my day

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The Season I Hate The Most!

When we think of seasons, we think of spring, summer, fall and winter. But there are other seasons too, you know. Some I really look forward to, like golf season, biking season, and hockey season that is nearing an end. Then there are seasons I don’t really like – tax season is one of them.

Seasons all have prevailing weather patterns associated with them. Tax season definitely has a weather pattern: prevailing dark clouds with an 85% chance of rain!

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It starts in January when you get your T4 slip (Canada), charitable receipts etc. You also start to think about making that late RRSP contribution before the end of February deadline.

The information starts to churn in your stomach and nag at the back of your mind, reminding you to get moving on your taxes. There are also constant promptings in the malls, with partitioned booths set up everywhere offering to do your taxes for a fee.

I should be glad for tax time because I get a refund. But the thought of a sunny refund is clouded over by the thought of having to prepare my taxes in the first place. It’s like a clash of high and low pressure fronts creating barometric pressure that would give anyone a headache!

My wife wants me to get someone else to do our taxes, but I don’t like the idea of spending my money, just to get my money back from the government.

I wouldn’t say the CRA (Canada Revenue Agency) picks on me, but about every two years I get a letter asking for more information or they will take some money back. I would think there are other people who make a lot more money than me with possible errors to hunt down.

I have completed my daughter’s taxes for her and she is now experiencing the bright, warm weather of a coming refund … even though Calgary is facing spring snow and cold temperatures.

I’ve got all the paperwork together to do my wife’s and my taxes. I’ve even started to enter in some of the information. There’s just one hitch: my son. He’s keeping the clouds from moving on. I need him to do his taxes before I can complete mine, so I know what I can claim for his education.

So here I sit under an umbrella in my own house, trying to stay dry, trying to put on a happy face in the midst of my depression and looming tax clouds!

I know tax season will be over soon; I know there are sunny days ahead. But I must have a bit of farmer in me. I feel like heading down to the coffee shop to chew the fat with the boys. You know, complain that if it doesn’t stop raining the crops aren’t going to be any good this year.

Hey, I’ll make it through.

Here’s the thing: We can stay in a state of hopelessness because of circumstances or sin. We can complain about it, worry about it, even fuss about it to others as to how we are hard done by. Or we can take our sorry state and do something about it. Take it to God, and allow Him to work on it for you and with you. … Maybe I should take my taxes to H&R Block.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you tend to complain about instead of taking action towards? Leave your comment below.

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King of the Hill

It’s not often that I gawk at an accident. In fact, I purposely try not to slow down too much when I pass one, because it bugs me when people hold up traffic trying to rubber neck and get a good peak at the wreckage.

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But the other day, I was cruising through a parking lot and came across an interesting sight. I chuckled to myself when I saw it, but per my conviction, I kept driving past. Then  I thought, “This is too good to pass up!” so I turned around and parked the car.

This blue SUV was hung up on a mountain of snow. I was already laughing when I got out of the car and started to walk over with my iPhone. I had no intention of calling for help; I wanted a picture!  Do you know how hard it is to get a good picture when you’re laughing?

As I was getting the vehicle in my cross hairs, the woman who was driving the SUV saw me and blurted out, “Oh no! You’re not going to put this on YouTube, are you?” She was embarrassed, which just made me laugh harder, and for a moment I thought I should be taking video rather than still shots.

I circled the site and I wondered how in the world she could have gotten her car on that pile of snow. There was no snow around in any direction. It was the only snow mountain in the parking lot and she found it!  Maybe she wanted to conquer it … which she sort of did.

When I was a kid we used to play “king of the hill” on the huge snow pile the snowplow pushed into the middle of our cul-de-sac. It was always the big guys that could stay up on top the longest. This vehicle was on top and it was staying there, so I guess she won.

I think if she had have called a dealership they may have given her some money for leaving the car there. It looked like it was on one of those fake bolder structures you see at car dealerships. It would create some attention.

