The Real Focus Of Thanksgiving

Everyone knows that Thanksgiving is all about turkey. Well, it’s all about family and being thankful, but we do all that while eating turkey.

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Maybe it’s because we are thankful that, at some point around the table, the topic of stuffing comes up. Every family seems to have a few people who are really thankful for stuffing – not stuffing in general mind you, but their particular stuffing.

Theirs is the best, better than the in-laws, better than store bought (can you buy store bought stuffing?) … better than the stuffing you had last year at your best friend’s home.

Stuffing is always passed down from generation to generation. It’s never your stuff that you make, but it’s mom’s stuffing, or grandma’s, or granny’s, or baba’s stuffing. Notice it’s never Grandpa’s stuffing?

The biggest ingredient that I can figure in stuffing is bread, but after the bread it gets fairly specialized from there. Often there are some ingredients in the recipe which make it distinctive and more delicious than any other stuffing you’ve ever tasted.

I have to jump in here and make a confession: I don’t like stuffing. There have been a few times in my life that I’ve tried it, mostly because someone has begged me to try it on account of it being so amazing. To me it’s all much the same.

But in our house you don’t really make that view public, like I’m doing here. You see, anyone can cook a turkey and it will generally taste the same. But oh, the stuffing is unique, and it must be of an exact consistency with a taste that leaves the patron wondering, “What does she put in that stuffing? I’ve just got to know.”

But you also know that there will be ingredients in that stuffing that will not be revealed because they are secret. You would have to be locked in the basement, chained to the pool table for at least 35 years if it was ever discovered you had found out the secret to the best stuffing in the world.

Personally, I think stuffing makers think way too much about their stuffing. Let’s all remember it is just flavoured bread, jammed up inside a turkey for about six hours, while it gets all steamy, sweaty in there.

We rave over stuffing but nobody is asking to smell my gym socks after sitting in my gym bag for a day and there’s a few similarities there.

But that’s okay, keep your secret ingredients, keep your little smirk at the table when people try to probe you for information. I’m not going ask; I don’t really care. I’m not even going to try the stuffing this year.

I’d share some secrets in this piece but I don’t want to potentially be passed over for what I’m really looking forward to, that being the turkey. Because after all, when I sit down to the table on Thanksgiving, it’s the turkey, not the stuffing, that I’m thankful for.

Here’s the thing: Spiritually we can get sidetracked so easily from the main thing. We can focus on good things, and put a lot of our effort into really good things, things we have come to appreciate and view as important. But the main thing is that we are growing in our relationship with Christ. Christ is who we should be thankful for and focused on. If we are not focusing our efforts on being more like Him, then we are concentrating on good things that taste good to some people but missing the real focal point of our lives.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What gets you sidetracked from the main thing of being more like Christ? Leave your comment below.

How You Can Tell It’s Really Fall

Go ahead, say it, it’s officially fall. The weather has turned colder, we’ve lost the humidity, and I got my first cold.

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I was really hoping for summer weather to last right through to the end of October, but sadly the air has a feel of fall to it. Even on warm days, it’s a fall warm and not a summer sizzle.

Temperatures through the night dip a lot lower now. It’s brisk out when I’m leaving for work in the morning. The thermometer gets a bigger workout at this time of year with all its ups and downs. The weather is more unpredictable.

Conditions outside are one thing, what concerns me most is the condition of my body. I could blame it on the weather with its hot and cold effect, or I could blame it on some late nights and not getting the rest I need.

But I’m going to blame it on my wife! Lil has been saying she thinks she’s getting a cold for the last few days.

It’s hard for her to tell at this time of the year because she has some killer allergies that really put a strain on our Kleenex supply in the house.

But there were a few signs like the body aches and the congestion that gave it away.  Unfortunately for me, I didn’t know soon enough because I’m pretty good at staying clear when she’s under the weather.

That’s right, I’m not the greatest nurse in the world. My policy is if you’re sick, you’re on your own and it’s your responsibility to keep a distance of several feet from me.

I know you are probably thinking that I have a double standard when it comes to sickness, but I don’t. I don’t want people hovering around me; I don’t want anyone trying to give me special treatment either.

My motto while I’m sick is, “Leave me alone and stay clear”.

