relationships

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My To-do’s Are Never Ending

Recently I had a to-do list that I was trying to work through – the only problem was that it kept expanding. For every item I crossed off the list, I added one or two more to it.

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When I have a list of things I have to do, there is no greater pleasure for me than to be able to check those items off the list when they are completed.

And to be honest, when I check something off a to-do list, I give it more than a check. When I make the list out by hand, on a piece of paper, I don’t usually put a check mark beside the item when I’ve done the task … I obliterate it from the paper!

It’s like I don’t want to be reminded of what it was that I’d just finished. I draw lines through it about a dozen times so that the best intelligence agent could not decipher what lies beneath the pen strokes.

But I find that I only use pen and paper when I’m in a time crunch and all the to-do’s need to be completed by a deadline. Otherwise, I use a task app which puts a nice little check beside each item and fades the type for a while before it totally disappears. The app is called “Nozbe” and it’s a great little task manager.

This week I’m in one of those time crunches and so out came the lined paper and a pen to scratch out my to-do’s.

The first day I made some progress … not as much as I’d hoped, but I was able to almost rip through the paper with my lines on a few of the tasks.

The next day didn’t turn out as well. I was able to obliterate two items from my list but had to add three more that also needed to be finished by the deadline.

One of the items came as a by-product of completing a task. It was one of those,”well I did this, which means now I have to do that” kind of thing.

Another task was something new that came up. It didn’t really matter; it all felt the same. My list was not getting smaller.

I was inclined to give up on the list all together and just do what came to mind until the deadline, but that would cause me greater grief in the end.

That’s the problem with to-do lists: they don’t end! There is always another thing that needs to be taken care of.

Right now I’m going through my list to determine if there are some things that can wait, and be completed after my deadline.

What would make me happiest is to know that I have gotten to the end of my to-do list. So before I add anything else to the list, I will destroy my current task sheet and start a new one … after my deadline.

Here’s the thing: We need a sense of completion with things, whether it is a to-do list or reading the Bible. When you have a goal in mind, I would suggest that you set up a reading plan and work to complete it before you start your next plan. That way your Bible reading won’t seem never-ending but will have a start and finish date. Then move on to the next plan.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you gain a sense of completion with your Bible reading? Leave your comment below.

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The Season Is Over!

It’s been a long season, but now, in mid April, thoughts are turning to new things suited for warmer temperatures.

That’s right, the hockey season has come to an end for me.

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You might think it’s the end because the NHL’s regular season is over and the Toronto Maple Leafs didn’t make the playoffs again this year. … The only good thing about that is that none of the other Canadian teams made the playoffs either, so I’m not hearing the usual spring jokes about the Leafs hitting the golf course early.

The real reason hockey is over for me is that the OHL’s Kingston Frontenacs were ousted from the playoffs tonight in the second round.

I’ve been the chaplain of the team for the last two years, so I’m pretty attached to this group. I’ve met with them weekly and attended most of their home games. I know how hard it is for them to be done after having such a great season.

As a team they set several records. They finished first in their conference and also had a decisive win in the opening series of the playoffs.

Now a few guys who have completed their junior careers will have to move on to new chapters in their lives.

In September it won’t be “pick up where we left off”, it will be “start all over and try to prove ourselves once again”.

For me, it’s no more chapels, no more trips down to the arena to chat, no more Friday night games, and no more pizza for the guys … well, at least until next season.

It was a long season but I was willing to go for another month or so. I’ll be out in Calgary in May and I understand the Memorial Cup is in Red Deer this year. I would have gladly driven the hour and a half from Cowtown to see the boys play if they had have made it.

Not now though. It’s all over. I’ll probably have a few more games of pick up hockey before I dry out my equipment for the year. And unlike some people in Canada who will not be watching the NHL playoffs, I will.

I don’t just watch hockey because I like a team; I like hockey, therefore I will watch it.

I just find this year a little tougher to let go than other years. I had such high hopes for the “Fronts”. I really care about those guys and I know they must be feeling pretty low.

I just hope I get a chance to say goodbye to them before they all disperse to their home towns. I’m so proud of them and all they accomplished this year. … Get your sights fixed on next year!