After taking 3 or 4 pictures, I had to know how or why she did this. She told me she turned her head to look at a parking spot and drove right up the mountain. But why not stop when you feel the resistance? Or better yet, when you turn down the row, look what’s ahead before looking for a parking spot!

My theory – and it’s only a theory – is that when she hit the snow, she thought, “I can get over this”, and stepped on the gas. It was, after all, a SUV: Sports Utility Vehicle. Don’t they make them for rough and rugged terrain, and … for climbing up snow mountains?

When I left the scene, the tow truck was on its way. About 20 minutes later, I drove by that parking lot again and noticed the snow was still there, but the vehicle was gone, and that woman was no longer king of the hill.

Here’s the thing: There are obstacles we have to deal with in life only because we didn’t pay attention to God warning us to stop, or go around them. If we learn to listen to and heed His guidance, we can avoid some of the mountains we face.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question:  What obstacles have you avoided because you paid attention? Leave your comment below.

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Different Rules Apply

There are different rules around our house when I’m on my own … to be accurate, it was my son and I who were on our own this weekend. Lily was away speaking at a women’s retreat.

Before she left, she gave us some rules to live by while she was gone. But even as she shared her expectations with us, I knew that when the door shut, a whole different set of rules would kick in.

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I listened to her directions and got some tips, like for meals she wanted us to eat the leftovers in the fridge and not spend money on food. However, I made it clear to Mike that the leftovers were for lunches and evening meals would be pizza and wings. … not together, mind you … pizza one night and then wings for the hockey game Saturday night.

I’m sure that as Lily tells us what we should eat, by now she realizes what will really happen. I think it is her eternal, optimistic, pie-in-the-sky hope that maybe we will actually follow her rules that forces her to tell us.

Along with the eating rules, the cleanliness rules go out the window as well. She knows better than to expect us to keep up to her standards. She only expects that when she returns the place will look like it did when she left. Whatever happens between then, she tries very hard not to think about.

Lily has this rule that is etched into her brain that she can’t leave the house or go to bed unless the dishes are all washed and the kitchen is clean. Mike and I don’t share the same etching in our melons! To go a day or two with a sink full of dishes is not a problem. I figure that’s why we bought a set of twelve dishes and not four.

My rule is if you leave it in the sink, put some hot water on it so that when you finally get to washing, the gunk will come off easily. It’s a good rule to follow and over the years it’s saved me a lot of time in the kitchen.

When the kids were little, keeping the place clean was more difficult. There were toys strewn all over that needed to be picked up. But now, it’s a cinch – we don’t make that much of a mess! There’s just a few clothes, crumbs, and clutter that needs to be cleaned and straightened before Lily shows up at the door.

And I know that just before she enters the house she starts imagining what it might look like. She hopes for cleanliness but braces herself for substandard neat and tidy. I know how her mind works. She played a tape in her head of what the house looked like during the weekend just to prepare herself for what she would find.

In the end, disappointment or satisfaction reigns in her, depending on whether she believes we made an effort or not.

Here’s the thing: God’s standard is perfection – something you and I can’t reach. But God has arranged it so we just have to be ready to meet Him when we die or Christ returns. God’s disappointment or satisfaction with us will be based on whether our faith is placed in Christ. And He will be able to tell if it is or not, depending on if we are seeking to please Christ or are not making any effort. Let’s all be ready.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you prepare for an inspection?  Leave your comment below.

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Santa Is Dead

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I don’t think Santa is coming back next year.

I am fully aware that it is March and we are far, far from that time of year when the jolly old fella usually shows up. However, I just happened to be driving by a house in a nearby subdivision and there was Santa lying on the ground. Pictures don’t lie … and the spears that have pinned him and his trusty helpers to the ground, don’t bode well for his return next December.

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No, I don’t believe in Santa Claus, but I do believe in keeping your decorations applicable to the season. I understand that some people leave their Christmas lights up all year long, but if you don’t look up too high you don’t even notice them.

Lawn ornaments, though? Come on! How hard is it to pack Santa up and put him a box? He’s already been deflated; there’s no HO, HO, HO left in him. I think the kids on the street would become a little suspect that Santa isn’t real when he is laying dead on your doorstep for three months.

