblivious To Reality

In raising children, it’s easy to get the idea that your kids are oblivious to what you do for them. This week I learned that, despite the exterior finish of being absorbed in one’s self, underneath there is a high gloss coat of reality.

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I think what gets parents believing that our kids are not in touch with reality is because they start with a warped, small view of the world around them.

At first their world consists of just Mom and Dad. It’s years before they go off to school and begin to expand their understanding of how the world works.

Time is all about them … and they can’t even tell time. They do slowly learn the notion of hours and minutes and get it eventually – especially if you give them a digital watch and don’t try to confuse them with the big hand, little hand concept … let’s not even mention that sweeping hand!

Distance doesn’t compute with them either. They don’t get that something is far away.

… I remember when we moved from Edmonton to Kingston. It took us four days of driving to get there. You would think that being cooped up in a car for more than eight hours a day for that long would be etched upon the little minds of children. No!

A week after we arrived in our new city, our five year old wanted to have his best friend over for his birthday party. That best friend now lived 3700 kilometres away, but our son thought we should just pick him up and drive him over. When we said it would take too long, he said to fly him over.

Which brings up another concept young children don’t appreciate outside of their world of want – money. Kids have no clue of the value of money. To them the value difference between a quarter and a loonie (dollar coin) has to do with the size and sparkle of the coin and not its purchasing power.

When we commented to our son, who was three at the time, that we couldn’t afford to get him a certain toy, he promptly said, “Just put it on layaway”.

We had never done that before, so we questioned him on where he got that idea. He heard about it on TV and had no idea what layaway was except it seemed to him that he could get what he wanted, if we did that.

After years and years of living with your children’s concept that the world revolves around them, it’s difficult to perceive them understanding the bigger picture. You wonder if they will ever get to the place of appreciating the world outside of themselves.

Well, I got a Father’s Day card yesterday that proves they really do have a grasp on reality.

The front of the card read, “I finally found a Father’s Day card that really captures the experience of raising a son like me . . .”  On the inside, as you opened the card, there was a toilet with a $20 dollar bill sliding into it. The caption read:

“Amazing, isn’t it? Don’t think about it, and have a great day.”

Thanks, Son.

Here’s the thing: God gives us so much, and we so often forget to think of how much comes from Him – things like family, provision, health, possessions, work, rest, relaxation, abilities, skills, spiritual gifts, etc. Take some time to think about all God does for you and thank Him. It really is amazing.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What are you most thankful for today? Leave your comment below.