In a couple of weeks, I will be playing golf and mountain biking and this hockey season will be long behind everyone. We will move on; reset for the fall.

Here’s the thing: You can work really hard for a long time, and then stumble. In the moment, it seems like there is no way forward, that all is a loss. But the Lord is a forgiving God, and He longs for you to come to Him and reset your soul. Don’t stay discouraged; run to God and get moving on a new season.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to run to God for right now to get moving again? Leave your comment below.

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It’s Time To Look Back And Reminisce

Have you ever done something for a long time and then looked back and reminisced about it?

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Well, I did that this week. On April 1st I celebrated 20 years as the pastor of my church. It sure seems like a milestone to me … and that’s no April Fool’s joke!

Nineteen years didn’t seem to be that big a deal, but twenty does. There is only one place in which I have lived longer, and that’s Toronto.

At 25 I left Toronto for school in Regina to be a youth pastor … with many questions and fears, but no other desire than to work my whole career with junior and senior high students.

Being five to seven years older than most of my freshmen class, however, I wasn’t so sure becoming a youth pastor at 29 would be something anyone else would think was a good idea.

All along the way though, my call continually reminded me that this was not something I had dreamed up for myself; it was God’s idea. Whenever I got to wondering about my future, there was always some confirmation that kept me going.

After getting to my first church, I didn’t think I was going to last there very long … the first two years were pretty tumultuous. Again God worked and I ended up being one of my senior pastor’s longest serving assistant pastors, and the longest lasting youth pastor he’d ever hired.

During my time there, I worked with over 25 pastoral staff, and over 30 office and secretarial staff. It wasn’t an easy decision to leave there after eleven years.

God once again was so clear in His direction, however, that I had to pursue a role as a senior pastor.

I remember being interviewed for the position at my present church, and at one point I was given an opportunity to ask some of the congregation how they saw the church in five years.

I will never forget the first answer someone gave. It was simply, “looking for another pastor”. I quickly responded to her by saying, “I hope not”.

Well, that was a long time ago, and I’m still here. I’m not sure, though, where the person is who made that comment.

I remember as a youth pastor when I was given opportunities to preach, I was always up really late the night before trying to finish my sermon. In those days I still had my full time work to do and had to squeeze sermon prep into an already busy schedule.

Still, coming to Kingston, I was concerned that I would be burning the midnight oil on Saturday nights, cramming hard to get that last illustration into my message. I was concerned enough to tell God I wouldn’t be able to do the job if that’s what would happen.

Now as I look back, there may have been a few times – but less than 5 in 20 years – that that happened, and all because of extenuating circumstances.

The last 20 years haven’t all been easy, but I’ve clearly seen God’s hand on my life and ministry over that time. Thanks, Lord.

Here’s the thing: The most important thing I did 20 years ago was obey God’s voice and the direction He gave me. If you will hear God speak, and obey what He tells you, I’m confident that God’s hand will be on your life and ministry too, whether that is in the market place or as a full time vocation.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you known when God was telling you to do something? Leave your comment below.

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When The Conversation Is Out Of Your Control

Conversations usually flow from one topic to another at a gathering, but when the party is heavy on the testosterone you lose all control of the dialogue.

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That would be how I would describe our Easter dinner this year.

In my last post (read it here), I wrote about our plans for Easter dinner and said that in this post I would write about how it turned out.

Lily was sort of forced to buy a thirty pound turkey because that was the only size she could find at the grocery store. To save me from having to eat turkey for the next six months, she came up with a plan to invite some people who knew how to finish off a ton of food.

We invited two players from the Kingston Frontenacs hockey team, and two of our son Mike’s friends.

That gave us five guys 25 and under, myself, Lily and our daughter, Karlie. When it came to the food, Lily and Karlie didn’t stand a chance. And when it came to the conversation, the guys monopolized that too.

Easter is a time when our focus is on the resurrection of Christ, the price He paid for our sins and the amazing gift of a relationship with God that Christ offers us.

However, some of our company had just come back from an afternoon of riding quads on muddy trails, so naturally the boys needed to spend some time rehashing all the ups and downs of the episode.

