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Unrealistic Expectations Can Really Leave You Deflated

We all have expectations, but unrealistic expectations are never met. 

unrealistic expectations can really leave you deflated

There are all kinds of expectations, ones we keep to ourselves, ones we share with others. 

Some of our expectations are based on logical outcomes from patterns we see. Some expectations are wishful thinking or based on a hunch. 

Unrealistic expectations are just not good.

Sometimes our expectations depend on someone else’s actions. But if we don’t verbalize to that person what we expect, well, it’s still unrealistic.

There was a time – or should I say there have been many times – that my wife Lily expected me to do something but never told me what she expected.

… Like the time I got ready for biking and she got all disappointed because she thought we would spend the afternoon outside working in the yard together. How was I to know that was what she expected? You can’t expect something from someone that they don’t know anything about.

When I was a kid, I pulled out my tooth and put it under my pillow. In the morning my tooth was still there. I expected the tooth to be gone and some coins in its place. But I had not told anyone I had pulled my tooth out, so how could the tooth fairy (Mom and Dad) know how to meet my expectation?

We can also have expectations that are just pie in the sky. They are not based in reality. The data doesn’t confirm what we are hoping for, but we expect an unrealistic outcome anyway.

This was the story of the Toronto Maple Leafs this year. 

Fans were furious and fed up with the team after they failed to advance to the second round of the playoffs. The team certainly didn’t meet their expectations. Now they are calling out all the responsible people who should be let go because of their failure.

I, on the other hand, was pretty happy with how the club did in the playoffs. But my expectations were based on some realistic data.

The Leafs had not beat Boston all year. They finished third in their division behind both Boston and Florida, and ended up seven points behind Boston in the standings.

How could any Leaf fan go into the playoffs expecting them to come out on top in the first round?

I figured they would win one game. They won three and they could have just as easily won a fourth. The Leafs took a team that was better than them to the seventh game and overtime. 

They far exceeded my expectations, but not the unrealistic expectations of so many other fans. 

If people question why they were in that spot in the first place, it’s a money thing in my opinion … too much money invested in four players. It handcuffs them from rounding out the team.

Leaf fans (of whom I am one) were expecting something the team could not produce. Yet we criticize the players and the coach for not meeting our expectations. 

The coach actually got them to play a defensive style of hockey that could win.

For me, I still remember their 1967 Stanley Cup victory and until they change the data, I’m not having unrealistic expectations about the club.

Here’s the thing: We all have expectations for the end of our life. If our expectation is unrealistic, our hope for the end of our life will go unmet and even be far worse than we imagine. God’s word has given us clear expectations for the end of life and, if we follow God’s plan for us, our expectation will be realized. Trust Jesus with your life.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: For what do you consistently have unrealistic expectations? Leave your comments and questions below.

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The Best Fans Are Die Hard Fans

A true fan is a die hard fan … that means they will cheer for their team no matter what happens.

In my last post, I mentioned that I would be writing two blogs about fans. You can check out the first post here. I wrote about how sneaky fans can be. They just show up and sometimes you have no idea who they are until they bring out their jerseys.

This post – like my last one – focusses on the Toronto Maple Leafs. It’s my team, what can I say.

They have fans everywhere. In every city and arena they play, you will find people cheering for the Leafs.

… And they will keep cheering. They will show up every time and they will take the abuse that other fans dish out. 

Leaf fans are die hard fans. 

The other night the Leafs were in Ottawa for a game, and the “Go Leafs Go” chant was definitely louder than the “Go Sens Go” chant.

The game was all Ottawa, which was surprising because Toronto is tied for the fourth best team in the NHL right now, and Ottawa is dead last. Yet the game looked like Toronto was headed to the first overall draft pick lottery instead of the Senators.

As a team, the Leafs know how to disappoint their fans like no other team. When you haven’t won a championship in over 50 years, you know there has been much disappointment. 

The jokes about the Leafs have circled for years: “Why are the Leafs the best golfers? Because they are finished playing hockey in April”; “It’s spring time – the Leafs will be falling”.  

