advice

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Your Advice Is Not Always Welcomed

your advice is not always welcomed

It’s good to listen to your spouse when he or she gives you advice.

Though this is a very valid statement, it isn’t true all the time … but it was for me last night. 

We had been out for a walk and arrived back home at about 9 pm. As Lil looked up to the sky she said, “You should get your drone and take some video of the sky. It’s beautiful.”

I kind of balked at the advice because we could only see a small section of the sky and, though it was colourful, we couldn’t see the full horizon. What I could see didn’t seem that impressive. 

There is also another thing that happens when my wife gives me advice: I automatically challenge the idea. 

Now don’t get me wrong here. There are many times Lily gives me advice and I readily receive it and act on it. But when it comes to something that is my domain, something that I do and she doesn’t, well, that’s when I kind of push back. 

It happens the other way as well. There are times when I give Lily advice that I can tell she is immediately dismissing what I’m telling her. She will have many reasons or arguments for not wanting to follow my advice. 

It goes both ways. 

It is the belief that, hey, this subject, topic, activity, whatever, is my expertise. It’s what I know or do; don’t try to barge into my territory. 

I remember my father-in-law took a course based on a book his instructor had written. My father-in-law noticed a few grammatical errors on the first page and the instructor was quite appreciative. He even invited him to check the rest of the chapter for errors. 

Well, the next day my father-in-law showed the instructor all the red marks in the first chapter and it was clear the instructor was not appreciative of the advice given. This book was his baby; he’d put a lot of work into it. He didn’t like the fact that someone was pointing out its flaws and giving advice.

I think it might be human nature to resist the advice of someone who is poking their nose into an area that you feel you have ability in. 

No one likes the guy who walks by while you are planting a garden and tells you should really lay down landscaping cloth to keep the weeds out. 

Well, as it turned out, I had to put something away when Lily and I arrived home. She went into the house and I had time to think. 

As I thought about it and looked back up at the sky, I decided I would take Lil up on her advice. I got my drone and took some very colourful video and images from about 350 feet in the air.

The image in this post is one of them. It’s pretty sweet when the sunset cooperates and when you take someone’s advice. 

Here’s the thing: Our world is filled with advice. Often we just tune out the advice we don’t want to hear. But if that advice is correct and wise, we miss out and it can end up causing us grief. God has advice for us if we will take it. It’s found in the Bible. His greatest advice is to take Him up on His free gift of salvation that comes by placing your faith in His Son, Jesus Christ.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What makes taking advice difficult for you? Leave your comments and questions below.

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You’ve Got To Know The Right Guy

Knowing the right guy is so important. When you need advice or expertise, being able to connect with the right person is invaluable.

When it comes to making or fixing things around the house, I’m pretty limited.

I can do a few things as long as they don’t involved sharp objects. I’ve just had way too many cuts on my hands to be comfortable with saws and knives. … Hey, I’ve even done some damage in the past with a screwdriver and I wouldn’t consider it a sharp object.

In the past week or so I needed some advice on the kitchen upgrade we are doing at home.

Let me say upfront, I’m not doing much on this one; Lily is doing most of the work, which involves a lot of painting.

But we were also getting a new kitchen counter and that meant we would have to disconnect the water to the kitchen sink for about a day.

There were no shut-off valves under the sink so I needed another solution … unless we wanted to shut off the water supply to the entire house for over a day … No!

The guy at the hardware store said I needed a converter piece to connect our old style pipes to the new kind of pipe and then add a shut-off valve to that.

Well, I bought all the parts and it came to about $52. I thought that seemed like an awful lot of money for 24 hours of water!

I mean, for that money, there was no ride I got to go on, or show I got to see, or course I got to play. It was just plumbing parts … pretty uninspiring.

After I bought the parts I had a few days before I had to shut the water off, so I just kept them all in the bag.

The day before I needed to shut the water off I decided to go to another hardware store to see if there was a simpler solution.

I showed the guy at the store a picture of my present hook up and he suggested a threaded cap.

It was basically a plug that screwed into the end of the pipe. It only cost me about $11 and about 10 minutes to complete the whole task.

He was the right guy to ask.

After the new counter was installed, we needed a piece of wood to span the length of the opening under the sink. It needed to be 1 1/8″ thick, and if you know anything about wood, that’s not a common thickness.

I went back to the hardware store and the wood guy was totally unable to help me; he had no solution for me.

However, the next day I was talking to a friend who works in construction and told him what I needed.

Without hesitation he said, “You need 5/4 piece of wood. You have to get that at…”  and named the supply house.

Again, knowing the right guy made all the difference in the world.

Here’s the thing: We experience a lot in life that we don’t have answers for. We come up against things that we are totally unprepared for. But no matter what it is, Christ is that guy who can help us in our need. So often we don’t go to Him first. Christ is the authority and expert; He is able. Go to Him before you look elsewhere for help.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need advice and help with right now? Leave your comments below.

