Hockey

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Unrealistic Expectations Can Really Leave You Deflated

We all have expectations, but unrealistic expectations are never met. 

unrealistic expectations can really leave you deflated

There are all kinds of expectations, ones we keep to ourselves, ones we share with others. 

Some of our expectations are based on logical outcomes from patterns we see. Some expectations are wishful thinking or based on a hunch. 

Unrealistic expectations are just not good.

Sometimes our expectations depend on someone else’s actions. But if we don’t verbalize to that person what we expect, well, it’s still unrealistic.

There was a time – or should I say there have been many times – that my wife Lily expected me to do something but never told me what she expected.

… Like the time I got ready for biking and she got all disappointed because she thought we would spend the afternoon outside working in the yard together. How was I to know that was what she expected? You can’t expect something from someone that they don’t know anything about.

When I was a kid, I pulled out my tooth and put it under my pillow. In the morning my tooth was still there. I expected the tooth to be gone and some coins in its place. But I had not told anyone I had pulled my tooth out, so how could the tooth fairy (Mom and Dad) know how to meet my expectation?

We can also have expectations that are just pie in the sky. They are not based in reality. The data doesn’t confirm what we are hoping for, but we expect an unrealistic outcome anyway.

This was the story of the Toronto Maple Leafs this year. 

Fans were furious and fed up with the team after they failed to advance to the second round of the playoffs. The team certainly didn’t meet their expectations. Now they are calling out all the responsible people who should be let go because of their failure.

I, on the other hand, was pretty happy with how the club did in the playoffs. But my expectations were based on some realistic data.

The Leafs had not beat Boston all year. They finished third in their division behind both Boston and Florida, and ended up seven points behind Boston in the standings.

How could any Leaf fan go into the playoffs expecting them to come out on top in the first round?

I figured they would win one game. They won three and they could have just as easily won a fourth. The Leafs took a team that was better than them to the seventh game and overtime. 

They far exceeded my expectations, but not the unrealistic expectations of so many other fans. 

If people question why they were in that spot in the first place, it’s a money thing in my opinion … too much money invested in four players. It handcuffs them from rounding out the team.

Leaf fans (of whom I am one) were expecting something the team could not produce. Yet we criticize the players and the coach for not meeting our expectations. 

The coach actually got them to play a defensive style of hockey that could win.

For me, I still remember their 1967 Stanley Cup victory and until they change the data, I’m not having unrealistic expectations about the club.

Here’s the thing: We all have expectations for the end of our life. If our expectation is unrealistic, our hope for the end of our life will go unmet and even be far worse than we imagine. God’s word has given us clear expectations for the end of life and, if we follow God’s plan for us, our expectation will be realized. Trust Jesus with your life.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: For what do you consistently have unrealistic expectations? Leave your comments and questions below.

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Twice Is Too Many Times For Me

They say lightning never strikes twice, but I’ve heard of people getting struck by lightning more than once.

twice is too many times for me

I remember golfing with a buddy when we were on the 16th hole down in a valley when the warning siren blared throughout the whole course. With our lightning rods – I mean umbrellas – raised, my friend Mike began walking up the steep cart path. 

I turned to say something to him and saw a flash of light that almost blinded me. The worst part, however, was the sound of the thunder that boomed about a second after the lightning. 

We knew it was close, looked at each other, said in unison, “Let’s get out of here!” and started running. 

No one wants to be hit by lightning, or even get close to it … but it does happen. 

In Canada there are an average of over 2 million lightning strikes per year, yet only 100 to 150 people are injured each year by lightning. That tells me that lightning is not all that accurate. Still, it claims about 9 or 10 lives per year. 

It’s rare to be struck by lightning more than once, but don’t tell that to Roy Sullivan. He was struck seven times!

Well, my golfing lightning story was the closest I’ve ever come, but something happened the other day that reminded me of being struck by lightning twice. 

When I was in college I got injured playing hockey. I was skating up the ice with a good head of steam and scooped at the puck along the boards. The plastic strip at the base of the boards had a join right where the blade of my stick made contact with the puck. The join wasn’t even and acted as a full stop for my stick. 

I drove the butt end of my stick into my upper thigh and it lifted me right off the ice, until the stick broke in half and I came crashing down. 

