relationships

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It Was A Different Story, But The Same Outcome

I read a story last night … something I haven’t done in years.

Let me explain: it was a children’s story and I read it to a couple of kids.

It’s been years since I’ve read a children’s story to kids, because it’s been years since our kids were little.

The story was new but some things were familiar, like my tendency to change things when I read them or add things to the story that aren’t there.

I actually have the reverse effect on kids that I’m supposed to have.

When our kids were little and I would read them stories, they would end up giggling and laughing and ready for a party to break out.

Lily would have to come along and settle them down for bedtime all over again.

Last night I found myself in that old, familiar situation. It was bedtime for a couple of kids Lily and I were babysitting for the night. … It was actually Lily doing the babysitting; I just came in at story time to give a hand … or maybe disrupt the flow.

Lil handed me the books, so I went into the living room and slumped on the couch. Two little creatures followed me and sat beside me, one on each side.

There were two stories, and they picked which one I would read first. So I began to read.

I was a little uncertain of how it would go; it had been so long and I felt out of practice. I also didn’t know what it would be like reading to someone else’s kids, but I got into the rhythm fairly quickly.

Back when our kids were little, I would stop on certain pages – the same pages every time, in fact – and make comments about the pictures. … A number of years later, our son was reading a story to younger kids at his school. When he got to the page I used to make comments on, he was shocked to find that those comments weren’t actually part of the story.

I’d also read things in the first person, or sometimes change the story just a little. That usually stirred the kids up.

Well, last night the reading was going on without a hitch … nothing to change, only a few comments to be made about the pictures.

Then I came across a word that triggered a song in my head.

Now I don’t know how many times these kids have had that story read to them, but I bet it was the first time that the reader broke out in a rendition of “May the bird of paradise fly up your nose.”

I think they made me sing it three or four times after that! I just hope those little guys’ parents will know what to do when those kids get home, hand them that story book and say, “sing the song”!

Well, it’s nice to know I haven’t lost my touch!

Lil had to do her magic once again. I walked by their room a few minutes after they left me, and she was telling them one of her calming, soothing stories to put them to sleep.

Here’s the thing: If you find that things have been strained with God, that maybe your time with Him has been non-existent recently, or that through disobedience you’ve felt far away, just come back to Him. When you do draw close to Him, you will find that familiar relationship you once had is back again. God never changes.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What memories of your time with God do you want to rekindle? Leave your comments below.

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Burdens Come Along Too Often

There should be limits to the number of burdens we carry for other people.

We all have to carry burdens in life; I know that, and I’m not talking about physical burdens.

I do remember way back when our kids were in elementary school. Their backpacks were larger than they were, and sometimes weighed about as much as they did.

One false step and they could fall over and turtle until someone could come to their rescue.

But I’m referring to the emotional burdens we carry.

It seems that these kinds of burdens always increase; the weight never or rarely gets lighter. As we get older our burdens increase.

… At least if you have children they increase.

When your kids are young, the emotional burden seems great, and it’s usually around life or death situations, like cuts and scrapes and stubborn wills.

We parents attach ourselves to our kids’ emotions and carry those burdens with us.

When there is a meltdown, we bear that burden until the tears are dried away.

Fortunately, the burdens are short-lived and can be left by the wayside. Unfortunately, when our children are young, the emotional burdens happen rapidly and frequently throughout a day.

It’s good we don’t have to carry them very long.

You might think that as children grow up those emotional burdens would get less and less as the child matures, and takes on more responsibility for his or her life.

But they don’t. The emotional burdens just become larger and longer lasting.

Now, I know we are to carry one another’s burdens – the Bible says we should. But how many burdens can you pile up on one person?

You go from worrying about the spat they had with their sibling, to what kind of a life partner they will find and when that will happen.

You carry the weight of their safety while driving a car you don’t think is that safe any more.  And you carry the burden of wondering how they will afford a new one.

You take on their burden of stress at work, and even the burden of showing up on time to events they have planned.

Our daughter was going to a friend’s wedding across the country. She booked a direct flight that would get her into the airport two and a half hours before the wedding. The wedding was a half hour or so away from the airport.