I’m having a little easier time living up to my motto today because Lil is away right now and I’m alone. There isn’t anyone around to stay clear from; there’s no one to offer special treatment.

Though I want to be left alone when I’m sick, I don’t like the fact that she took off after infecting me with her disease.

But there is nothing I can do. I have to accept the fact that I’m sick and I need to ride it out or try to do something about it.

My son has a cold busting solution that he uses, called the Cold FX bomb. It’s about a three day cycle of pumping your body with various doses of Cold FX medicine.

I don’t like drugs. What works for me is to sweat it out. I’ve got rid of a cold in one day with this method. And today is perfect – I have a day off, and I’ll be going to the hockey rink for a little pick up.

I’l wear a few extra layers under my equipment and hopefully, by the end of the game, the aches will be gone and tomorrow I’ll be a brand new man.

Here’s the thing: There are many things in life that can negatively influence us towards God. We need to be vigilant to keep ourselves away from them. But when we slip and recognize that we have been influenced negatively, we need to take bold steps to rid that influence from our lives. Today I read Psalm 119:7. The message was this: Keep an upright heart before God while you learn your righteousness … Good to keep in mind.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What are the influences you have to keep an eye out for? Leave your comment below.

When The Wind Is Against You

This afternoon I looked out our front window and the scene that faced me got me humming a song from 1968.

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I was looking at our 30 foot high maple tree, blowing in the wind like it was being beaten into submission by an angry UFC heavyweight.

It’s remarkable that in an instance you can be transported to a song you haven’t heard in dozens of years. Oh, the song? It was “Windy” by the Association.

The song describes two sides of the wind: there’s the “Who’s tripping down the streets of the city, smiling at everybody she sees” side of the wind, and then there’s the “And windy has stormy eyes” side of the wind.

Now, I’m almost certain that the song is about a person, a girl I would wager, who has huge mood swings. She can be great to be with, or she can be your worst nightmare.

Well, the wind today in my corner of the world has all the makings of a horror show … just add some dark skies, lightning flashes and the stage is set.

Earlier in the morning, I experienced the force of the wind personally. I rode my bike in a “Ride for Refuge” fundraiser. It was a 25 km loop during which I affirmed why I like to ride off-road.

For one thing, the trees make a great buffer for the wind. Secondly, it is so boring riding in straight lines with only the pavement and the gravel shoulder to look at.

And then there was the wind – yes, the kind of wind with stormy eyes. Some of the gusts were so strong that if you stopped peddling you would just stop, no coasting.

I wanted to keep about a 20 km/hr average speed, but when the wind was against me, I could,  at times, only muster about 11km/hr.

But when the wind was lambasting me from the side, it literally pushed my bike sideways, so that I had to over-correct my steering.

I made it though. Once the road changed direction, it was clear sailing and I made up for the time I had lost going against the wind.

When I turned into the parking lot at the end of the ride, I was glad to be getting out of the wind for good. The wind hadn’t beaten me; it didn’t put me into any submission hold, but it didn’t make me feel like I had won either.

I knew I had been in a battle and I had a healthy respect for my opponent. In fact, the next time I ride the road I want the version of the wind that’s “smiling at everyone she meets”. I don’t want to do battle again … well, at least not for a while.

I’m a little tired; I need a rest.

Here’s the thing: Life circumstances can smile on you or they can have stormy eyes. Though we all would love to have a life filled with smiles, like the wind that’s so temperamental, so are the situations we find ourselves in. With God’s help we persevere through the gusts against us, and we thank God for the tailwinds that propel us along. This push and pull in life strengthens us like muscles that are stretched and then relaxed. It’s all part of how God seeks to build us into the women and men of His design.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What kind of wind do you find yourself in right now, and how is God assisting? Leave your comment below.

Final Goodbye To A Dear Friend

Yesterday I heard of the passing of a good friend and colleague, Ian Ross. Well, he wasn’t a colleague in the strict sense of the word, but he definitely was a partner in ministry.

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My introduction to Ian came 30 years ago. I had just been hired as the youth pastor at the church he attended, Beulah Alliance Church in Edmonton.

Along with a youth group, I inherited several volunteer youth leaders. Ian and his wife, Audrey, were two of them. At first we spent time getting to know each other, which consisted of mostly hanging out at restaurants after Friday night activities.

