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Another Failed Movie Night

We failed last night in our attempts to choose a movie to watch. You would think this is a simple thing, but it is never easy for my wife and me.

There are literally thousands of movies at our fingertips every time we attempt to choose a movie to watch, but still we can’t decide.

There is Netflix, iTunes, movies on TV and even the theatre if we want something brand new.

That doesn’t make it easier.

I don’t think there has ever been a time in our marriage where we both said, “Let’s see THIS movie.”

I don’t mean saying it at the exact same time, like a “punch buggy” thing; I mean both having the idea to watch the same movie.

We are diametrically opposed to each other when it comes to movies.

I like action adventure; Lily likes romance, and romantic comedy.

Do you know how few romantic action adventure movies there are? Someone could make a killing if they could produce more of these kinds of movies!

But having said all that, for Lily the action part really detracts from the thing she likes most in romantic movies.

I think the issue is how we approach movies in the first place.

I view movies more as an outside observer. My approach is more like I’m doing a ride along with the main character. I’m there with him, and I observe all the narrow escapes and harrowing feats, the bullets, explosions, yada, yada yada … but it’s not happening to me.

Lily, on the other hand, watches movies more like she’s in them.

There’s a new movie in the theatres right now called, “Jumanji”. I haven’t seen it yet because it’s an action adventure. From what I’ve seen in the trailers, the main characters get sucked into a video game and actually become the characters in the video game.

That’s how Lily watches movies. So when she’s watching some romantic movie with a particularly sensitive scene where the guy is saying something very touching to the girl of his dreams, when I chime in with some funny comment or mimic the line in a whiny voice, I’m not just mocking the movie, I’m actually mocking Lily.

She acts as if I’m saying that stuff to her and not the character in the movie … I think.

That’s why when she watches an action adventure movie, every explosion, every punch, she’s taking it on the chin.

When those movies are over, she’s tired because it’s like she just climbed up the side of a mountain, or parachuted behind enemy lines, or had to fight off some 7 foot, 350 pound guy.

That kind of thing can really drain you.

The other day I snuck up on her in the kitchen, and it scared her half to death. She said she lost three years off her life.

I hope those were just movie years and not real life years … although to her it’s all the same.

Here’s the thing: I don’t always understand how my wife thinks, or why she reacts in certain ways, but I do know that she loves me very much. The same is true with God. You may not understand why He answered your prayer that way, or didn’t seem to answer it at all. You may not understand why He allows some things to happen or unfold as they do. But one thing you can be certain of is that He loves you more than anything else. That is why He sent Jesus, His Son, to die in your place for the things you’ve done wrong. Be sure you’ve received His love by accepting His Son.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you handle not understanding someone? Leave your comments below.

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Why You Fail To Keep Commitments

The other day I was thinking about why it’s hard for many of us to keep commitments – especially the ones we make to ourselves.

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I believe people approach making commitments differently, and so for some it is easier to keep those commitments than it is for others. But it doesn’t have to be.

I’ve made a commitment to spend time with God each day at 6 am. Now I’m not perfect in that, but I would say that I keep that commitment most days and I’ve been doing it for years.

Someone else I know has made commitments over the years to exercising early in the morning. However, they have not been able to maintain that commitment over a long period of time.

My first piece of advice is you shouldn’t exercise that early in the morning – there is something seriously wrong with that concept! And in the words of Mr. T., “I pity the fool”.

But seriously, the difference I observed between my friend and I is not a commitment issue but how we treat conditions that are placed on our commitments.

To every commitment there are conditions that we either have to satisfy or dismiss in order to keep what we’ve committed to. And we deal with these conditions very differently.

You see, I get up every morning regardless of when I went to bed the night before, while my friend insists he gets 8 hours of sleep in order to get up early to exercise. So it is really the condition not his commitment level that determines whether he will follow through or not.

If he gets his sleep, he satisfies the condition, and he exercises; if not, he doesn’t. After he misses a few in a row because he didn’t get his sleep, it becomes harder and harder for him to keep the commitment. He eventually stops.

He needs to do one of two things with his condition: either dismiss it or satisfy it.

Some people have the ability to dismiss possible conditions so that they don’t get in the way of meeting their commitments. But for those who can’t do that, they must first satisfy the condition in order to consistently keep their commitments.

Foreseeing other possible conditions that may arise along the way is also important. For instance, what happens to your commitment if you are away on a trip somewhere?

If you put your commitment on hold, it will be hard to get back at it when you return home. You can dismiss the condition and keep getting up early, or you have to figure out a way to satisfy it while you’re away.

… And that will take some planning and possible preparation.

A major key to following through on your commitment is determining the conditions placed on the commitment and satisfying or dismissing them.

Here’s the thing: If you are having trouble committing to spending time with God, don’t focus on your lack of commitment as being the problem. Look at all the conditions you’ve placed on what you’ve committed to, evaluate them and either dismiss them or satisfy them. Then you will find you can regularly keep to spending time with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has made keeping commitments difficult for you? Leave your comment below.