No problem. She would be picked up by a friend, taken to her hotel, and have enough time to change, do hair and makeup and drive to the wedding.

It was all good – no stress, no burden… until the plane was delayed from take off … twice!

Suddenly, we had the emotional burden for several hours of “Will she make it to the wedding?”

Well, hair was done in the Toronto airport, makeup was put on in the airplane lavatory, and the dress was put on in the Kelowna airport … just in time to be picked up and whisked to the wedding with a few minutes to spare.

Well, that emotional burden is over. I’d like a breather before the next one, thanks.

Here’s the thing: We are not only to carry one another’s burdens, but we are to give our burdens to God. So when you find yourself overwhelmed with emotional burdens, you’re over-burdened because you have kept picking them up without laying them down. Give your burdens – even the ones you carry for others – to God. It will give you greater capacity to keep carrying burdens.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What heavy burden do you need to give to God? Leave your comments below.

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I Don’t Want A Negative Opinion

Yesterday I started to form a negative opinion of a restaurant I actually like.

My opinion is based on an experience – if fact, my last experience at this chain of restaurants.

My wife, Lily, and I were traveling and needed to stop for gas and something to eat. I noticed a “Five Guys” burger place close to where we were gassing up, so when the tank was filled we made our way over.

When you have eaten in a restaurant before – maybe many times before – you kind of have an expectation of how things will go … especially in a chain restaurant where they try to create the same eating experience in every franchise they establish.

When we entered, there were several people in the order line ahead of us. It seemed like the two guys ordering at the counter either didn’t know what they wanted or were ordering for an army.

Turns out they didn’t know what to order. It’s a burger joint; they make burgers – no chicken, no fish, just burgers.

How hard is it to order a burger? I’m sure it wasn’t their first burger.

… But that wasn’t the issue. After the cashier finished with that marathon two-burger order, she disappeared.

I couldn’t remember what she looked like because she wasn’t quite as tall as the cash register so I never got a good look at her from my position fourth in line.

Close to five minutes went by before she returned to the cash and started to serve the next guest in line.

By the time we placed our order, we had been in line close to fifteen minutes.

Now if we were eating at the Keg, and waited fifteen minutes to order, I wouldn’t think anything of it. But this was a burger place … did I mention they only make burgers?

Then we waited for our food.

We had to clear our own table because obviously the paid staff weren’t doing the job. I picked the cleanest table and then wiped it down with some napkins.

When we finally got our food and started to eat, Lily and I began to reminisce about some of our other restaurant experiences.

We had a doozy a few years ago at a Burger King that has been etched in my mind forever.

That experience was almost matched at another Burger King, so now I can’t go into a Burger King without thinking something is going to go wrong.

I know Five Guys is a good restaurant and their food tastes great; I just don’t want my latest experience to taint this opinion.

They say it takes seven compliments to undue one negative one. I’m wondering if the same is true with an eating experience.

If so, I need to get back to “Five Guys” seven more times so that what happened yesterday doesn’t jade my opinion of a restaurant I actually really like.

Here’s the thing: You may have had an experience in your life where you blamed God or felt God didn’t treat you the way He should. Be careful not to let your view of that experience taint your opinion of God who is holy, good and all powerful. He’s God and He loves you and has a plan for you. Remember who He is and keep going back to Him. Don’t let one experience taint your opinion and keep you from seeking Him.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What experience with God in the past has given you confidence in Him? Leave your comments below.

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To Share Life, Some Old Barriers Must Be Crossed

We can now share life with others like never before, but there still remain some old barriers.

I remember when I went away to college years ago. Back then you were cut off from what your family was doing until you went back home.

Sure, we could send and receive letters in the mail to keep up with life on the other side of the country, but by the time we got it, it was old news.

We could call on the telephone, but with the time zone differences and the long distance charges, at least with my family, it was a rare, “special occasion only” form of connecting.

It’s not like that today. We have all kinds of social media and communication technology at our disposal. We can share life with anyone, any family member, no matter where they or we may be.