We got along amazingly. Ian and Audrey had a love for the students in the youth group like nobody else. It’s rare to find commitment on a volunteer level like these two had.

The most startling thing about our relationship, and their ministry with teens, was that they had already raised their family and their youngest child was just graduating out of the youth group.

These two relics in terms of youth ministry were only a handful of years younger than my parents – and I was 29 at the time.

Over the years I found Ian to be a quiet mentor. What I mean is he wasn’t pushy. He listened, observed and when he thought I needed some advice … well, I was all ears.

He was like that with the teens. He participated in everything the students did; they loved him and listened to him when he had a word for them.

We did some crazy things together over the eleven years I was in that church: staying up all night with the group when we had all-nighters, taking kids to the hospital when we went tubing, setting up the gym or the whole church for big events.

He got roped into all kinds of stunts, skits, and situations that most people his age would have had nothing to do with.

Ian, however, just rolled with it all. The thing that Ian did best, and did the most, was hang out with our teens, and interact with them. He encouraged them, teased them, instructed them, impressed upon them, teased them (did I say that already?).

He befriended them.

There is not a student who went through that church who didn’t like Ian, who didn’t respect Ian, who didn’t learn something from Ian … well, maybe Kurt … That one night cost Ian a couple of years, I think. At any rate, he was greyer, if you can get greyer when you already have completely grey hair.

For me, Ian was a mentor, a partner, a friend – oh, and a golfing buddy. I have only seen him a few times in the last 19 years but I’ve never felt that we were far from each other.

Ian was one of those friends you could pick up with like you saw him yesterday, even when it had been more like 10 years.

My heart is saddened that he is not here, so I will just look forward to when I see him again in heaven.

Here’s the thing: We don’t find a lot of Ian Rosses in the world. But God uses people like him. And I would challenge you, if you knew Ian, or know someone like Ian, to decide today that you will seek to make your life count for God like Ian Ross made his life count. Our world, our churches need more people like the Rosses leaving their fingerprints on everything and everyone they touch.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who has been a mentor in your life? Leave your comment below.

Making The Most Of A Bad Thing

My wife, Lily, is always looking for things the two of us can do in our city. This past weekend we had some visitors staying with us and, to be helpful, she checked to see what special events were happening in case they needed something to do.

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Honestly, I think she was researching what was happening in the city to come up with plan for the two of us to do together. And, you guessed it, she found an event that was happening downtown all Sunday afternoon.

Usually I like to watch a little NFL football through my eyelids on Sunday afternoons, but this time I felt the need to give in to her scheme.

We headed downtown right after lunch. It couldn’t have been a better day for an outside activity – warm and the sun was shining.

The event was called “Streets Alive”, put on by the City of Kingston. You would figure that the city would have all the resources to put on a top-notch event.

In this case something must have gone seriously wrong. Not one person, but a whole team of people, must have missed their assignments to create this flop!

They had blocked off a city street for about one kilometre, turning it into a huge sidewalk. However, when Lily and I were strolling down the middle of the street we were pretty much the only ones on the road.

We had puzzled looks on our faces for most of the walk. At intersections there were officials to ensure no cars came onto the street. We asked one guy what was supposed to be happening and he admitted he didn’t really know much. He was just manning the barricade.

The street ended at a park with a sign at the entrance posting a long list of booths spread throughout the park. Unfortunately, we couldn’t see more than a few.

There were four food vending trucks which was one more than the number of booths that we saw.

We turned around and walked back … passing a few other people walking the street with similar puzzled looks on their faces.

The event was called “Streets Alive” but from what I could tell, it was more like “Streets Dead”.

I think I have an idea of what they were trying to do. Every year in the fall the city produces a magazine that lists all the various community opportunities, clubs and classes one can take part in. I think they were trying to do a live version of that magazine.

The only problem was the clubs, classes and organizations didn’t get the memo to set up booths, and most people would rather open a magazine rather than walk down a deserted street to a park with a fries truck and a fortune telling booth.

It wasn’t all bad, however. Lily’s scheme got us out of the house, doing something together, and I got some raspberry gelato. I think next year though we’ll pass on the “Streets Alive.”