As I have looked around the neighbourhood, I’ve seen lots of Christmas ornaments still on display. There was a plastic snowman on a lawn the other night with a light still shining brightly inside him. This weekend was St. Patrick’s Day – at least put a shamrock or a green scarf around his neck!

I’ll admit I’m not the first guy to take down his lights after Christmas. I usually miss the first warm day and end up taking them down when it’s freezing outside. But I get the job done by the middle of January at the latest!

Last year as I was walking around our neighbourhood, I noticed there were lots of people who still had their Christmas lights up in April and May. By looking at the condition of some of the lights, it was apparent they had been there for several years.

Maybe those people lost their ladder. Maybe their garage is so packed that the ladder is buried in there somewhere. Maybe they figure they don’t have room for lights in the basement or garage so they just leave them up.

I think that if you leave your Christmas decoration up all year you have to use them in some way, like maybe change the lightbulbs to pink and blue and white for Easter. Have your blow up Santa hold a big old Pysanka (Ukrainian Easter egg).

On Canada Day, change your lights to red and white and have your blow up reindeer sport Canadian flag saddles. On Labour Day, place them all working in the garden.

Maybe we should have a law that you get a $25 fine for having Christmas decorations up past February 1st. Here’s an idea: JUST TAKE DOWN YOUR CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS!

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we don’t deal with the sin in our lives right away. It becomes clutter in our relationship with God. We need to pay attention to the clutter or we get used to having it in our lives. The best way to take down the clutter or sin is through regular confession to God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What tends to clutter you home, yard, life? Leave your comment below.

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When The Couch Is Call’n

Sunday afternoons I like to take a nap on the couch. It’s not really that I like to take a nap, rather I NEED to take a nap. There is some kind of power that overtakes me and I can’t do anything about it.

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Last Sunday was a good example. I was up early at 6 am, had a busy morning, preached a sermon, greeted people at the door, and by the time we locked up and headed home from church it was about one in the afternoon.

After lunch I wanted to watch a little golf, but there was a hockey game on first, so I settled in to catch the last period. Lily came down to join me and show me something on Facebook.

I watched it and then, as we talked, I could feel myself slipping away. Lil noticed and started laughing, which stirred me a little. She said she was going to change the channel to something else. I said, “Don’t. I’m watching the game.” She simply grinned and replied, “I’ll wait 30 seconds ‘till you fall asleep.”

In a matter of a minute I could feel myself going. It’s hard to describe the feeling, but everything around me becomes a blur. The noise from the TV is nothing more than static white noise and I can’t make out what anyone is saying.

Somehow, like Sampson, strength leaves my body and my limbs become heavy and useless. There is also a sense like someone has hit the remote switch on my eyelids and they slowly descend over my eyes like having automated blinds on your windows.

Once that happens, I can’t give you any more details. I am gone, gone gone! And Lily freely changes the channel without any opposition from me.

What happened on Sunday was not the first time. This is a regular Sunday afternoon occurrence – one that I’ve practiced for years … too many years to count, in fact. I inherited this trait from my father and grandfather. For many years I watched them go through this same Sunday afternoon process.

Back then I thought it was wasted time, but somehow, somewhere in my 30’s, it showed up in my life. At times I have fought it and kept myself busy during the afternoon, but more and more I am embracing this phenomenon.

It may have something to do with my ability to sleep pretty much anywhere. If I can get horizontal or even semi-horizontal, there is a very good chance I won’t be entering into conversation for very long.

It’s clear that there is probably nothing I can do about the Sunday afternoon nap. It’s now a habit … and you can probably predict what I will be doing next Sunday afternoon!

Here’s the thing: There was a time when it seemed like work to try to fit even 5 minutes in my day to spend with God. But as my relationship with God has grown more and more, it’s almost automatic now for me to get up before anyone else in the house and spend an extended time with Him. So you can probably predict where I’ll be at 6 am most days.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has become automatic regarding your relationship with God? Leave your comment below.