Some of our conversation around the dinner table focussed on the more spectacular antics on the quads, getting stuck, who almost died on the outing and who made the biggest fool of themselves.

I’m not much into that sport; in fact, I’ve never ridden a quad before. I have, however, ridden my mountain bike on some pretty muddy trails, so I was all ears as we listened to the exchange among the guys. Voices and laughter seemed to get louder as the stories turned to the personal shortcomings of one and all.

At Easter dinner there is nothing wrong with diverting from the main theme of the day, but hey, we also had some hockey players with us who are right in the middle of the OHL playoffs.

Everyone wanted to know how they were feeling about the series and how they thought it would turn out. We analyzed the team and talked about old hockey stories that related.

Of course, on any hockey team there are some characters that stand out. And just like with the boys who went quading, there were moments in the conversation that focussed on some of the crazy antics that happen within a hockey club.

By the time dinner was over, there was a table full of stuffed people who barely had room for dessert.

Though we didn’t really talk about the Easter message – other than a quick explanation and saying grace – most of the guys felt like they’d been verbally crucified by the others over the course of the meal … not typical for an Easter dinner, but typical when you gather five young men around the same table and bring food into the mix.

Here’s the thing: When guys get talking the stories can become bigger and better. The biggest story in the history of the world, however, is the love God has shown us in sending His only Son to die on a cross so that you and I can have a relationship with Him. There is no bigger story!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you relate to the biggest story in history? Leave your comment below.

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The Turkey Was Meant To Be

Some things are meant to be. You don’t always know why at the time, but it makes sense later.

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For Easter dinner this year Lily decided to cook a turkey. She went out and bought a thirty pounder.

Some farmers try to plump up their turkeys before they get to market. I think Lily’s trying to plump up the family, but I’m not sure for what!

Thirty pounds of turkey split four ways … well, you do the math. I’d have to play a lot of hockey AND be on my rowing machine for a couple of weeks to get rid of all that extra weight that would be showing up on my scale each morning.

To be fair to Lily, she didn’t look for a thirty pound turkey; it’s all she could find in the store. She was forced into it.

Nevertheless, we needed to do something to cut down on that total turkey intake we were looking at on Easter Sunday.

We knew Karlie was coming home and would participate in the feast but probably to a minimal degree. Mike would also be home for Easter dinner, and that would mean lots of potatoes and gravy, too.

That left Lily and I to clean up the rest and I wasn’t looking forward to eating leftovers for the next month. I like turkey leftovers, but there is a limit to how long I really want to be eating them.

Lil also has this volunteer position as a chef for a major frozen food company that helps with leftovers. I believe it’s called “Lil’s kitchen creations.”

She’s been doing this for a year now. She cooks a large meal, more than we can eat, and then makes up single serving containers of the meal which she freezes and delivers to her mother, and sometimes Karlie and Mike.

Well, with a thirty pound turkey, that’s a lot of frozen meals, even if they are spread around to others.

Lil needed a plan for this meal and so she started thinking of who else she could invite. She did the smartest thing: she invited some young guys over.

There were a couple of Kingston Frontenac hockey players on the list. Young guys in their late teens are much like chocolate Easter bunnies: they are hollow inside, perfect for hiding a lot of turkey and stuffing.

… I remember the days when I could hide a lot of food. But those days are long gone. I need to get on my stationary bike for twenty minutes after a turkey dinner or else I’m looking at buying a new belt!

Lil figured that if she also invited Mike’s roommate and another of his friends, they would be able to do damage to the turkey. Guys in their mid twenties have had lots of practice putting away large volumes of food; they know where to put that stuff.

So we were all set. The distribution of thirty pounds of turkey was accounted for. … I’ll let you know in my next post how it all turned out (read it here).

Here’s the thing: You have to make the best of what you have. And when you have plenty, you need to spread it around. At Easter we have the greatest message there is: Jesus died for our sins so that we can be forgiven, and because He rose from the grave, we can have a relationship with God and heaven waiting for us. That’s a large meal that needs to be shared with others.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who can you share the message of Easter with? Leave your comment below.

