Currently I’m on vacation some where near a sandy beach, on Lake Huron. While I am away I am featuring a guest blog about once a week. Today’s blog comes from Dr. Munier Nour who currently lives with his family in Calgary. He and his wife, Mary, have been married for 7 years and have two young sons aged one and three. Munier is a subspecialist in the field of pediatrics. He and his family lived in Kingston and attended KAC until 2010.
I’ve struggled to write this blog entry for a few weeks now. I’ve started writing a few times and have always just thrown it away. I think I’ve wanted a neat and tidy package of a story to tell people. I want to share a story of resolution and pack in a quaint lesson learned. But as much as I’ve tried that’s not a story I can tell… yet. Mine is still a work in progress.
Despite putting this task aside for the last time this morning my confirmation came this evening that I need to articulate my struggle – if for no one else, then for my own benefit. We spent the evening in hospital with our youngest son for the third time in the past few months.
A year ago I had a neat little plan for our family. I had finally finished my ridiculously long medical training, we had our two healthy children, and my dream job was about to become available. It looked like I couldn’t have planned it better. I would quickly interview for the job, get it, we’d move into our new home and life would be in cruise control from there on. I had it all figured out. God had different plans.
In a series of seemingly rapid fire steps all my hard work and planning for a care free life seemed to come undone. It started out with our youngest son getting quite sick and being hospitalized with breathing difficulties when I was on the other side of the country. If narrowly missing an ICU admission wasn’t enough, he went on to repeat the process not two weeks later (and again tonight). Weeks later we were told that he also had another rare issue. It seems he had suffered from a perinatal stroke before he was born, a condition previously called hemiplegic cerebral palsy. While he has only shown mild symptoms it has been very difficult to understand and grasp this as parents wanting nothing but the best for our child. Following these medical events, I received the news that my prospects for work would go to another applicant – leaving me with essentially with no options of work in my field in the entire country.
It’s at this point that I feel the need to say something quaint or cliché. Something like ‘everything happens for a reason’ or ‘God’s got something bigger and better in store’ or ‘God will never give you more than you can handle’. While these are all good intentioned, the fact of the matter is I don’t really want to hear them right now – plus I’m not sure they even necessarily apply.
When I turn to passages like the story of Jesus calming the storm (Mark 4:35-41) my tendency is to look down on the disciples. How could they not realize Jesus was in control? How could they not understand that they were still safe? How could they have so little faith? In the midst of my storm, I wish I could say I was different from them. I feel the rain starting and I run and panic.
As I’ve begun to navigate this small storm – while it is not easy – I am comforted to know I am not alone in this boat and that He commands even the winds and the water.
Question: When the storms come in your life, where do you turn?
When everything is wrong
The day has passed and nothing’s done
And the whole world seems against me
When I’m rolling in my bed, there’s a storm in my head
I’m afraid of sinking in despair.
…
‘Cause I’m a child of little faith
I feel the wind and forget Your grace
And You say, “Peace, be still.”
Teach me, Lord to have faith
In what You’re bringing me will
Change my life and bring You glory
…
There on the storm, teach me God to understand
Of Your will that I just cannot control.
There may I see all Your love protecting me
I thank you Lord, You are the calmer of the storm.
— “Calmer of the Storm” by Downhere
http://youtu.be/Z5gqZHifyQM