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Stop Staring!

We had dinner the other night in a restaurant that looked like a hunting cabin. I’m not much of a hunter – never been hunting, unless you count picking off barn swallows with a pellet gun when I was about twelve. I’m also not much of a fisherman. I have fished but I found it to be a bit of a snoozer for me.

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I took our kids fishing on vacation a couple of times when they were little. I had to carry their rods, put the worms on their hooks, untangle their lines when they got too close to each other, and take the fish off the hooks (that part didn’t happen much). It didn’t leave me much time to fish, and just about the time I got my line in the water they were ready to call it quits.

… So having dinner in this place didn’t necessarily make me feel like I was in a familiar place.

Don’t get me wrong, it was very comfortable. We sat in high wingback chairs like the kind you would find in someone’s living room. And all around were reminders that humans are at the top of the food chain.

There were stuffed animals everywhere you looked. These were not the fluffy kind you buy your kids at Toys R Us, but rather the dead kind you buy from the taxidermist.

I kind of wondered if you could order a meal by just pointing to an animal on the wall and grunting a bit. But when I looked at the menu, it didn’t offer any otter, but there was one on the wall!

The whole place was kind of rustic. There was a big old fireplace in the middle of the room and the walls looked like the inside of a log cabin which is what the outside of a log cabin looks like too. When we were shown to our table, I found myself sitting directly in front of the fireplace, above which was huge moose … not a whole moose, just a head.

This moose head came out from the wall a long way, and I couldn’t tell if he had a happy look on his face because he was friendly or because we all looked like a late night snack to him. Apparently, mooses (as I like to call them) are vegetarians so I guess he was glad to see us.

But still, it looked like he had an eye on me. Every time I looked up I saw old Bullwinkle gawking at me. I tried to avoid his stare but something about him commanded my attention.

One time, I said something funny to my wife and then looked at the moose to see if he also got it. He was still smiling so maybe he did. By the end of dinner, I was used to him watching me. I felt like we were buddies, even though he never said a word.

Still, I didn’t turn my back towards him till I got out the door. See ya next time, friend.

Here’s the thing: There is nowhere you can go where God is not present. There is nowhere you can be that He doesn’t see you. It should be comforting to know God is always there … unless you are somewhere you shouldn’t be, and then it should be unnerving.

That’s Life!
Paul

Question: How do you feel about knowing God sees you all the time? Leave your comment below.

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He Said It Would Save Me Time

Sometimes a phrase or sentence – even a word – can save you a lot of time. Recently, I spent hours doing a mundane little task because I didn’t first receive some crucial information.

I bought a new program that tracks and keeps all the information about my sermons in one place.  But there’s a learning curve. I’m learning how to build scripts, portals, and containers.

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It might sound fun – like I’m working on a time machine – but it’s just a database. When I’m done it will be slick, but I still have lots to figure out. I worked on it pretty much my entire day off this week, and I’ll need to spend several more off hours to get it working right.

When I’m done, it will be awesome … in a nerdy, database kind of way. From just one screen I will be able to plan, research, grab resources, catalogue … and clean up after breakfast! It’s like sitting down to do your taxes and having all the information you need in front of you … and not having to get up to find some receipt, address or your son’s tuition information.

I enjoy figuring out how to use this program but what I don’t like is doing work to correct the mistakes I’ve made. I have been watching instructional videos of a guy explaining different aspects of the program. I have a new appreciation for people who have to listen to me preach every week.

The difference is people listen to me for a half hour or so, once a week. I’ve been listening to this same whiney-voiced guy for about 10 hours straight! You can imagine how annoyed I am with him right now. And when, about 5 hours in, he said that it is better to set up a numbering system BEFORE you enter your data, my mood turned really ugly towards him.

I have been building my database while I’ve been learning. In the process, I have already imported 980 records! These are records of my messages, titles, themes, and passages, dating back to 1997!

But then my friendly little instructor says I need to give a specific or unique number to each record in my database. And in a casual way he says, “You will save a lot of time if you do this before you import your data.”

