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Different Rules Apply

This is a reblog of a post I wrote March 26, 2013

There are different rules around our house when I’m on my own … to be accurate, it was my son and I who were on our own this weekend. Lily was away speaking at a women’s retreat.

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Before she left, she gave us some rules to live by while she was gone. But even as she shared her expectations with us, I knew that when the door shut, a whole different set of rules would kick in.

I listened to her directions and got some tips, like for meals she wanted us to eat the leftovers in the fridge and not spend money on food. However, I made it clear to Mike that the leftovers were for lunches and evening meals would be pizza and wings. … not together, mind you … pizza one night and then wings for the hockey game Saturday night.

I’m sure that as Lily tells us what we should eat, by now she realizes what will really happen. I think it is her eternal, optimistic, pie-in-the-sky hope that maybe we will actually follow her rules that forces her to tell us.

Along with the eating rules, the cleanliness rules go out the window as well. She knows better than to expect us to keep up to her standards. She only expects that when she returns the place will look like it did when she left. Whatever happens between then, she tries very hard not to think about.

Lily has this rule that is etched into her brain that she can’t leave the house or go to bed unless the dishes are all washed and the kitchen is clean. Mike and I don’t share the same etching in our melons! To go a day or two with a sink full of dishes is not a problem. I figure that’s why we bought a set of twelve dishes and not four.

My rule is if you leave it in the sink, put some hot water on it so that when you finally get to washing, the gunk will come off easily. It’s a good rule to follow and over the years it’s saved me a lot of time in the kitchen.

When the kids were little, keeping the place clean was more difficult. There were toys strewn all over that needed to be picked up. But now, it’s a cinch – we don’t make that much of a mess! There’s just a few clothes, crumbs, and clutter that needs to be cleaned and straightened before Lily shows up at the door.

And I know that just before she enters the house she starts imagining what it might look like. She hopes for cleanliness but braces herself for substandard neat and tidy. I know how her mind works. She played a tape in her head of what the house looked like during the weekend just to prepare herself for what she would find.

In the end, disappointment or satisfaction reigns in her, depending on whether she believes we made an effort or not.

Here’s the thing: God’s standard is perfection – something you and I can’t reach. But God has arranged it so we just have to be ready to meet Him when we die or Christ returns. God’s disappointment or satisfaction with us will be based on whether our faith is placed in Christ. And He will be able to tell if it is or not, depending on if we are seeking to please Christ or are not making any effort. Let’s all be ready.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you prepare for an inspection?  Leave your comment below.

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Choose Your Socks Wisely

This is a reblog of a post I wrote on May 21, 2013

They say you never know what a day will bring, but sometimes you can sense a day is going to have a certain theme to it. It would be nice if you could go to a drawer and, like picking out a pair of socks, pick your day’s mood (and, of course, check to make sure there’s no holes in it).

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Some people get up on the wrong side of the bed. Others roll out of bed the wrong way and voila, their day seems to be magically selected for them. Fortunately for me, I usually roll out of bed feeling good about what is ahead for me.

Unfortunately, that feeling doesn’t always last very long. The sock drawer effect happens and I pick out a day of frustration to wear like a ratty, old pair of sweat socks.

That happened to me recently. For the first hour or so (getting up, doing my devotions, showering and having breakfast) everything went well. Then I was informed that I needed to drive my wife somewhere on my way to work.

Sometimes it just takes a little rewriting of the daily script to initiate “a day of interruptions” theme. … Oh, and believe me, that did it! Driving Lily to her destination, I was a little agitated. It detained me from getting down to my planned work.

When I finally got to work, in walked an unplanned, unscheduled, perfect illustration for my “interruptions” day. The man was seeking help but each time he had come the previous week, he had been told to come back as I had been on vacation.

The last time he had been told to phone first before he came in. Instead, he just showed up. He was in need of some financial assistance and though I am not a money lender, as a pastor I am used to trying to help out people in his position.

He needed food and the solution was to get him a grocery store gift card. However, after being put off a few times already, he was not in a mood to be put off again.

As I listened to his story, my heart went out to him. Yes, it would be an interruption for me to stop what I was doing to go buy him a gift card, but I felt that’s what I should do.

Unfortunately, he had a few restrictions. He could not go to the grocery store that was the closest to the church. The next closest did not have a store near where he lived.

That meant this interruption would take even longer. Half way there I remembered I had taken my wallet out of my pocket and it was still on my desk at church, so I turned around and went back.

I got the wallet, drove back to the grocery store, and bought the gift card only to notice that the store was affiliated with a grocery store that was close to the church. I could have purchased the card there and saved half the time!

That’s how my day went, one thing after another … until I got home and changed my socks.