It was probably the most pain I’ve experienced in my life.

I’ll never forget it. I had clipped a small artery, just missing the main artery in my leg by a couple of millimetres. The result was a hematoma about twice the size of a golf ball that appeared in mere seconds. 

I ended up having surgery to tie off the artery and drain the blood. 

Fast forward 40 years later. … Last week I was skating with the puck and went to go around a guy right by the boards. It was tight, yet somehow the blade of my stick wedged into a gate – how it got in there, still amazes me.

All I know is the butt end of my stick hit my upper thigh and I was flying in the air.  

I had a déjà vu moment as I landed on the ice.

Thankfully it wasn’t serious this time, just some bruising and tenderness for a few days.

All I can say is, I hope I’m not the Roy Sullivan of hockey rinks.

Here’s the thing: There are some things that we don’t want to have to experience twice, or want another chance at. But God gives us multiple chances to respond to His invitation to begin a relationship with Him through His son, Jesus Christ. Don’t wait for another chance to come along. Put your faith in Christ today.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is something you hope you will not experience again? Leave your comments and questions below.

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A Burn Can Multiply To Become A Double Burn

Have you ever been burned by the actions of others, only to experience a second burn from that first action?

a burn can multiply to become a double burn

It happens. 

Maybe you have been part of a struggling company that got taken over by a competitor. The first burn was when you had to adjust to a new system, a new boss. But the second burn came when the amalgamation made your position redundant and you were let go. That’s a double burn.

I remember driving up north when a deer hit my car. It was an older car, but still drivable. But when I took it to the insurance claim centre the next week, they wrote the car off. They told me I couldn’t drive it. I replied that I’d already driven it over 550 kilometres since the accident! 

It didn’t change their minds. They just gave me a lift to the car rental place. 

I got burned by having my car damaged through no fault of my own. Then the insurance company gave me less than what I needed to replace my car. I got burned twice in that deal. 

Getting burned twice is being put out in two different ways from one action. 

Sometimes we can be the cause of our misfortune, but often we are not. And that’s what makes that double burn so annoying. I was not responsible for it, but it happened to me … twice.

So this is what happened to me the other day … 

I play hockey on the military base in my town. For that I pay for a gym membership and it includes pick up hockey at the rink. 

I purchase a pass for a few months at a time and only renew for the time I need to finish out the hockey season. I don’t use the gym year-round so I only need my membership from October to April.

Well, my pass was ending and so I went in to top it up until April. All was good. Then I went and played hockey. 

After hockey was over, one guy said, “There will be no pick up hockey next week due to the strike.” 

I immediately thought, “Wait! I just paid for my membership pass two hours ago.” 

Not being in the military, I didn’t know anything about the impending strike of the civilian support staff. 

I understand their complaint. They don’t get paid very much and these days that’s got to be difficult. I am sympathetic to their cause, but I don’t like them taking my money for a membership without informing me about the impending strike. 

That was Friday and immediately after the weekend I would not be able to use my membership for who knows how long.

If I would have paid after the strike it would have cost me less. But now, not only am I missing out on hockey because of the strike, I paid more than I needed to … a double burn!

I hope my wasted fee ends up in a support worker’s pocket. 

Here’s the thing: Having a relationship with Christ has a double benefit. You have Him in your life now to help you, guide you, comfort you, but you also will experience eternity with Him. The contrary is also true: no relationship with Christ means you miss out now AND for eternity. It’s the worst double burn you can experience. Don’t wait to put your faith in Christ. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you experienced a double burn? Leave your comments and questions below.

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Your Agenda May Not Be Your Agenda At All

It seems like everyone has an agenda for you, whether you like it or not.

your agenda may not be your agenda at all

People like to impose their agenda on you and sometimes they don’t even realize they’re doing it. 

I went to an eye clinic the other day to follow up on some tests I had had concerning an issue that resulted from my on-ice collision several weeks ago. (You can read about it here).

I was there to get the results from about seven tests they had done on my eyes at the previous appointment.

I was a little concerned going in to see the ophthalmologist because I didn’t think I had done very well on a few of the tests. But when I sat with the eye doctor he really had a different agenda than to give me feedback on the tests.

The eye specialist is no different from anyone else.