I felt like reaching into the computer and grabbing him, not to hurt him, just to shake him a little and scream into his ear, “Why didn’t you say that right at the beginning?!” It was just one sentence. He could have said it in the introduction. It would have saved me hours! I had to manually go back into every record and number them. What a waste of time.

It was a long, boring task, and a few times I lost track of the numbers and had to go back and correct the sequence. But now that it’s done, and I’m further into my learning, I see how essential it was for me to make that little correction.

Here’s the thing: Life is just like that. At the beginning, we don’t know everything we need to live a godly life. We learn as we go and often find that we’ve made some mistakes along the way. The sooner we discover those mistakes, the easier it is to correct them. That’s why it’s good to keep short accounts with God.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: What do you wish you had known ten years ago? Leave your comment below.

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Some People Don’t Age Well

You’ve heard the line, “You know you’re getting old when…” There are all kinds of ways to finish that sentence: You know you’re getting old when you and your teeth sleep separately; or, you know you’re getting old when you’re the first guy to the public urinals and the last one to leave.

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Well, there is another way to tell you’re getting old, and that is go to a concert of a band from your youth. This week a friend of mine called me up and said he had two tickets to see Randy Bachman.

Now if you don’t have a clue who I’m talking about, you were born before the 1930’s, or after the 70’s and you’re not Canadian. Randy Bachman was a founding member of The Guess Who, and then went on to form another band called Bachman Turner Overdrive (BTO).

This concert was a little different, as it was at the Grand Theatre in Kingston, and not at an arena. It was a little more intimate and wasn’t about the performer playing song after song. Bachman was there to tell stories of his life in the music industry and how the songs were written.

The stories and music were amazing. When the band would start to play an old classic, I found that I kept picturing myself back in my teens. But then I looked around and saw all these old people around me.

I couldn’t get over how many old people liked “BTO”. When I say old, I don’t just mean a little grey hair – we’re talking wrinkled skin, unruly eyebrows and white hair. These people were ancient!

I felt like a kid amongst them. I was trying to figure out how much older most of the crowd was than me, and they had to average about 10 years plus.

I knew going in that the crowd wasn’t going to be young. I’d been to a Rolling Stones concert when I was about 40 and everyone there was my age or older. But that was nothing compared to this group. I saw canes, and there was a line up for the men’s washroom … when does that ever happen?!

During the intermission, I found myself staring at people trying to figure out what they might have looked like when they were in their teens or early twenties. I would look at them and squint to see if I could picture them appearing wrinkle-free.

It was about then that I realized I had been remembering myself back when I was in my teens and, in reality, I kind of fit in with these old folks. Of course, I was on the much younger side of the crowd . . . but it probably wasn’t that obvious, except to me.

I thought to myself, “What happened to these people?” Then I thought, “What happened to me?!”

. . . We’re getting old, that’s what’s happening! It was all a little disconcerting.  But the music made me feel like I was 18 again. Thanks Randy . . .  both of you.

Here’s the thing: Even though we get older and mature physically and spiritually, God still sees us as His children. We need to remember we have that kind of relationship with Him when we are with Him in prayer. Enjoy!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What experience of the past causes you to reminisce about how your life with Christ has changed?  Leave your comment below.

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Like a Square Peg in a Round Hole

Yesterday I helped a friend purchase an electronic tablet. I thought it would be straight forward, but part way through the process I realized I was going to be locked into the lengthy task of helping my friend learn how to use the device.

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If I helped someone in their twenties purchase a tablet, by the end of the transaction the need for my help would end. But my friend is not in his twenties and I can see that my services will be required for quite some time.

… And that gives me flashbacks to my dad with his computer! He would call me with a computer problem, hoping I would be able to solve it over the phone. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I was a pastor and not a computer geek, but I’m sure that wouldn’t have stopped him from seeking my help.