Distance is no longer a factor to sharing life.

Just the other day, on Canada Day, my wife, Lily, convinced me to stay downtown and watch the fireworks even though I like to be home Saturday night before I preach the next day.

We stood for a long time on a pier waiting for the big event to happen. We figured it would be a good show since it was Canada’s 150th birthday.

We arrived at the pier in daylight with really no one around us, but as the sun went down, more and more people crowded around to get a good spot to watch the fireworks.

Our son was in town and managed a great vantage point, with some friends, on a boat in the harbour.

When the light show began, Lily thought she would video some of it and send it to our daughter, Karlie, in Toronto.

But then she thought, “Why don’t I just video chat the whole thing!”

It was pretty neat. We were standing on a pier in Kingston, holding a phone so that Karlie could watch the fireworks from another city. We could converse with her and see her just like she was standing with us.

In that moment we were sharing life together … even though she was 250 kilometres away.

It’s truly incredible that we now have the ability to carry on with others far away as if they were right next to us.

But even with all this ability to share life, sometimes we have a hard time communicating thoughts and emotions that are inside us.

And it doesn’t matter if a person is beside us or in another country – no amount of technology or social media will cut through the difficulty of sharing parts of our lives with others.

That old saying “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink” describes the barrier that will always exist regardless of how our communication progresses.

We can share life together wherever we are, and yet not really share life at all.

Here’s the thing: Some of us find it difficult to share what’s going on inside us – sometimes we can’t even put a finger on what we are experiencing. Though sharing life experiences is important, it’s equally important to share your thoughts and feelings. The great news is there is an avenue for that. God is listening and wants you to share those thoughts and feelings with Him. He can also provide you with great counsel if you will learn to listen as He shares with you.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you used technology to share life with someone? Leave your comments below.

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A Canada Look-Back, I Mean Ahead

On July 1 we celebrated all that has made Canada what it is today. This was our 150th birthday.

I’ve only shared 61 of those birthdays with the country, but just writing that puts it in perspective how young a country we live in.

I’m only 14 years shy of being half as old as Canada. Wow!

My grandmother – if she was still alive today – would have only been 17 years younger than our nation. Now that would be impressive! My grandmother passed away in 1983 at the age of 99.

It’s all nice to look back on your birthday, but I want to look ahead in this piece.

When I think of Canada’s 150th, it brings a few questions to my mind that I wonder about.

One question I have is, “Will the Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup in the next 150 years?”

It’s been 50 years since their last victory, but lately they seem to be making some moves in the right direction. I can wait a long time for it to happen, but I don’t have 150 years left in me.

I also wonder, “Will Donald Trump last 4 years in office, or will he even last the year?”

I get a CNN feed on my Apple Watch and 95% of the news that shows up is related to Donald Trump. I have never seen the news/entertainment industry so captivated with one person before.

Trump is like the Beatles were in the 60’s; no one could get enough of them.

As I watched TV and saw a protest on Parliament Hill, one question that came to mind was, “Will we ever come to a resolution with our Indigenous Peoples of Canada?”

The Prime Minister sat with the leaders in a teepee they had set up on the Parliament lawn. When he left, the Indigenous leaders were all encouraged and felt he had heard their heart. But a few hours later the protesters were trying to set up another teepee on the lawn.

I wonder if any real progress will be made on this issue in the next 150 years.

In light of global warming, my questions is, “Will the weathermen become more accurate in predicting rain and snow, or will the forecasts remain much the same – wrong about 50% of the time?”

Another question I have is, “With all the rights various groups have now, will we become cookie-cutter people, forced to think, talk and act like each other? … You know, shades of Orwell’s “1984”.

If that happens, it will cut down on the myriad of choices we have to make now. Things like fashion, interests, and food might not be all that exciting, but we won’t need an opinion; we will all share the same one.

Just think, when you need to buy a car, there would only be a few choices: Will that be a compact, mid-size or SUV?

I’m not convinced that what got us through the last 150 years will carry us on into the next. We are venturing into new territory.