When I say to Lily, “I’m going to the store”, her response is always the same – “What store are you going to?” And I know that question means trouble. Either she wants to know where I’m going so that I can pick something up for her, or she wants to come with me.

No matter her response, there is always an agenda in her answer. 

If she wants to come with me, that most likely nixes my agenda for my shopping trip. Somehow the trip becomes Lily’s trip with me just tagging along. We end up going into several women’s clothing stores or a home furnishing store, or stopping at the grocery store for a few items we can’t do without.

And all I wanted was a shirt! So much for my agenda.

Well that’s how I felt at the eye doctor’s. 

He told me my eye structure was similar to one with glaucoma, not that I have or will necessarily ever get it. He wanted me to see an optometrist on a yearly basis so that they could monitor my eye health as I age.

I was kind of discouraged by all that. I just wanted to know how I did on the tests and how my eyes are now. It had been about 27 years since I’d been to an eye doctor and discovered I needed reading glasses. Now, all of a sudden, I was being told I need to be monitored for potential eye issues.  

Feeling a little frustrated, I asked the doc, “How are my eyes now? How did I do on the tests?”

His response was, “Your eyes are very good; you did really well on the tests.”  

There was one I was particularly concerned about and he said I did perfect on that test. 

I walked out of the clinic that day a little miffed that I would be called in a year for another appointment. If I hadn’t have asked, I would not have found out what I wanted to know.

The appointment was all the eye doctor’s agenda, not mine.

Here’s the thing: We all have an agenda for our own lives and an idea of what we think is best for it. There are also other people who will seek to impose their agendas on you. But God has an agenda for you. His agenda is worth joining because God knows you and what’s best for you so His agenda will lead you to the best outcome in the long run. Put you faith in Christ to link with God’s agenda. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Whose agenda are you following these days? Leave you comments and questions below.

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Confidence Is Fragile And Can Evaporate Easily

It is sometimes the little things that give you confidence in someone … or not. 

confidence is fragile and can evaporate easily

In my last post I wrote about my experience of going to the urgent care unit at the hospital (read about that here).  

I got hit while playing hockey and later that day saw some flashing lights in my peripheral vision. The urgent care unit couldn’t help me. So first they made an appointment for me with the eye clinic and second, I guess it wasn’t that urgent. 

The next day I arrived at the eye clinic for my follow-up. I was really hoping that someone would actually look at my eye this time. 

The good thing was that they did. I was escorted to a dimly lit room and asked to sit in a chair that pointed directly at a light panel. The light panel was on the wall at the far end of the room.  

They had me read the letters that came up on the panel, put drops in my eyes and then sent me back to the waiting room.

Not long after that, I was summoned to exam room 6. No one came to get me; the announcement came over the intercom, sort of like an announcement at Walmart, “There’s a blue light special over in aisle 6”. 

Fortunately, I could still see well so I found my way to the exam room and was greeted by a resident. He asked me a couple of questions and then started poking around my eye. He flashed light in my eyes and pushed on my eye while he had me look in different directions up and down, to one side, then the other. 

My eye got a good workout. 

He then wanted to do another test but first needed to turn my chair around and recline me back in it. 

The problem was that the chair wouldn’t move. He tried a couple of times and nothing. So he said, “Just a minute” and left the room.

When he came back, he had another resident with him, full of confidence. He tried to move my chair as well, but it wouldn’t budge. He then simply reached to the side, moved a lever, said “the lock was on” and left.

… That didn’t give me a lot of confidence in the resident who was working on my eye! 

After some more eye gymnastics, he told me what was wrong and said he would report this to the doctor.

When the doctor came in and looked at my eye, she told me I have a vitreous detachment, which happens naturally when we age. However, my hockey collision likely caused it to detach quickly, creating in some large floaters. 

Nothing can be done and my eye was not damaged.

Hearing her diagnosis gave me confidence that things would be alright. 

I had little confidence in the resident. … When he couldn’t move an examination chair, you have to wonder how many of these exams he had done. 

I walked out squinting because my eyes were dilated to the size of a nickels, but confident I got the right diagnosis in the end. 