I’ve heard these jokes over and over. And every time they lose, it just adds to the fan abuse we Leaf fans endure.

They have laws against physical abuse, verbal abuse, elder abuse … they need a whole new category for Leaf fan abuse. 

No other team has taken it on the chin like Leaf fans.

The other night when they played so horribly, I had a hard time watching. I had a few other things I needed to do, so I chose to do them in another room from where the TV was. 

I could hear when they were being scored on and I listened as the announcers commented on their horrible defence. 

But I just couldn’t get myself to watch it. 

Maybe that makes me a bad fan. But I’ll be tuning in to the next game with high hopes that this past week was caused by nothing more than team flu-like symptoms and that they are all better now. 

The thing is, all the disappointments, all the mockery that is heaped on Leaf fans doesn’t deter them from cheering for their team.

You see, there is this undeniable hope, this deep-seated belief that one day we will be proved Stanley Cup champions again. 

And no amount of hardship will dissuade these fans or deny them of the joy that is to come. 

Here’s the thing: This life brings with it, at times, much disappointment and hardship. There are dissenters everywhere, all around you. Yet, as a Christian, you believe in the return of Christ, and that one day the joy of being united with Him and all those who claim to be His will be uncontainable. Die hard fans never give up on their team and Christians never give up on their Saviour – no matter what the circumstances or conditions they find themselves in. Cheer on!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What conditions make it hard for you to cheer on? Leave your comments below.

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Fans Can Be Sneaky

Fans are sneaky because you don’t know where they will turn up.

For this post and next(click here), I’m going to write about fans – not the kind that cool you down, but the kind that cheer you on.

The fans I’m focussing on are the Toronto Maple Leaf fans. One reason I’ll focus on them is that I’m a fan and the other reason is that they are an interesting group.

Recently the Leafs made a western road trip, including games in Calgary, Vancouver and Edmonton. The most interesting thing about these games was the number of Toronto Maple Leaf fans in each arena.  

Everywhere the Leafs play, there are blue and white jerseys in the crowd. In Florida it’s understandable because it’s winter and mostly Canadians from Ontario go to the hockey games there. 

But there are Leaf fans everywhere. 

On this particulate western road swing, the Leaf jerseys at these three hockey towns rivalled those of the home crowd.

In each arena there were “Go Leafs Go” chants that the home crowd had a hard time overpowering. 

In Calgary, at one point, there were “Freddie, Freddie, Freddie” chants for the Leafs’ goalie. …This kind of chanting never happens where the opposing goalie is being cheered like a hero.  

It was unbelievable. 

In Vancouver, where the Leafs lost in overtime, the announcer commented, “Well, at least half the crowd are going home happy tonight.” … It’s pretty rare – or I should say never – that there are as many opposing fans in the seats as hometown die hards.

Maybe you could point out that the Super Bowl is filled with fans from both sides. That might be true, but the Super Bowl is played in a neutral stadium.

This is a unique phenomenon … perhaps because the Leafs haven’t won the Stanley Cup in 51 years. 

Some people say that other Canadian teams share the same kind of fan support, so maybe this is a Canadian phenomenon. 

But it can’t be that. 

… Sure, the Blue Jays are supported by fans right across the country and, when Toronto was in the American League championship a few years ago, the teams they faced could feel the whole country was behind them. It was like a whole country was playing a single city’s team. 

But the Jays are the only MBL team in Canada, so it makes sense that there would be fans across the country. 

The Raptors basketball team are the same. Many people are going to cheer for a team from their country first. 

The fan support for the Toronto Maple Leafs is different. 

In each city the Leafs play in, there is a team that the locals are passionate about. Yet, blue and white jerseys pop out of the woodwork and rival the locals’ passions and love for their team.

Fans may be sneaky, but with Leaf fans you can bet they are going to show up.

Here’s the thing: There are people all over the world who have put their faith in Jesus Christ. They are sneaky because you can’t tell who they are. They don’t wear jerseys with emblems on them in a certain colour. But you know that almost everywhere you go, there are those who raise their hands to Jesus. They come from countries where other gods are honoured, but they remain strong in their faith and in support of the one true God. There’s an army of Christian believers who are all cheering and praising our God in Heaven … Are you one of them?