Here’s the thing: We may have many questions about the future of our country and life in this great land of ours. We can’t foresee the answers to many of our questions, but there is an outcome that has already been determined. When Jesus died on the cross for mankind’s sins, He said He is coming back to take those who put their faith in Him to be with Him in heaven. That we can have confidence in. Make sure your faith is based in Christ because you can count on God to know the future.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What questions do you have about the next 150 years? Leave your comments below.

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I Think I Can Squeeze A Car Wash In Today

I think I will wash my car today. It could really use one; it’s been a while.

I have this power washer that I don’t seem to use very much. When I look at it, I have a desire to use it, but I never seem to get around to it.

Today will be the day that I get it out and spray down my car. It’s a good day to do it because we are in between rain days … and, if I wash the car early enough, I will have a good portion of the day to enjoy it before we get back into some lousy weather.

When I was in college, I was a professional car washer. I had a job with UPS washing their vehicles each night when they would return from delivering packages.

In those days that was the only form of advertising the company did. They believed that clean trucks communicated care – if they took care of their vehicles, they would also care for their packages.

Every evening I would wash down a dozen or more vans. I became rather quick at washing them too, so you’d think washing my car each week would be a cinch!

Well, it doesn’t seem to be that way. Though I like the look of my power washer, and have a desire to use it, I never really feel like I have the time at the moment to use it.

It’s always something I would like to do, when I have a little time.

The thing is there is always something else I need to or should be doing.

Sometimes when I fill the gas tank I run the car through the car wash there. The one by my place is quick and, like using my power washer, it doesn’t touch the car with brushes.

Opinions vary though. Some people think it’s best that a car wash not have brushes because they can scratch your car and rip off your side mirrors and antenna. Others say that if there are no brushes the car wash won’t do a good job of getting the dirt off your car.

I remember being in a discussion on which system was better. When my brother-in-law, who worked for Petro Canada overseeing the car washes in the region, was brought into the discussion, he simply said, “Oh, we touch your car all over the place!”

My neighbour across the street washes his car regularly by hand, but I like the idea of using my power washer. You don’t have to get so up close and personal with the vehicle, and you get to use a tool.

For me, washing my car is about using the washer as much as it is about getting the car clean.

I hope the sun stays out today because I am really talking myself into power washing some dirt off my car.

Here’s the thing: There are things in life that we have access to but never get around to. We might even like the idea, but never find the right time. If God is calling you to something, wanting you to move in a direction, don’t keep putting it off. If Christ is calling you to give Him your life, find the time, make a decision and trust your life to Him. There is no sense in not doing what’s available to you. You never know when it won’t be available any more.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to act on today that you might be tempted to put off again?  Leave your comments below.

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It Was A Plan B Picnic

Our annual church picnic turned out to be a big hit in more ways than one.

We hold a picnic every year in June; we’ve been doing it for years. This year, however, there was a little hiccup to putting it on.

We normally get a permit to hold it in the park. That permit gives us control of the large stone BBQ pit and covered pavilion … oh ya, and access to the baseball diamond.

This year we couldn’t get the permit. Some other organization must have beat us to it.

Our options were to either just show up at a park, bring our own BBQ’s and have our picnic, or to hold it at our church. We have a large lawn behind the church with trees along the edges.

Well, we decided to go with the church lawn as the site of this year’s picnic. It was easy to get people to come since we hold it right after our service on Sunday.

But the downside was that we don’t have any of the features of a park, like a climbing centre for kids or a ball diamond. We don’t even have swings.

So we purchased a jump and slide castle for the little ones, and came up with several games we could play on the field.

The week before the picnic, I sensed God speak to me about inviting the people around the church, and giving out free hamburgers.

I told the congregation and everyone thought that was a great idea.

Since our church boarders on three streets and we are across from a shopping centre, there is a lot of vehicle and pedestrian traffic that goes by our church.

What we decided to do was put up signs along the road, that just said, “Free BBQ. Come on over.”

Not only did our congregation get to enjoy hamburgers, salads, cake and desserts, but so did many people from our neighbourhood.

Maybe what put a smile on my face more than anything else was seeing people in our congregation interacting with those who stopped by.