Here’s the thing: Confidence can evaporate quickly with the slightest thing, often because we have put our confidence in ourselves or others. If you put your confidence in God, you can rely on His wisdom, His care and His power to diagnose and respond to every issue.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: In who or what do you tend to first put your confidence in? Leave your comments and question below.

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Experiences Can Happen When We Least Expect Them

We should always be prepared for experiences that are out of season. Most of the time, it is easy to tell when things are out of season. 

experiences can happen when you least expect them

You know when you bite a Macintosh apple in the middle of July that you are having a not-in-season fruit.

In Canada apples ripen in the fall. So if you are eating apples in the summer, those apples were probably picked in October of the previous year. 

Now, with trade partners and global shipping, today we can often get fruit that might be produced in season somewhere else in the world.

Although grapefruit ripen and are picked in the summer months, I eat them right through the winter. I eat half a grapefruit every morning because, for much of the year, the grapefruits I eat come from Israel.

That’s an example of an out-of-season experience. 

But we have these experiences in other areas of life as well. 

The best sales usually come when a product is at its end or out-of-season. Whether it is clothes, BBQs or snowblowers, we look for those out-of-season sales.

When we lived in Alberta, we had a pastors’ conference every fall. In those days it was always held in Banff – a picturesque spot definitely worth seeing, but it is a tourist place. 

Summer in Banff is beautiful and an awesome place to go hiking, camping, etc. In the winter, it is a true winter wonderland with skiing, snowshoeing and shopping. Banff is as beautiful in the winter as it is in the summer. 

But there are bumper seasons in Banff. You could call them out-of-season times, when the weather is not as warm as in summer, but there is not enough snow to ski. 

That’s when we held our pastors’ conference. We could get hotel accommodations for several hundred people at a fraction of the cost of what it would be in season. 

Those conferences and experiences in Banff were simply due to the out-of-season time we met. 

This week I had some out-of-season experiences: I played hockey in July. 

I could have easily decided to go biking instead of playing hockey, but I don’t often get that out-of-season experience so I made good on it. 

And I’m sure glad I did.

There’s nothing like showing up to the rink with your equipment bag slung over your shoulder, hockey stick in hand, wearing shorts and sandals. And there’s nothing like coming out of a cold arena into the hot sun after sweating it out on the ice in about 4° Celsius.

I haven’t played hockey in the summer for many years. I just haven’t had the opportunity. So there was no way I was going to miss getting in on some out-of-season experiences this past week. 

You just have to be ready to play any time anywhere.

Here’s the thing: There is a verse in the Bible that says “be ready in season and out of season”. It is a charge to a pastor by his mentor. But we should all be ready to speak about Christ, who He is and what He’s done for us any time an opportunity presents itself. Experiences in sharing what we believe can present themselves at any time; we just need to be ready.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Would you say you are ready in season and out? What would it take to be ready?  Leave your comments and questions below.

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Letting Go And Moving On Isn’t Always Best

When the season changes, letting go of some things and move on to other things is pretty normal.

Letting go and moving on isn't always best

Certainly that’s true with the NHL hockey playoffs. My team is now out and they’re down to four teams. The weather is getting nicer, there are bigger breaks between games and it seems like the playoffs are just dragging on. 

I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before but my daughter was born the night Calgary won the Stanley Cup back in 1989. That was May 25. Now 34 years later we have another month before a team will walk away with the cup.

I’m ready to watch golf Sunday afternoons and not be glued to a TV Saturday nights for the next four weeks.

It’s light outside for longer in the evenings; there is more to do outside in the summer. I’d really be happy if hockey season was over. 

There are so many other things that can take its place – things you can’t do in the winter months.

For me there is golf. I’m looking forward to playing more this season than I have in the past number of years. In fact, I’m playing this weekend which I’m quite excited for.

I’ve also started mountain biking again. I’ve already been out several times. It’s always interesting to bike the trails when the leaves haven’t fully come out yet. You see the trails differently from when everything is lush with colour. I like this transition time.

There are other things as well, like getting to the cottage. 

We spent the last week puttering around Sauble Beach. Though it was too cold to go in the water, it didn’t stop Lily and I from going for a 10 km walk along the beach at sundown. Our first sunset of the season and it certainly didn’t disappoint. 

… I will say our legs were a little rubbery when we got back to the cottage. 