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How faithfully do you stand up for your Saviour? Leave your comments below.

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Fickle Fans And Me Don’t Mix

In some cities fans are fickle; it doesn’t take much for them to give up.

I don’t get it – maybe because I grew up in Toronto, that hasn’t seen a Stanley Cup outside the Hockey Hall of Fame for 50 years.

I was 11 when the Leafs last won the Cup, but the thing is I still cheer for them like they’re going to win it this year.

… I figure I have at least a couple more years before I see that happen again.

But I know other cities – some that I’ve lived in – that are pretty quick to give up on their team if they aren’t doing well.

Those are fickle fans. A real fan is a fan through the good and the bad, the long and the short haul. The bottom line is you don’t turn on your team.

That’s what’s got me concerned about the city I live in right now. What kind of fans live here?

Some are whiners, some are only good time fans, some are complainers. Not many, apparently, are true fans.

The biggest hockey action in my town is OHL hockey – these are the kids that are feeding the pro ranks.

In my town, the Kingston Frontenacs are the top bill.

Last year the team made a run in the playoffs but fell short. This year was a building year. The team wasn’t supposed to do much, and were expected to finish near or at the bottom of the league.

Well, they surprised everyone – maybe even themselves. They ended up 4th in their division, giving them home ice advantage in the first round of the playoffs.

Not too shabby in my books.

They did all this, mind you, with 13 sixteen and seventeen year olds, 4 of them on defence. That’s on a roaster of 23 guys.

To say they overachieved is a bit of an understatement!

But that doesn’t seem good enough for Kingstonians. The first two games of the playoffs saw smaller attendance numbers than an average regular season game this year … which was a far cry from last year’s attendance.

People blame it on many things: past experiences, higher ticket prices, waiting to see if they make it to the next round, and they don’t like where the arena was built. These are all excuses of fickle fans.

It’s almost like the fans said, “You had your chance last year and you blew it. We’re not doing that again.”

There are some people who wish for the good old days. They liked watching hockey then; those were real teams.

I remember my dad, at about age 70, was asked by another senior if he was going to attend a seniors’ service at his church.

He said he didn’t think he would go. The man replied, “We are going to sing hymns like the good old days.”

My dad’s reply was, “The good old days were not that good.”

We build the past up to be bigger than it was. The present is where it is at. Be a fan, not some fickle version of it!

Here’s the thing: When you make a commitment to Jesus Christ, it’s not some half-hearted, in the good times only commitment. You are trusting your life now and forever to Him and you need to give Him your all – not some whiny, looking back at the past, fickle version of it. Live your commitment.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How would you describe a real commitment? Leave your comments below.

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Why Fans Aren’t Worth Much – Part 2

In my last blog (click to read), I compared sports fans to recycle trash. Team owners and players consider fans to be more valuable than trash, but not much more.

Leaf fans

Just like we treat recycle items a little better than regular garbage, fans are treated likewise. The bottom line, however, is they’re still trash.

Some of you have been wondering when I was going to show my colours and now’s the time.  I’ve been a Toronto Maple Leaf fan for most of my life. I grew up in Toronto, so the team is engrained deep within me.

I was 11 years old when Toronto last won the Stanley cup in 1967. I’ll be 58 this year.

My kids, now in their 20’s, have never witnessed the Leafs win the cup. They’ve never seen them win the conference finals. But they have observed the Leafs missing the playoffs 12 times in the past 25 years. That’s half the time if you’re counting (excluding the 04/05 lock out year).

Last year the Leafs made the playoffs for the first time in 8 years. They did great, almost dumping the future Stanley Cup champions to the curb in the first round.

Fans had high hopes, and were in full support of this team. This year looked promising; the team was solid. They were playoff-bound right through until after the Olympic break.

There have been a couple of injuries since then that have hurt them, but that’s not the real problem. Sure Reimer let in 19 goals in five games, but Bernier has let in 12 in the last 3 games. Goaltending is not the issue.

