out of control

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When The Conversation Is Out Of Your Control

Conversations usually flow from one topic to another at a gathering, but when the party is heavy on the testosterone you lose all control of the dialogue.

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That would be how I would describe our Easter dinner this year.

In my last post (read it here), I wrote about our plans for Easter dinner and said that in this post I would write about how it turned out.

Lily was sort of forced to buy a thirty pound turkey because that was the only size she could find at the grocery store. To save me from having to eat turkey for the next six months, she came up with a plan to invite some people who knew how to finish off a ton of food.

We invited two players from the Kingston Frontenacs hockey team, and two of our son Mike’s friends.

That gave us five guys 25 and under, myself, Lily and our daughter, Karlie. When it came to the food, Lily and Karlie didn’t stand a chance. And when it came to the conversation, the guys monopolized that too.

Easter is a time when our focus is on the resurrection of Christ, the price He paid for our sins and the amazing gift of a relationship with God that Christ offers us.

However, some of our company had just come back from an afternoon of riding quads on muddy trails, so naturally the boys needed to spend some time rehashing all the ups and downs of the episode.

Some of our conversation around the dinner table focussed on the more spectacular antics on the quads, getting stuck, who almost died on the outing and who made the biggest fool of themselves.

I’m not much into that sport; in fact, I’ve never ridden a quad before. I have, however, ridden my mountain bike on some pretty muddy trails, so I was all ears as we listened to the exchange among the guys. Voices and laughter seemed to get louder as the stories turned to the personal shortcomings of one and all.

At Easter dinner there is nothing wrong with diverting from the main theme of the day, but hey, we also had some hockey players with us who are right in the middle of the OHL playoffs.

Everyone wanted to know how they were feeling about the series and how they thought it would turn out. We analyzed the team and talked about old hockey stories that related.

Of course, on any hockey team there are some characters that stand out. And just like with the boys who went quading, there were moments in the conversation that focussed on some of the crazy antics that happen within a hockey club.

By the time dinner was over, there was a table full of stuffed people who barely had room for dessert.

Though we didn’t really talk about the Easter message – other than a quick explanation and saying grace – most of the guys felt like they’d been verbally crucified by the others over the course of the meal … not typical for an Easter dinner, but typical when you gather five young men around the same table and bring food into the mix.

Here’s the thing: When guys get talking the stories can become bigger and better. The biggest story in the history of the world, however, is the love God has shown us in sending His only Son to die on a cross so that you and I can have a relationship with Him. There is no bigger story!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you relate to the biggest story in history? Leave your comment below.

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Anybody Else Have Hair Issues?

This morning I looked in the mirror and realized I can’t keep up with the hair on my body. If you’re under 40 and reading this, right now you’re thinking, “That’s gross!” – maybe you even said it out loud. If you’re over 40, you probably just thought to yourself, “Ya, so what?”

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At the time I made this discovery, I was using my handy, battery-powered shaver for hair that grows on one’s ears (yes, they make something for that). And, as much as my son chuckles at all the hair I have on my body, there was a time when it wasn’t like that.

In my teens, I focussed growing hair on my head – and I did a pretty good job of it. I’d show you a picture, but for some reason I don’t have any pictures of myself when I was a teen. It’s too bad because I had some pretty good outfits back then to go with my hair!

My hair grew long and thick and people who cut my hair would say, “You’ll never go bald” … but I’m not so sure of that now.

You see, I’m still growing hair – and it grows long – but it’s not focussed on my head any more.  That part is thinning out. But I can grow some great patches of hair on my ears and back. I’m thinking of buying a mini lawnmower just to keep the hair on my back neatly trimmed.

Then there is the nose hair. I know that if I just left that to itself, I’d have a jungle in there. Even my eyebrows – I can grow some funky, long curly hairs there too.

What happened to me? One day you’re smirking at the gorilla guy on the beach, and the next day you ARE the gorilla guy on the beach!