New seasons are for letting some things go while picking new things up. However, this year I’m a little sad to let one thing go. 

Next week will be my last hockey game until fall. Yes, I said I was ready to let hockey go, but I meant watching hockey on TV. 

Other years I was also glad when I stopped playing. This year, however, it’s different. I’m sad it’s coming to an end even though I’ve played more hockey this year than I have in a long, long time. 

From February to the middle of April I played 4 to 5 times a week. Since then I’ve played on average twice a week. You might think I’ve had my fill, but I would still like to play a little in the off-season.

It’s a satisfying feeling showing up to a cold arena in shorts and sandals, hockey bag slung over your shoulder. It’s hard to describe, but the contrasts put a smile on my face.

So this year it will be hard to let go until the seasons change again.

Here’s the thing: I’ve been thinking that sometimes we let go of speaking up for God. The world doesn’t want to hear it; there is pressure to keep silent. But I was reminded in my time with God this morning that every voice matters. Whether it’s a quiet voice to a few people or through a new medium, God wants us to keep speaking up for Him. There are many other voices that seek to drown Him out, but as for me, I want to keep my voice being heard. I don’t want to let go of speaking of God’s love and goodness to us all. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you want to hang on to in this new season of life? Leave your comments and questions below.

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Linger Longer To Impact Relationships More

I think we need to linger more in order to enrich our lives. 

linger longer to impact relationships more

When I grew up playing hockey, my routine was to get into the dressing room late. I would have just enough time to put on my equipment and get onto the ice. At the end of the game, I would do the reverse. I would change quickly and be the first one out of the dressing room.

I think I have carried that practice into other areas of my life. 

But I hope to change that if I can. 

I don’t know how many golf games I’ve played with friends where we didn’t linger after the game. It seemed that there was always somewhere we had to be next. Whether that was getting home for dinner or to a meeting, there always seemed to be a bit of a rush to leave the course. 

That’s not the way it always was though. 

I remember playing golf with the same buddies at 7:20 Saturday mornings. When we finished we would sit in the club house and talk about our game and life for another hour.

I didn’t realize how much I missed that part of the game. I say that like lingering in the club house is part of the golf game because there is something to that. 

You see, by lingering after a game you savour the time you spent together knocking balls into holes.

Later I regularly played with another group of friends. We had a standing Thursday night 9 holes … or more if we could still see the ball.

Afterwards we went to McDonald’s for ice cream cones or sundaes. What we were doing is lingering.

I realized that I enjoyed that part as much as I enjoyed playing golf with those guys. 

There really is something to this lingering. You miss something in the connection when you don’t linger. 

This reflection of mine started this week because a friend called me up. He knew Lily was away and wondered if I wanted to have dinner together.

We had some extra time before we were ready to eat so we met at my house, talked for a while, then picked up a pizza and came back to my house. 

We just hung out. And that’s what lingering is. It enriches a relationship. 

We hang out lots as kids, but somewhere in adulthood we forget or get too busy to hang out, to linger. 

Today I played hockey. I got there a little late and had to quickly get ready. That’s my style. But after the game, I was the last one to leave the dressing room. I lingered. 

And that is where connections are made.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes people wonder why they don’t feel all that close to God, to the point where they wonder if He is even all that close. I can tell you one thing, if you linger with God, that’s when you find your relationship with Him is enriched. You won’t wonder why God doesn’t feel close; you will experience His presence in rich and meaningful ways. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who do you need to linger with? Leave your comments and questions below.

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The Biggest Crowd This Year Didn’t Miss A Thing

It was probably the biggest crowd of the year and we got our money’s worth.

the biggest crowd this year didn't miss a thing

The other night I went to watch our city’s OHL team, the Kingston Frontenacs. This has been an interesting year because they have played to no fans, 500 fans, 2500 fans, and now to full capacity. 

I’m sure the players like having all the people back to watch and cheer them on. It worked last night. Not only did they win, but there were a couple of fights and lots of goals.

Not only have these guys had to play before a fluctuating number of occupied seats, they have also only been able to play some teams in their division. 

In the OHL there are a total of 20 teams, divided into two conferences. But this year they only played against the teams in their own conference, with most of their games played against the 5 teams in their division. It seems like they have been playing one of the same 4 teams every other game. 