Here’s the thing: Often we put the onus on the organizers of an event, thinking they better put on a great event or we’ll be let down and have a right to complain. We do that with church, too. Sometimes we don’t like the music or feel the sermon wasn’t good. But I believe if you are seeking to connect with God at church, He will draw you into any worship music and He doesn’t need a straight stick to strike your heart.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you make the most of a bad thing? Leave your comment below.

The Dilemma Of Making A Decision

I’m a little torn this morning. I have a day off and my dilemma today is, “Do I go for a bike ride or play hockey?”

It’s that time of season where I can choose. In a couple of months there will be no choice; it will be hockey or nothing. But today the sun is shining and it’s still warm outside.

That gets me in the mood for a good bike ride and I haven’t ridden in over a week.

But on the other hand, pick-up hockey has started and it’s been a long time since April when I last laced up the skates. I’m kind of excited to get back at it for another season.

On the one hand, there will be fewer and fewer opportunities to hit the trails on my mountain bike. The weather will start to be more unpredictable, and the shortened daylight will make it harder to get in a ride before it’s dark.

So I should really get out there and enjoy the trails while I can, before it’s too late and my bike gets packed away for the winter.

On the other hand, there is something about arriving at the arena in shorts and sandals, and the contrast of the cold temperature inside and the warmth of the sun outside.

It’s a tough decision to make on your day off when you just want to chill and do something fun. Having to make a choice makes it a little like work and less like fun.

You know, I probably have the time to do both today if I really want to. Though, I think I would get a little bit of objection from Lily, who would like to spend some time with me today.

If this was a work decision that I had to make, I would probably be praying about it. I might be conferring with a few other people to get their input. I would certainly make a list of pros and cons for each decision.

I might catch a cold playing hockey going between the extreme temperatures. Or I could get a flat tire in the middle of the bush and have to walk my bike out. I have to play hockey at a certain time, but I can go biking whenever it fits best with my agenda today.

The bottom line, however, is I’m going to get sweaty no matter what I do. It will also take about the same amount of time whichever activity I choose.

I have to get off the couch and out of the house regardless of the type of exercise I decide to put my body through.

And I win no matter what I end up giving myself to.

Wow, I still don’t know what I’m going to do today. All I know is I better make a decision before the decision is taken away from me.

… If I wait too long one option will be off the table.

Here’s the thing: Making a decision for God is important, because then God will work with you, steer you, guide and direct you. But if you delay too long in making your decision, there might come a time when the option to decide is off the table.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question:  What have you had a difficult time deciding on in the last three months? Leave your comment below.

Politics and Influence

Politics is dominating the news these days and there is no shortage of influencers out there. During election campaigns all the parties and all the candidates hope we will be influenced to vote for them.

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Influencers try to sway us to vote one way, rather than another. But what I find is that many of them are simply preying on our emotions.

The media is the biggest influencer and, though their mandate might be to report the news, they are all about emotionally influencing the population either toward or away from candidates.

It’s not the news they report so much as it is their presentation of the news they are focussed on giving us.

But this past week there were a couple of other influencers that caught my attention. Toronto was in the middle of TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival), and the stars were out to promote their movies.

Donald Sutherland and his son Kiefer were there, proudly proclaiming their love for Canada and their film. We consider them both great Canadian actors, so when they speak they have a platform. People listen; they influence.

But they are actors and actors give interviews, sound bites and quick comments.

Donald was asked about the election and he fervently criticized Stephen Harper and his government, saying he’s got to go. His main focus was on the arts, support and funding.

It’s a narrow focus he used to influence the million or so people who watched the impromptu fifteen seconds of passion and authority. But I’m sure he influenced a number of people.

Then later in the week, Wayne Gretzky – our Canadian hockey icon – was with Prime Minister Harper. He also was interviewed briefly and shared his thoughts about how great a leader Harper is and how well he has lead our country through economic uncertainty.

Like Sutherland, Gretzky has influence because he is famous and admired by many. But many of the people who will be influenced by what the “Great One” had to say, will be so on an emotional level. … They admire Gretzky, and if he likes the prime minister, that’s good enough for them.

We are being influenced emotionally to make decisions that should be based on thought, fact and reason.