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A Baptism By Fire!

Have you heard the phrase “baptism by fire” before? It has come to mean someone’s initiation into something new.

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Many of us have had experiences like it when we began a new job or joined a new group, and were thrown into a task, leadership position, or project right away with no time to settle in.

The term “baptism by fire” was first used this way in the military around 1822 and referred to a soldier’s first time in battle.

But the original expression comes from the Bible in Matthew 3:11 where John the Baptist says, “He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.” It refers to Jesus convicting people of their sin, of righteousness and judgement.

Years ago I had an experience that included all the meanings of this phrase.

I was a youth pastor and on one Sunday was going to baptize 13 teens, one in the first service and 12 in the second.

Some churches baptize people by sprinkling them with water, sort of like the first few drops in a light rain shower.

Not our church – we get you all wet, from head to toe. It’s baptism by immersion. It symbolizes that your old life is buried as you go under the water, and you have a new life in Christ Jesus when you come up out of the water.

When instructing teens, I would often tell them, “I’ll hold you under longer if you don’t pay attention” … I was just kidding.

I’ve baptized people in rivers, lakes, and an ocean. Sometimes the water’s been freezing, but this time it was hot – real hot!

I was ready to go into the baptism tank in that church, which was like a large, rectangular hot tub, without the jets. But as soon as my toe touched the water, I immediately jumped back, because it was burning hot!

I didn’t know what to do. I tried to go into the water a little way but came out; it was so hot.

I knew the teen’s mom was in the service specifically to see her son get baptized. The lead pastor was wrapping up the announcements and about to introduce the baptism.

I had to make a split-second decision. Knowing there was no way to tell anyone the temperature of the water, I went for it.

I waded into the water and made my way around the screen and into view of the audience. The water came up to just below my chest and it was scalding.

I’m not exactly sure what the temperature was, but the caretaker later said the hot water tank was set at 140 degrees, so it must have been somewhere between 120 and 140 in there.

It was so hot I could hardly spit out my introductory words. But in walked my victim … I mean, the young man to be baptized.

I stood there listening to his short testimony, but every time I even twitched, it felt like flames were coming up my legs.

When he got through talking, I put him under the water and back up again in record time. Then I almost pushed him out of that tank!

… My skin was beat red from 9:30 in the morning until about 2:30 in the afternoon.

Here’s the thing: For any baptism by fire, you’re glad when it’s done but you’re also thankful for the experience. Although Christ convicts of sin, righteousness and judgement, if you receive His forgiveness, you’re so thankful to experience that baptism by fire.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: What’s your baptism by fire story? Leave your comment below.

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Has A Problem Got You Stalled?

This week I had a problem that put me in stall mode. What I mean is that I couldn’t go forward or backward until I figured out my problem.

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Another time this happened to me was when I was finishing our basement. I had framed a few walls but then I got to a section that I didn’t know what to do with.

So I left it; I was stalled. I didn’t do any work on the basement for about a month. I just didn’t know how to proceed.

Finally Lily said, “That’s enough!” and she got a guy in and paid him to finish the framing.

I didn’t solve my problem, but the problem got solved.

It worked out great in that instance, but what if you can’t just turn your problem over to someone else? What if you are the only one who must solve the problem?

I ran into that this week working on my sermon. I got to a spot and realized that I wasn’t sure what the text was really saying.

I re-read the text over and over, looked at all the commentaries, and checked various translations of the Bible to get a different perspective on the text. I even listened to a guy preach a sermon on that text.

But nothing seemed to help me solve my problem. In all my research, they hinted at answering my issue but nothing I read or listened to gave a definitive answer.

It was like they all beat around the bush on the subject.

Still I couldn’t move forward on my sermon until I solved my question about the text.

I felt handcuffed, in prison, unable to free myself from my cell. It was like I was paralyzed and couldn’t move.

I couldn’t enjoy anything; my mind kept coming back to the subject. I was discouraged, filled with doubt. I was down, really down.

My wife, Lily, and I went to a hockey game to get my mind off my problem, to brighten my day.