It would be like going back to the NHL when they only had 6 teams. You get really familiar with the other players. And because hockey is a fairly physical game, this familiarity also results in more fights on the ice.

There were two fights last night and several skirmishes with pushing and shoving. 

This all got the fans on their feet, cheering louder. At one point it was standing room only in the penalty box!

There is always a league official in the box with the players, so I pity that guy the other night. A couple of the players were in there for over 10 minutes. 

On the ice there was some question of who was in control. The  Fronts started the scoring, then got behind 2 to 1. They then tied the game with under 4 seconds left in the period. 

The next two frames were all Kingston, scoring 5 straight goals.

Everyone left happy … until they got outside and saw all the snow on the ground.

The sidewalks were so slippery I practically skated back to the car. It was kind of like I watched three periods of hockey and then I skated for another period in my shoes. 

Lil was wearing boots and had good traction; it was me who almost went down about 4 times. I looked like one of those cartoon characters who slips on a banana peel and their legs start spinning around trying to stay under control. 

I did that a few times, but I won my game as well. I was 4 and O against the snow and sidewalk. 

I never went down once … but the only fans watching me were the people in their cars trying to maneuver through the traffic. I’m sure I put on a good show for them.

When there is potential mayhem about to take place, it draws people’s attention. Everyone turns to it to see what the outcome will be. Will the player on our team win the fight? Will the guy on the sidewalk fall on his rear end?

Here’s the thing: When a Christian leader fails, when something comes to light, people take notice. But remember, the failure on the part of a Christian is a reflection on his own imperfect desires and actions; it is not a reflection on our perfect God. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What needs to be corrected or set in right order in your life? Leave your comments and questions below.

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Maybe Vaccination Passports Are A Good Thing

I think I might be changing my mind about the vaccination passports. 

maybe vaccination passports are a good thing

I can’t say that I ever liked to have to show proof that I’m vaccinated when going to a restaurant or a hockey game, but maybe there is a place for these passports in our society. 

Ontario was late getting their electronic QR code all set up, but we have been showing proof of vaccination since the fall. 

I had a pretty neat set up with my vaccination receipt and a picture of my driver’s licence on the same page in my phone. 

There was no fumbling, no scrolling, searching for another document. I just showed the person at the door my page. They squinted for a few moments until their eyes adjusted to the 6 pt type size on the document. 

When I had to, I made the switch and conveniently was able to put my driver’s licence picture on the same screen as my QR code. So it worked easily for me.

It still is a hassle. You can’t just enter an establishment. You have to line up to prove you are allowed to be there.

Remember the days when we never thought of pulling out our wallet or phone until we got to the cash on the way out, or until the waiter or waitress handed us the machine at our table to pay? 

Those were truly the good old days, weren’t they? And we are going back to them very soon.

I can hardly wait in one sense, but in another I’m thinking it’s too bad because I’ve just discovered something really good about vaccination passports. And it all has to do with going to the movies. 

In the last couple of weeks I’ve seen two movies in the theatre. One of them Lily wanted to see and the other I really had to see. It was my duty.

Anyway, both times we arrived at the theatre there was a line of people outside waiting to get in. The line was because it takes time to show your credentials to get into the movie. 

The theatre is still not that busy and they have a very large lobby. But for some reason, they want to scan your QR code just inside the doors, which means you are standing outside until it’s your turn to show your code.

But here is the best part and why maybe we should keep the passports for a while – at least at theatres: The people scanning that black and white square piece of art on your phone are so focussed on that that they don’t verify if you even have a movie ticket. 

That’s right, the last two movies I went to I didn’t need to buy a ticket. All I needed was my QR code and driver’s license. 

All I can say is I’m glad I only paid the senior’s rate. It was Lily who paid the big bucks to see those two flicks.

Here’s the thing: I think some people think that when they get to heaven, God will look at all the good things they did and just forget about the bad – maybe just overlook the bad because of all the good. But God doesn’t work that way. It’s the bad that separates us from Him and no amount of good on our part can overcome the bad. It is only by the sacrifice of Jesus that we can have a relationship with God. By putting your faith in Christ, He takes away all the bad. That’s something to think about.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is something you overlook that you shouldn’t? Leave your comments and questions below.

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