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My Replacement Blog

It’s not easy writing these blogs, you know. Sure, it’s only 500 to 600 words; some people can speak that many words in a minute or two. But it’s not the actual writing that’s difficult.

online-security

I remember when I was a kid. To write 500 words was a death sentence! It’s only a page of words, but when I was young I didn’t have that much to say. Plus, I’m a male and we can say lots with just a look on our face or a few non-intelligible sounds.

The tough thing about writing is the critiquing of what I write. Today I wrote a killer blog.  I thought it was one of my best, so I was anxious for someone to read it. I kept asking my wife, “Have you read it yet?”

I think my asking got her more intrigued with it, so she finally got on her computer and took a look. Everything was going well for the first 3 paragraphs. And then she stopped.

“You can’t write about that.” she said. I replied, “Keep reading”, thinking that maybe when she digested the whole blog she would have a change of mind. But after every paragraph she would stop and say the same thing.

Now, I don’t mind when she says, “Your grammar was really bad on that one” or “the punctuation needs some work.”  I don’t even mind when she says, “You should rephrase that.”  She has great ideas some times. After all, she does all the editing for my blog site.

The thing that I do mind, the thing that is tough to hear, is the content can’t be published. I spent some quality time writing my blog today and when I was finished I was proud of my work.

But now no one is going to read it. I wish I could publish it, and share it with others, but because it’s about a close family member, I’ve been instructed to keep it in the vault.

I ran into this problem several years ago when my kids became teenagers. I used to use illustrations in my sermons that were about things my kids did, or experienced. When they were young they loved hearing me tell stories about them.

But for some reason, by the time they hit about 12 or 13, I was finding that I needed to ask for permission if I was going to speak about them in church. Eventually, I thought it best to just leave them out of it. So for many years they have been missing from my sermon content.

Maybe they’re happy about it. Maybe they don’t do or say things that are as “preachable” as they did when they were kids. But one thing is for sure, censorship doesn’t just revolve around the CRTC (Canadian Radio & Television Commission).

Most of you would have liked my blog. You would have laughed, and been concerned. Some of you, who know my family well, would have had some follow up questions that you really needed answers to.

But unfortunately, you won’t get a change to read it. So just forget I mentioned my killer blog that I can’t publish. This will have to do as a replacement.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we want to do things that God doesn’t want us to do. He doesn’t force us, but if we continue, we might cause harm to ourselves or others. We can be stubborn and do it anyway, but the benefits of listening to God’s wisdom may save us a lot of heartache.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you benefitted by not doing something you really wanted to do?  Leave your comment below.

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The Doctor Is In

For the last several years I’ve been collecting watches.  I have several . . . actually I have more than several.  The watches I collect aren’t expensive or collector’s editions.  They’re not popular brand names.  They are cheap $10-$15 watches that I mostly get at a flea market.

Since I’ve been collecting these watches, I’ve been called the “Watch Doctor” by many … mostly my family and only after I told them I was the Watch Doctor.  If you say “Watch Doctor” out loud in reference to me, please pronounce it “Watch Docta”, it sounds better.

I’m not the Watch Docta just because I have a large collection of watches; it’s because I fix them too.  You see, with so many cheap, and cheaply made watches, there are always one or two needing attention.  If it’s not a battery issue, it might be the stem or the strap.  In order to fix them I need tools and I found a great little kit online.  So, if you see me with my little black bag, you’ll know I’m in “Docta” mode.

Not long ago I needed to change the battery in one of my watches.  For those of you who are laymen regarding watches, there are basically two different ways to get the back off a watch.  Some watches are the pop-off kind, and you use a special knife for that.  The other kind screws off.  There are little notches so you can apply a case opener tool to twist it off – and yes, I have that tool.

This watch had the notches so I got out my case opener for screw types and got started.  But I couldn’t get the back off. I turned the back one way and then the other way, but it would only move slightly and then tighten no matter which direction I turned.

Soon I began to get quite frustrated, and in passing, my wife Lily commented, “Why don’t you try to pop the back off?”  I gave her a look only a well-trained Watch Docta could give, as if to say “Whach you talkin’ ‘bout, fool?”  Then I kept at it.

After a while I began to get angry at the watch.  I would put the watch down for a bit and then pick it up and try again.  Nothing.  I got nowhere. Finally I got out my knife – because I didn’t care any more – and funny thing, the back of the watch just popped right off!

Those markings on the back of the watch were just decoration!  It wasn’t a screw type watch at all.

Here’s the thing:  The appearance of the watch indicated to me that I needed to take the back off a certain way.  Lily had no idea what type of watch it was.  She just threw out another possibility.  Her suggestion didn’t make sense to me because of the appearance of the watch.  But she was right.

Sometimes we get our mind set on something that we think we know about, and we don’t listen to God.  We think we don’t need His advice, that we know what to do.  But God knows better than we do.  Even when it looks like something we know, listening to God will give us the best way to proceed.

Until Next Time!

Pastor Paul

Question:  How have you been guilty of not listening to God when you think you know the way to proceed?  Leave your comment below.