The game was great; it was exciting. Our team won, but I still had my problem churning inside of me, not letting me escape its clutches.

I felt like Jonah in the Bible – no matter how far I ran from my trouble, I couldn’t outrun it; I couldn’t escape it.

I needed to preach something on Sunday regardless of whether or not I solved the text. That deadline only added to my tension.

What I was looking for was a definitive response to the text from a respected (by me) Bible scholar. And there wasn’t one to be found.

And that’s what froze me. I didn’t trust my interpretation. I didn’t want to risk that I might be wrong.

It’s a tough place to be in when you are unsure of yourself and are afraid of making a mistake. It’s a lonely place to be, with no hope on the horizon.

Here’s the thing: We all find ourselves in that place at one time or another. It’s a tough place to be in, but God can solve your problem if you will ask Him. Listen to His solution and then, in confidence or trepidation, follow through on His solution. For me the confidence came as I followed through.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has paralyzed you in the past? How did you get unstuck? Leave your comment below.

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Is Technology Making You Irrelevant? 

I’m a little concerned with where technology is leading us. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all “teched” up to the hilt in my world, but I don’t know how long I can keep going.

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I’m not concerned that computers stop being more and more useful; it’s that I don’t like the changes I have to keep making.

Software has to continually be kept up with or we appear to be old fashioned.

I experienced that the other day. People looked at me like I was from the dark ages because I didn’t have a certain app on my phone.

I was making arrangements to pay a guy for hockey, and he said, “Just send the money via etransfer.”

I replied that I didn’t really do that kind of thing … that’s when the looks started flashing around the room.

It seemed like I was the only one who didn’t use this form of money transfer.

My son just smiled and shook his head. He didn’t say it but I knew he was thinking, “Man, my dad is an old guy”.

He did ask, “Don’t you have the banking app?”, to which I responded, “What’s the banking app?” At that point I could tell his thoughts were, “It’s useless. He’s too old to understand this stuff.”

I know, in that moment, Mike was contemplating the next 20 years of helping me, holding my hand as the computer age passes me by.

I’ve watched that movie before! … only I was the one who had to hold my dad’s hand as he struggled to do some of the simple things on a computer.

I guess it happens to us all eventually. But I’m a computer guy and I don’t feel like I’m out of touch with what’s going on in the computer world.

I just don’t think I need to jump down every rabbit hole that technology is taking us on.

There are areas that I’m quite happy to leave alone, and leave for others to use. One of those areas has to do with my money and transactions.

There is something in me that likes to be the one who takes MY money out of MY bank account. I don’t like it when someone else – either the bank or a merchant – takes my money out of my account for me.

Now I’ll have to get used to etransfer or the computer age will pass me by.

I just don’t like where computers are leading us. I shouldn’t be considered out of touch or too old to figure it out because I don’t use a certain method of payment.

At the end of our conversation, Mike said he would do the transfer. That sounded perfect to me because the money would be coming out of his bank account!

I told him, “That works for me. I’ll just subtract that amount from the tab you’ve got going with me.”

Here’s the thing: Most of us want to remain relevant in this world. As you consider staying relevant spiritually, remember that God never changes. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. You can always reach Him in the same way; He’s always reachable by prayer.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: In what area do you fear becoming irrelevant? Leave your comment below.

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Don’t Be A Whiner!

Let’s not be whiners. I know there is a great temptation to be one because of the weather, but let’s suck it up. Let’s be brave and face the cold – let’s be Canadian!

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I think global warming is having some serious negative effects all over the world. One of those negatives is convincing Canadians our positional latitude is quite a few degrees lower than it really is.

We don’t live in North Carolina, people! When we get a blast of winter’s harshest, we shouldn’t get all whiny and complaining and stay indoors until spring. We live in the North – period.

Yesterday was an Alberta-like winter day in Kingston, Ontario. By that I mean that the sky was blue, the sun was shining, the snow was glistening and it was -25 Celsius outside.

I heard people complaining about the cold. But listen, we’ve only had 3 days of it! By tomorrow the temperature will be in the single digits and by next week we will be basking in temperatures up above zero.

