Next week I start my vacation. Until this week I have had pleasant thoughts about my time away.  But right now, this week, all I can think of is the list that’s in front of me.

I don’t always make lists, but when I’m under pressure or feel time is closing in on me, I start to make them.  Sometimes I use my smart phone and check items off electronically.  Sometimes I enter them into my computer calendar, so they’re scheduled in my day.  But when I am really under the strain of a deadline, I get out a pad of paper and I write them down.

I do that because there is little satisfaction in checking something off with a click.  But when you take a pen and scribble lines through a task, completely obliterating it from the page (but not carving a hole in the paper), that really satisfies pent up frustration.  I think that when you completely eradicate an item on your list it releases endorphins in your system giving you a sense of euphoria.  Well, that is, until you think of something else you need to add to the list. Then one just cancels out the other.

It bugs me that I can never think of everything at once, so as something gets crossed off other things get added.  It’s like the list that never ends (that reminds me of a song).  Like a child can’t have dessert unless he finishes his meal, I can’t leave for vacation until that list is done, gets crumpled up and thrown in the trash … usually tossed like a basketball into the garbage can.  (There’s an extra sense of satisfaction if it goes in with a swish!)

I should be dreaming sweet dreams of my vacation but instead I’m tossing and turning at night because of that list.  With the list ever before me this week, I can have no fun.  Even if what I am doing is fun, the list haunts me and calls me back to look at it, even stare at it sometimes, as if I could complete some tasks just by thinking about them.

What I do know is this:  next week, there will be no list.  No focusing all my attention on getting things done.  No worries of deadlines.  No finding contentment in scribbling things out on a piece of paper.  It will all be done, finished, complete, and I will be reclining on a beach, sipping a nice cold Dr. Pepper (I mean, bottle of water), soaking up the sun and waves on Lake Huron.

Here’s the thing:  In life, I need to stay focused on who I live for.  I need to keep Christ before me like this list has been with me all week.  Everywhere I go and in everything I do, Christ should be on my mind.  Christ should be involved in my thinking, how I process information, how I respond to life, and what I produce in life.

One day this life will be over and I won’t have to keep Christ before me – that will be an unforced, natural rhythm for me in heaven.  It will all happen in an instant, like the start of vacation.  But for now, I must work at keeping Christ before me, and dream of a time when it will all be as easy as sitting on a beach.

Until Next Time!

Pastor Paul

Question:  What keeps you from staying centered on Christ?  Leave your comments below.