We are being influenced to take the easy way out and make our decision based on what the news reporters say, or a celebrity dishes out.

The more we listen to the influencers, with their quick little comments, quips, outbursts, and passionate pleas, the more we short circuit the work we should be doing to really determine who we will vote for.

To be honest, I don’t share the same passion or perspective as many of the influencers out there, so why should I get emotionally charged by them in making my decision?

Here’s the thing: We are influenced the same way to response to God. We hear something, or someone we respect holds a particular view and we believe it too. Influencers move us emotionally but they should move us to seek out answers for ourselves and not just take their word. Influencers should motivate us to search the Bible for answers, spend time with God in counsel, contemplate the research of real experts (commentaries) so that we are influenced on more than just an emotional level. We shouldn’t parrot the sound bites of others; we should know God’s heart and follow Him.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you taken from someone else that you should investigate for yourself? Leave your comment below.

The Weather Conditions In My Home Are Changing

We are starting to enter the in-between season and it’s an appropriate time to deal with temperature change.

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I have been told that this year we may be a month behind in our weather. Because of our slow start in the spring, we got June weather in July and July weather in August.

That means September should be more like August … that’s out of the norm.

Though the temperature outside is changing, that’s not really the temperature change I am writing about.

I have to tell you that the temperature inside our home doesn’t hold to conventional, seasonal measurements either.

Here’s my problem: my wife likes the heat; she likes the heat outside and she is happy if it’s hot inside as well. So I come home from work on a sweltering summer day, and enter our house through the garage which is even 15 degrees warmer than outside. I’ve gone from hot to hotter.

Then I come into the house to the cool, refreshing air conditioned air – no, that’s not what happens. I come into the house that is just a few degrees cooler than my garage was!

I look at the thermostat to see if there is something wrong with our air conditioner, only to find that my dear wife has set the temperature to 25 degrees. When we add in the humidity, it’s probably closer to 30 in the house.

By next year our hardwood floors will probably be curling up.

I turn the thermostat down to 21 degrees because that apparently is the perfect temperature – at least, that’s what I’ve heard. There is a company called 21 Degrees Heating and Cooling and their motto is “Everybody is happy at 21 degrees”.

I want to be happy. I want the temp in our home to be 21 degrees.

After making the adjustment to the thermostat, an hour later it’s back up to 25 … she’s sneaky.

Sleeping is very uncomfortable, and Lil will admit it too, but it doesn’t convince her to lower the thermostat.

Now this is the thing I can’t understand, the thing that doesn’t make sense to me. And if anyone can help me with an answer that I can comprehend, I would be greatly indebted …

In the winter months, she doesn’t keep the thermostat at 25, or even at the perfect temperature of 21 degrees. In the winter, she keeps it at 20 and at night she lowers it to 17 degrees!!

In the winter I’m afraid to get out of bed for fear of frostbite.

What I don’t understand is, if you like it cool at night, why not make it cool at night all year round? I like to sleep in the summer just as much as I do in the winter months.

Here’s the thing: Temperature may not be conventional in my house, but it has the same beginning letters as temptation and temptation isn’t conventional either. As the apostle Paul said so well, “I do what I don’t want to do and I don’t do what I want to do.”

I don’t have a definitive answer for my house temperature other than standing guard at the thermostat to be sure it’s set at the right degree. And for temptation, we must be as vigilant in standing guard to turn it down when it starts to rise.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: When do you find you have the hardest time with temptation? Leave your comment below.

The Real Winner At Ribfest

Last weekend my wife, Lily, and I went to the ribfest in town. Anything with ribs in the title grabs my attention, so we go every time the tour stops in Kingston.

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If you’ve never been to one, you’re probably not much of a meat lover.

The main show is the huge structures that advertise each of the different rib venders all in a row.

It’s a friendly competition of who has the best ribs. Each vender has a table full of trophies, and their signage tells the story of which cities think they’re the best.

The ribs are good, but it really comes down to the sauce. We tried ribs from two different booths:

“Crabby’s” and “Smokehouse” and the difference was their own special sauces they put on their ribs.

Each vender hopes you will try their ribs and give them the best rating. They are looking for another trophy and more advertising they can put on their massive signs.

