mentoring

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He Was Just One Step Behind

We are all just one step ahead or one step behind someone else.

de grasse bolt

We are either in a position to help someone who’s coming up behind us or to seek the advice of someone who’s already doing what we are about to do.

The other day I watched the Olympics 100 metre final with Usain Bolt and our Canadian kid, Andre De Grasse.

He pronounces his name “De Grass” but it should be pronounced “Degrassi” because of the Canadian TV show that made the name so popular. Even Usain Bolt, in an interview after the run, referred to him as “Degrassi”.

The whole way through the race Usain was just a step ahead of Andre. When it was over, they congratulated each other like big brother, little brother.

There was the sense that this young kid will be stepping into the shoes of the great runner, Usain Bolt.

This isn’t something that only athletes do.

All of us have opportunities to glean from people who are just a step ahead of us or help those who are coming up behind us.

I recently got a phone call from a friend who had a heart attack a couple of months ago. He had heard from my brother that I had had one four years ago. He wanted to ask me some questions as he was a step behind me.

We shared our stories of how the attacks went down, and then compared the medications we were taking. He had questions about how he was feeling and the side effects to some of the drugs.

He wanted to know what the future would hold for him, and I was enough of a step ahead to be able to give him some comfort.

It was interesting, though, as I reflected back. At first, all I remembered were the positive things – I remembered how easy the recovery was.

But as we talked and he shared some of his concerns, I remembered having some of those same thoughts. His experience jogged my memory.

But from my experience, I was able to dispel some of his concerns that could cause anxiety. Looking at me, one step ahead, he could have hope that it was going to be alright for him, too.

You know, it’s great to have that kind of relationship, where both people sense they are not alone, that someone else knows what they are going through. There is a feeling that you are part of a brotherhood, a fraternity that shares a common trait or quest or experience.

There are things that only those who’ve experienced what you’ve experienced can share together.

It gives you a sense that there are others who understand you, identify with how you feel, and know the kinds of thoughts you have, who you can go to to work through some of your questions.

Andre De Grasse and Usain Bolt, both draped in their reflective flags, walked arm in arm, while Usain whispered some words of encouragement to the man who was just one step behind him.

… and you know those words were good by the smiles on both of their faces.

Here’s the thing: We call this relationship mentoring and, no matter what you are experiencing in life, there is probably someone close by you who’s one step ahead or one step behind. Seek them out; it’s how we go forward, in life and with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who has been your greatest mentor? Leave your comments below.

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How To Develop Neatness in Your Children

I wonder if neatness is something that you grow into, just like you grow into new sizes of clothes and how you grow into a new set of teeth. It just happens as you get older.

Black & white (Ex)

My son, Mike, has been home for the last week, in-between places. The old apartment lease was up at the end of the month but the new place, which I like to call the “Park St. I Palace” (or PIP for short), was not ready yet.

I call the new place the PIP because it’s on Park Street and it’s all about being independent and out of all the grungy holes he’s lived in while at university. This place is palatial!

So with this transition period, Mike needed a place to store his furniture and stuff. The furniture we put in the garage, and the stuff, well, it took over three rooms in the house and then leaked a little more into the living room and a bathroom.

Whoa! I forgot what his room was like when he was in high school; now there’s just more of it. I remember being messy when I lived at home (and I wouldn’t say that I’m a neat freak now), but Mike takes messy to a new level of disorder.

Since I’m much neater now, I figure there is a chance Mike will become neater, too. You see, he just hasn’t grown into his neatness yet.

The thing is, you can predict when you grow into some things, like your new teeth. It starts happening around six and by about twelve you have your new set that will last you a lifetime … or until you get a few knocked out playing hockey or something.

But you can’ t predict when you’ll grow into your neatness. For our daughter Karlie, I think it was somewhere between her second and third year of university.

For me, my neatness didn’t come until after I was married, and then there was some mandatory instruction that came with it via my wife.

Possibly, it’ll take a similar scenario for Mike to really grow into his neatness … but he’s pretty remedial so I’m not sure it will be easy on her, whoever that might be.

Some good news for everyone involved in this transition was that the PIP was ready earlier than anticipated and he moved in on Saturday. I helped a little and what I liked right away was the smell of fresh paint when I walked in. The place was clean and bright.

As I looked around at how nice a spot it was, I wondered if he will grow into his neatness there in the PIP. You never know what might kick off a growth spurt.

The great thing for Lily and me is the dishevelled look of the house has returned to its original state. For Lily this is a blessing because now she’s just back to picking up after one mess monster instead of two.

Here’s the thing: We might think we will naturally grow in our relationship with God. But our human tendency is to grow apart from Him. We must make a conscious effort and take specific steps to grow closer to Christ. We must put ourselves in a place where we are learning and discovering and applying His principles to our lives – like being mentored, or joining a small group, or taking a class, or studying the Bible on your own.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question:  So what are you doing to grow in Christ? I’d love to hear from you; you can leave a comment below.