The problem is morale. The Leafs are not playing like they did before the break. There’s no urgency in their game. No desire to win. They have no drive to make the playoffs this year.

What there is is a great deal of unrest in that organization right now. How this unrest surfaces is in treating the fans like they are recycle garbage.

While the team is fighting it out amongst each other or with the coaches in the dressing room, every night on the ice they are just taking the blue box to the curb for pick up the next morning.

Toronto should be the cleanest city in the world; they have the garbage picked up about three times a week!

Someone needs to shake everyone in that organization and get them looking at what’s really important. It’s not who’s being treated poorly, or who’s right or wrong. It’s the fans! Treat them like they belong in the house and not in a recycle bin on the side of the street!

Someone on the team needs to say, “Let’s give these fans what they want. Let’s forget our beefs while we are on the ice. Let’s remember the fans are still supporting us, the product.”

You don’t put the Cheerios box in the recycle bin when there are still Cheerios in it. The team needs to rally around the fans for the fans. Sports fans are the team’s most valuable resource.

My beef and my rant is about my team the Toronto Maple Leafs. But listen, your team is just one internal argument away from treating you as recycle trash, too.

Here’s the thing: When our morale is low, often we treat God like recycle trash. We ignore Him to focus on our issues. We blame Him for the state we are in. Instead, seek His support and encouragement and help. God is your most valuable resource.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How can you make God your most valuable resource?

I’d love to hear from you; you can leave a comment below.

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Why Fans Aren’t Worth Much – Part 1

I’ve come to the conclusion that sports fans are much like “recycle trash” in the big picture of sport. Recycle trash is more precious or valuable that regular trash, but it’s still trash.

recycling

Garbage that is destined for one of the many bins we have in our households is treated with slightly more respect than straight garbage.

In our city we have grey boxes for paper and cardboard, blue boxes for cans and plastic, and green bins for food refuse. What’s left just gets tossed into the garbage can.

The recycle trash we treat with some care. We either fold it up nicely, rinse it off or out, and collect it in a special container before we put it in the bin.

Regular trash doesn’t get any of that consideration. It just gets tossed.

In sports, the teams like the fans to come to games and cheer them on. And because of that, teams care for them in certain ways.

In hockey the players skate around the rink at the end of the game with their sticks in the air, paying tribute to the fans who stuck with them and served them with their collective noise.

The treatment is not unlike styrofoam that held a few pounds of ground beef. We take care to rinse off the meat residue, making the styrofoam all clean, and then place it orderly in the blue or grey box – frankly, I can’t remember which box it goes in. But we stack it up in one of those boxes.

Teams will also show up to community events to raise money, show they care, sign autographs – it’s pretty touching at times. The fans feel like they are cardboard that hasn’t been crushed but rather neatly flattened, then folded to the proper size to fit nicely into the grey bin.

Owners of teams will extend perks, incentives and deals to the fans to encourage them to watch games in large arenas, all with the goal of supporting the fans and making them feel special.

I don’t know how many times I’ve taken plastic bags and made sure they are clean and put them all in a big plastic bag and placed them in the blue bin, with the paper and cardboard – go figure that one!

It’s just nice to have all those bags together in one place … and you can really stuff a lot of little bags in one big bag.

Sports fans are just like recycle trash. But they’re still considered trash. It shouldn’t be. The fans are the ones that make it possible to fill the arenas. The fans are the ones that put money in the owners’ pockets and, in turn, into the players’ hands.

The fans make it possible for someone to do something they are good at and love professionally. Without the fans, those guys would be playing at 11 pm in broken-down arenas, with their wives already home in bed, just like the rest of us.

Sports fans aren’t really recycle trash; they’re just treated as such by the sports teams they cheer for. To be continued . . .

Here’s the thing:  As much as we think life is all about us, it is really all about God. We are here to give Him glory in all that we do. However, many of us think life – our life – is all about us, so we treat God like He is secondary. … Not recycle trash – no, much better than that – we honour Him at times. But I wonder if He feels like He’s being treated like recycle trash … just a little better than regular garbage.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How may you have made God feel like recycle trash?

I’d love to hear from you; you can leave a comment below.