People weren’t shy to chat it up, and the fact that the food was free made them all the more curious to talk and ask questions.

Several moms came with their kids and, of course, the kids wanted to jump in the castle and play the games.

The one thing we didn’t have, though, was a petting zoo. … Apparently there were a few moms and kids who came because they had seen on Facebook that the church had a petting zoo.

That was unfortunate for the church around the corner. I guess we got some of their potential guests.

When it was all said and done, it was a great day. People were well fed, had fun, socialized and we made contact with a lot of people we might never have met.

Maybe next year we need to offer pony rides. Just kidding.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes in life you can get discouraged when Plan A doesn’t work out and you have to resort to Plan B or C. The thing is our Plan B might just be God’s Plan A all along and we didn’t know it. God can turn any plan into the right plan if we choose to listen to His direction.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Have you had a Plan B that turned out to be Plan A? Leave your comments below.

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Dad’s Day – What A Memory

It’s Saturday and I just got a Canadian Tire ad on my phone for Dad’s day.

The ad said I only had one day left and they had gift ideas for every type of dad.

It got me reflecting on what type of dad I was. As my mind wandered around our local Canadian Tire store, I thought, “Am I an automotive type of dad, or a fishing and hunting type of dad?”

I could be a hardware, fix-it-yourself type of dad or maybe a gardening and outdoor living type of dad.

Out of all the sections in that store, I would have to say I’m more the sports type of dad.

But Canadian Tire is just selling products a dad might like; that is not really the type of dad I am.

When I look back on how I’ve interacted with my kids, that would be a better indicator of what type of dad I am. Now that my kids are adults, there’s a lot of time to look back on.

I spent time playing with them … even if some of that play time was them playing on and around my body while I napped.

I read stories to my kids at bedtime … so what if I changed the stories a bit and got them all hyped up instead of settled down to sleep?

I helped my kids with a whole variety of things from learning things, to figuring out things, to making things. … That “ab dolly” Mike and I made – though it didn’t turn out so well as a workout machine, it has come in handy over the years assisting in moving things from one spot to another.

As a dad, I showed up to games and tournaments to cheer on my kids. I even did some coaching in the early years. It was always great to watch my kids compete and play hard at whatever sport they were in.

My kids got to see me at work more than most kids get to see their dads, and they also spent time with me while I did my devotions early in the mornings.

I’ll never forget when my then 5 year old son sat next to me one morning while I was writing in my journal. When I’d written over a page he asked me, “Dad, why are you scribbling?”

I replied, “I’m not scribbling, I’m writing.” He shook his head and said, “You’re scribbling, Dad.”

… There are still adults who think the same thing about my writing.

When I look back though, what stands out to me is that the time went by too fast and I missed doing way more than I did.

And one more thing, I should have talked to my kids more. I answered a lot of their questions, responded to them and showed interest in what they were doing, but I didn’t share my heart with them as much as I should have.

They could have gotten a better understanding of my relationship with God than I let them in on.

You can’t go back, but I do have the future. I need to let them in on that side more.

Here’s the thing: We can’t go back and do things differently, but we have the future and we can start from here to do things with our kids, to help them and share our hearts with them so that they know what makes our faith tick.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to start doing from now on with your kids? Leave your comments below.

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I Never Thought I’d Like This

This is a repost of a blog post I published in June 2013

I find it interesting that you can trick yourself into liking something you don’t really like – in this case, something you don’t usually like doing. Recently, I bought a new weed trimmer.

This garden tool goes by several names, “weed-whacker”, “weed-eater”, “whipper-snipper”, and I’m sure there are a few more.

Regardless of the name, they don’t really have anything to do with weeds. They are designed to trim the long strands of grass that grow along the edge of your lawn that your lawn mower can’t get.

Now, I don’t really like yard work. I cut the grass when it needs it, but while I’m cutting the front lawn, I keep looking at the basketball hoop in my driveway thinking, “It’d be nice to take some shots right now.” Funny thing is, it’s the only time I have that urge. When I’m done cutting the lawn I no longer have the desire to make a few hoops.