This has been an easy winter so far; let’s not complain about a few really cold days. You see, the good thing is that we know what cold is like and we have appropriate clothing in our closets to keep us warm through it all.

We don’t need to stay indoors and huddle under blanks while we bemoan the fact that it’s freezing outside.

Let’s just be Canadians and keep going. Let’s act like nothing is special about this weather.

After all, with the memories of the last two winters still fresh in our minds, we’ve got to be smiling from ear to ear every morning when we get out of bed.

I shovelled more snow in one week last year than I have in total so far this season.

I realize that this can be confusing for some of us. Hey, it even confused the various groundhogs in Canada and the USA. They didn’t agree on whether we will have six more weeks of winter or whether it will wrap up quickly.

The way I look at it, we really haven’t had much of a winter. I’m a little sorry that I put my snow tires on this year because they hardly had any snow to perform on.

Still, there are people who aren’t happy with the first sign of winter … even if that first sign is in the middle of February.

These are the people who stay indoors, and feel that it’s too cold to go outside, knowing full well that they will get into a car and only have to walk a few steps until they’re inside a building again.

No, they would rather stay home and watch the movie, “Frozen” on TV. That way they can get their fill of the cold and ice and never have to leave the warmth of their family room.

Let’s not give in to that mindset. Let’s live and live up to what it means to be Canadian.

We are hardy, adventurous … we’re crazy Canucks!

Here’s the thing: It’s pretty easy to get used to life when it is good. Then when we go through difficult times, we act like we’ve never experienced them before. Life is filled with good and bad,  easy and hard. Trust God in it all. Lean on Him when it is difficult and keep living, not complaining.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you found this winter so far? Leave your comment below.

 

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I’m A Bit Of An Open Book

Have you ever found that being an open book has tripped you up? Well, I have!

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As a pastor, there are times I share things about my life with my congregation that kind of exposes me to their scrutiny.

I wouldn’t say that I reveal everything about myself to my congregation, however, there have been times my wife, Lily, has complained that she finds things out about me in my sermon, along with the congregation.

… Those conversations are a little revealing as well.

Over the years, I would say my congregation knows what I’m like. They know some things that I like, and some things I don’t. They’ve found out about situations I’ve been in.

They know about some of the problems I’ve had. They know some things that make me happy and some things that make me sad.

They also know about things that make me angry, or mad.

And they know about my health. They know I had a heart attack. They know I try to exercise and try to eat the right kinds of foods.

They know my weakness for Dr. Pepper … even though I’ve tried to convince them that it works together with my cholesterol medication.

They know my weakness for junk food and fast food.

When it comes to things like that, I’m a bit of an open book.

As a pastor, it’s not just your family who’s reading you, it’s your whole congregation who’s reading you.

So yesterday I was in a grocery store … pretty innocent – I mean a lot of people go into grocery stores everyday.

It’s just not a good sign when I’m in one. You see, Lily would rather me not go grocery shopping with her. There are too many things that catch my eye and end up in the cart.

And the things that catch my eye are never on her list of things that we need. They are, of course, items that work together with my cholesterol medication.

It’s good that I don’t go in grocery stores that often. They are big places with lots of people strolling, or trolling up and down the aisles.

But that’s where I was yesterday afternoon. Lily was off getting some healthy things down in the produce section … I was in the candy aisle.

And that’s when someone from my congregation spotted me. She paused, cleared her throat, and I looked up.

I was caught! I had already been to the chip aisle so the evidence was in my hands.

What do you say to someone who knows you had a heart attack, that you are trying to live healthier, but they catch you with chips in hand, drooling over a big pack of licorice?

Well, what you do is you play the card you can only play one day a year.

I looked at her, smiled and said, “You’ve got to have junk food for the Super Bowl!”

And that was a good enough answer.

Here’s the thing: Being an open book can trip you up sometimes. But you know, whether you think about it, realize it or not, we are all open books to God. He sees it all, even the things that aren’t seen, like our thought and words. So it’s best to be honest and up front with Him. Don’t pretend He doesn’t see or know. He does. Be quick to confess, and let His awareness of you control your actions, thoughts and words.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you been caught doing lately? Leave your comment below.