I realize that people who read this and see me on a regular basis will start checking me out a little more closely. I’ll just warn you now, you’ll see some wild hair, because I’ve lost control of it.

One of the differences between men and women is that women have been plucking and pruning all their lives. But for guys to start doing that in their 40’s or 50’s, it’s too late to put that into our regular grooming routine. It just gets away on us sometimes.

You know when you see your lawn and think, “I should really cut the grass today”, but you’re so tired, you don’t?  And then it rains for the next three days and you have meetings in the evening for the next two after that.

By the time you cut your grass, it’s twice as long as it was when you originally noticed that it needed cutting.

That same scenario applies to trimming the hair on your body.

This morning I threw my hands up in defeat, and said, “I give up”.  I couldn’t even get myself to shave my face. Fortunately, it’s Saturday. I have work to do around the house, so no one’s going to see me anyway.

I’ll worry about getting all my hairs cut tomorrow . . .  I hope it doesn’t rain.

Here’s the thing: You can’t control how your hair grows as you get older, but you can control how your relationship with God grows. The tendency can be to coast and not take care of it. But don’t settle for that. Keep growing as you get older. Your relationship with the Lord doesn’t have to get old as you age. It can be fresh, exciting and new if you will tend to it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What ways do you fight getting older? Leave your comment below.

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What To Do In A Hotel Fire

We’ve all heard fire alarms go off. All through grade school we have been trained in what to do when a fire alarm sounds. But what about when the fire alarm goes off in your hotel while you are staying on the fourteenth floor?

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Fourteen floors of sheer terror – doesn’t it sound like a movie? I remember seeing “Towering Inferno” in the 70’s. I’ve also grooved to the popular hit “Disco Inferno”, of that same era (google it and enjoy).

I grew up in Toronto and we would get US news from Buffalo on TV and there were always fires being reported at 6 and 11. It was either a three alarm fire in Cheektowaga or a four alarm fire in North Tonawanda, but you knew every night there was a fire burning somewhere in Buffalo.

With that kind of background and experience, I was ready when our fire alarm started ringing at about 11:45 pm. At that time, you’re kind of in for the night and I wasn’t looking forward to spending the next few hours outside, wrapped in a blanket in my skivvies.

But alarms in hotels are different. They are not meant to scare the life out of you, rather just to gently get your attention that something is not quite right.

At first I didn’t know what it was. I thought maybe the alarm was coming from somewhere in the room. In my sweep of the room, however, I realized it was clean and the noise was coming from out in the hall. Then a voice, that was muffled by our closed door, soothed us by telling us not to be alarmed, that they were investigating the problem, but not to use the elevators.

At that point, I casually went over to the door and looked at the map that indicated where we were and where the stairwell exits were. I took a careful mental note.

As I went back to the TV, I started to think about what I would take if we had to go. My computer was still in my backpack, so it would go with me. I was staying calm just like the nice man’s voice over the intercom was telling me to do about every three minutes.

Then I heard the fire engine sirens and I thought, “Hey, this might be the real thing.” Still not panicking, I started thinking about the lessons learned as a 5th grader at Rivercrest Public School.

We had to line up when the fire drill alarm resonated through the school halls. The teacher would get us ready, remind us of our exit, and to remain in single file.

I remember in high school, during a student protest, someone pulled the fire alarm and we all got out of class. That was exciting.

I was ready to run down the fourteen floors to the bottom if I had to. I often take the stairs when I make hospital visits. There’s been more than once that I’ve still been huffing and puffing walking into a patient’s room on the 10th floor.

Not long after the fire truck sirens stopped, the nice man’s voice said they had fixed the problem and thanked us for our patience. He had to repeat his announcement because the alarm sounded again!

Here’s the thing: Sometimes you just have to be ready for things that are unexpected and out of your control. You have to be able to roll with them. In life, we should be ready to meet God now, because we don’t know when things unexpected and out of our control might happen to us.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: In your experience, what has been your reaction to alarms? Leave your comment below.