I can think of a million things I could be doing when I have to do yard work, and none of them include taking care of or maintaining anything growing around my property.

So it really surprised me the other day when I got my new cordless … we’ll call it “grass trimmer”, and was anxious to get out there and start using it. The really amazing thing was that not once did I have the urge to put it down and pick up a basketball.

My new trimmer is fantastic! I can push two buttons in and turn the bottom part so it can be used as a edger. I have never edged anything in my life so it came as a real revelation that edging really makes your lawn look good.

When I was all finished I went in the house and looked out the window at how stunning my walkway looked leading up to our front door.

I used my knew toy . . . err . . . a . . . I mean, tool to trim both front and back yards and the battery didn’t die before I was done. It normally takes me about 25 to 30 minutes to cut my lawn, front and back. And usually I can’t wait to get back to doing pretty much anything else.

I even got out my leaf blower afterwards to blow away the grass that blew onto the cement walk and the driveway just so that it looked neat and showed off my trim work.

The only thing that I am concerned about is how long my new found infatuation will last.  This baby is new but how will I feel about using it when it’s another week old or in three months?

By the end of the summer will I be wishing the battery isn’t charged so I don’t have to get out there and trim? Will I be looking longingly over at my basketball hoop and accidentally cut the tops off my wife’s flowers?  I don’t know.

But I do know that my wife, Lily is happy right now and I’m liking the look of my lawn.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes a fresh look at something can give us new inspiration or cause us to find new meaning. Whether it’s a familiar Bible passage, or an old problem, or whether it is God Himself, take a fresh approach and you might be surprised to find something you really like.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you found a new enjoyment or appreciation for? Leave your question below.

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I Had To Wonder If I Was Still Alive

The other day I had to pinch myself to see if I was still alive. That’s right, it was a scary moment for me.

A few weeks ago I had to renew my driver’s license. I filled out the paper work, got my picture taken and then waited for my new license to arrive in the mail.

Well, it arrived alright and when I looked at the picture on my new license, I wasn’t a hundred percent sure that the picture of the guy on the license wasn’t dead!

That’s when I pinched myself.

My eyes were open in the picture but that was the only thing that made the picture look like there was possible life there.

I understand the aging process, but how do you go from looking like you were alive five years ago to dead now?

There were some other factors that came into play with the picture, the main factor being the quality of the photo.

I’ve stepped into one of those shopping mall photo booths before, and for a couple of bucks you get a string of pictures that are pretty poor in quality.

The thing is you are usually making funny faces so, first of all, you look like you are alive, and second, your face is lit up by the flash so that you can tell the blood is still flowing through your veins.

When I got my driver’s license, there was a flash that nearly blinded me but it didn’t brighten anything up. The fact that the license is grey in colour only accentuates the lifeless look of the picture.

The next time I have to get a new driver’s license I’m going to put on makeup. I don’t have bags under my eyes but apparently under certain conditions I do!

The worker who was serving me wasn’t a photographer – I realize that. She did warn me not to smile, but come on! When she looked at the picture on the screen, why didn’t she gasp and say, “We better take that one again, sir. You look like you’re dead.”

I think if I worked at it I could look a little cheery even without smiling. I just needed a second chance.

I’m the one who’s carrying around the picture of the dead guy in my wallet for the next five years. You would think they could turn the screen around and ask me if I was okay with that picture before it was printed and laminated on my card.

I hope I don’t get pulled over by the police because I might get arrested for driving with no vital signs!

I’m thinking maybe I should try to photoshop my driver’s license. Then I could add a smile and cover up the bags under my eyes.

Maybe all I need to do is add a twinkle in my eyes to show I’m still kicking.

Don’t give up on me.

Here’s the thing: There are many people who are walking around like they are alive but a picture of their souls would prove that they were really dead spiritually. When you physically die, it’s too late to change the condition of your soul. The great thing is that while you are still physically alive, trusting your life to Christ will change the condition of your soul and give it life – life that you will keep right through eternity.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is the condition of your soul? Leave your comments below.