We’ve been for the last three years – the first two years involved a significant amount of rain which kept the crowds down and the atmosphere something less than electric.

This year it was sunny, warm and the place was hopping. Crowds covered the open field; it was tough to get a seat at a table.

But I have to say that, though all the signs and attention were focussed on ribs, they should really call it the onionfest.

In fact, I bet that’s what the “Colossal Onion” mobile fryer owner calls the festival – secretly that is … at the end of the night, by the warm glow of his fryer, as he counts his money.

While all the attention is focussed on ribs, the guy who has the biggest profit margin is the onion truck owner.

Unlike the rib venders who just sold you a half rack of ribs for $13 and a full rack for $23, the onion guy sold a blooming onion, onion rings and spiral fries each for the cost of $10.

I think the ten bucks was mostly to make it easy for the gentleman who was taking the money. This way, if the bill was purple, he just kept it and if it was green, well, he had to give one of those purple bills back to the customer.

The thing was the line up at the Colossal Onion was longer than any of the rib vender lines. People just kept getting in line to eat something alongside their ribs.

So you paid thirteen dollars for a half rack of ribs, and ten dollars to get a deep fried onion. The way I figure it, meat these days is costing a little bit more than what farmers are charging for the onions growing in their fields.

That means the onion guy is rubbing his hands in money … cha-ching!

It was all good though; we had a great time, and we’ll be back next year for onionfest, I mean ribfest 2016.

Here’s the thing: Some parts of life shine brighter than other parts. We get drawn in to the parts of life that are attractive and attracting. But there are parts of life that are more valuable – more valuable in some cases than the parts that shine. Don’t get sucked into living for what shines bright. Seek out what is most valuable and be sure you spend your time there.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you consider most valuable in your life? Leave your comment below.

Take a Mini Break To Recharge Your Batteries

It’s amazing what a mini break will do for you. Recently, we took the opportunity to get away for a couple of days and it turned out to be just what we needed.

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I wouldn’t say that all short getaways are relaxing and rejuvenating. In some situations they can add to the hurried pace we already live at.

When you take a weekend and go somewhere new, you usually don’t end up changing your pace of life that much. Thus you don’t experience the rest you need to recharge your batteries.

Don’t get me wrong, those kind of getaways are nice. They say that sometimes a change is as good as a rest. But when you get back to work and the regular schedule you keep, you still feel like you could have used a breather.

The reason is, when you go somewhere new, there is the urge to see or do that something new.

So by the time you get back home, you feel like you’ve been in a bit of a whirlwind, like it was great and all but you feel exhausted, tired, or hurried.

However, when you go somewhere familiar, some spot that is yours, there is a comfort in that place that puts you at ease, encourages you to relax.

We had two days – less than 48 hours – at our cottage, but as soon as we got there we were in chill mode. There was nothing to check out, nothing that was unexpected, no arrangements that needed to be made once we got there.

It was like coming home and, much like the way you feel after being on an extended vacation, it always feels good to get back home. Well, it felt good to be at the cottage again.

There was nothing to set up, no pressure, everything was familiar. We didn’t have to unwind; just being there unwound us.

We got up when we wanted to, no checkout time, no appointments to keep … except the self-imposed meeting with the beach. There was nothing hurried or pressing, just life in “slow mo”.

It’s like when they show you a highlight on Sports Centre in regular speed – it looks amazing. But when you see it in slow mo, then you see details you missed in regular speed.

That’s what it’s like to take a mini break somewhere that’s familiar. You enjoy the little details, the colours in the yard, the conversations around the fire pit, the quietness on the deck, the sound of the waves.

In a very short amount of time, the dial gets turned down and your muscles start to relax. Your heart beats a little slower and you feel like you’ve had a rest.

Here’s the thing: Life can get you all twisted up, all tied in knots, and spiritually you can feel disconnected or distant from God, making your Christian life a drudgery. The best way to get things back on track is to take a mini break with God. He and His Word are what’s familiar. But then do something out of the ordinary: spend a little extra time with Him, ask yourself new questions about the text, spend some time quietly listening to Him, change the location of where you meet with Him. Whatever time you spend with Him, make it a little extra. You’ll feel rested and rejuvenated if you do.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Where could you go to take a mini spiritual break this week? Leave your comment below.