I would ask him to describe what he had on his computer screen so that I could replicate it on mine and then try to walk him through a solution. That might sound like a great plan, but most of the time, while he was supposedly following my steps, he would blurt out “It’s gone”. And then the following dialogue would ensue:

“What’s gone, Dad?”

“Oh, it’s back again!”

“What’s gone? What’s back? Dad, back away from the keyboard. Don’t touch anything!”

These calls were painful at times, trying to get a 73 year old to master new technology. It was like teaching a child which hole the round peg goes in and which hole the square one goes in. I remember how many times I had to show our kids, saying “No, see? The round one goes in here.”

They would still try to stick the square one in the round hole, but you had the hope that eventually, in time, they were going to figure it out. I remember I didn’t have that same hope with my dad.

One time when I was talking to my brother, I mentioned these computer help calls I’d been getting from Dad. As soon as I asked, “Has Dad ever called you about his computer?”, my brother’s eyes got all crazy-like and he just said, “Don’t get me started!”

It was then that I realized that my dad had a master plan for getting computer help. His plan was simple: phone one son until he was exasperated and then phone the other. My dad would go back and forth asking computer questions to whomever he thought had the most patience.

So yesterday in the store, I started to gear myself up for a barrage of calls and drop in appointments to my help desk. I guess my computer help desk is open for service again.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we make the mistake of thinking that God is like us and gets tired of our repeated requests. But God isn’t like us at all. So don’t ever stop bringing your requests and confessions to Him. He is always eager to hear from you.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Have you ever felt like you couldn’t bother God with something again?  Leave your comment below.

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I Got All Greased Up

Friday night after a very long day, my wife and I went out for dinner.  I’m not sure I consider getting fast food as going out for dinner, but, we didn’t eat at home. Normally, Friday nights is leftovers night, but this night I needed a treat.

We went to “Five Guys”, a restaurant that just opened in our neighbourhood. The burgers are good there and yes, I know it’s not healthy – you can tell by the grease soaking through the brown paper bag that the food comes in.

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I figure I can handle a little grease in my system every once in a while because I’m taking medication for that.

I don’t know the technical term for what it does, but in my understanding I picture the medication puts something like a teflon coating on your arteries so that all the crud, (triglycerides, cholesterol) or sludge, just keeps on sliding through.

That’s the way I picture it anyway … so that my conscience is clear. If you know something different, don’t tell me. I like the picture I have in my mind.

When we went into the restaurant I noticed a few things. First, there were a lot of employees. They were young; they all looked like teenagers, except for the big guy who I figured was the manager, or two of the five guys!

Second, though they call it fast food, it really wasn’t all that fast. McDonalds is fast. Wendy’s is pretty fast. But at Five Guys, they give you a number and say they will call you up when the food is ready.

With the shear volume of little people scurrying around in the kitchen, you’d think you would have your order by the time you paid for it.

Not so! We found a table and waited. I’ll admit though, the waiting was pretty enjoyable … they have free peanuts in the shell, which we availed ourselves of.

I noticed Lily was being uncharacteristically messy with the peanuts. I was putting the shells back in the tray with the unopened ones, just to keep the table neat. Lily was throwing them on the floor!

Once I figured out that everyone did that – there were peanut shells everywhere – I got right into it. By the time our food came, I think I had the most shells around my chair.

Along with the free peanuts to bide our time, were the signs all around the restaurant inviting you to read them. They were endorsements in big writing so they were easily read anywhere you sat.

They all had a similar theme. They told you how great Five Guys was. It wasn’t like they were tooting their own horn, but at the same time they were because they were using these accolades as decoration.

The only disconcerting thing about these ego-pumping posters was that most of the dates on them were from 5 or 6 years ago. As you read them, you just hoped the food wasn’t that old.

The food finally came, the burgers were delicious, and the fries were well worth the extra grease running through my veins.

Here’s the thing: We went to the restaurant for a burger and fries but we experienced a lot more. When you first come to Christ, it’s often because you have a particular need, desire, or concern. But what you find is your experience with Him is so much more.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How has your experience with God expanded from what drew you to him in the first place?  Leave a comment below.