Here’s the thing: You can focus on the frustration of each day and get all agitated inside. OR you can view the events of the day as things God brings your way and deal with them as opportunities to serve Him. Your choice.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is your biggest frustration?  Leave your comment below.

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When You Get Lost in the Change

I get a little lost at this time of year, especially in the evenings. For the past month, there has been hockey on TV pretty much every night.

New old Habit

Often there have been multiple games, extending hockey into the wee hours of the night for us in Ontario. But that has come to an end.

They say it takes 21 days to form a habit, so in the past month, I’ve been in the habit of watching hockey each night.

It didn’t matter if I had a meeting or activity after dinner, when I got home there was always the action, cheers, commentary, and, of course, my red light broadcasting throughout the house that another goal had been scored.

It was comforting; I knew what I would be doing and Lily would know where to find me. I didn’t have to choose between several options or projects when I was home. I was focussed, single-minded. It was a good thing.

… Well, I guess it wasn’t all good. There were some downsides like not being able to follow the conversation Lily was trying to have with me. I found it difficult to look her in the eyes while she was talking when the play-by-play guy was describing how a player just rang one off the post.

All winter I have reserved Saturday night to have a can of Dr. Pepper. It’s pretty much the only time I will drink it. However, with hockey on every night, I had to daily remind myself that it was not Saturday or I’d have been going through a case of pop every week!

But all that has come to an end. I don’t know what to do with myself now, because we are down to only four teams and the games are spread out. I had to watch a repeat of the Canada versus Belarus game the other night and I already knew Canada won 9-0!

I’m finding there is great pressure for me to move away from the TV and find something more productive to do. I keep hearing suggestions and hints of things that could be attended to around the house.

My problem is I don’t have my ready-made excuses to not get at these things. It’s one thing to say, “Sure Lil, I’ll put out the garbage right at the end of the period . . . after Coach’s Corner.”

It doesn’t work any more to say, “Could you repeat that? I didn’t quite hear you” four or five times. Lil knows I’m scamming her.

You see, I just made a habit and now I already have to break it … and that’s why I feel lost right now. My routine is being interrupted; my time must be filled with new things.

I think I just need to be weened off of hockey over a few weeks. And that’s good because the semi’s are on and by the time the Stanley Cup series is done, I think I will be ready to fully embrace golf and mountain biking . . . until hockey starts again in the fall.

Here’s the thing: When a season of life changes or your schedule changes for that matter, it can throw you off from your time spent with God alone. Use these times to refresh your approach to your time with God. Change it up a little. Try to incorporate something that will challenge you and increase your interest and desire to meet with Him.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What disruptions to your routine cause you to feel out-of-sorts? Leave your comment below.

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Embrace Your Difference

It’s amazing how different our bodies work. What’s good for one person may not be good for another.

Recently a friend sent my wife, Lily, a video clip and told her not to let me see it. Of course, Lily couldn’t help but show me the video.

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The video clip showed a lady who was 104 years old telling the interviewer that she drank three glasses of Dr. Pepper a day. She said, “It’s good; it has sugar in it.”

She also told the interviewer that two doctors had told her that drinking that much Dr. Pepper would kill her. But then she said, “Both doctor are dead and I’m still here.”

For this woman, she found an elixir that has kept her going for over 100 years. If I drank that many Dr. Peppers a day the only 100 I would count on would be the pounds I would gain in no time flat!

It’s curious that the same thing can have such drastic differences depending on the person.

Some people can eat fries, pizza, and chicken wings, and never have their cholesterol change one bit. However, if I just look at a picture of wings my cholesterol starts to rise.

Maybe that’s why I eat my wings while watching hockey games. I keep my eyes on the screen and never have to gaze at those delicious little morsels passing over my palette on their way to my arteries.

Our bodies also change over the years so what never was an issue, at some point becomes a problem for us.

In university Lily used to drink coffee by the bucketful. Now caffeine gives her headaches and keeps her awake at night.

When I was younger I could eat anything and in any amount. I might have felt stuffed at the time, but the next day, just like an anaconda that swallowed a rabbit whole, there was no sign any crime had been committed.

Now if I could just stick to eating salad without any dressing, I might be able to keep myself from gaining weight … of course that would still depend on averting my eyes from pictures of wings with Frank’s red hot sauce on them.

I’m happy for that lady who can drink three glasses of Dr. Pepper a day and live to 104, while keeping her school girl figure.

I would like to find the thing I could eat or drink without caution that would keep me going for years and years. My fear, however, is that what would work as my elixir would be brussels sprouts or something along those lines.

It’s not that I haven’t tried to find my elixir, but so far I’ve had to write off liquorice, Mike and Ike’s, and Turkish Delight. I’m still hopeful for dark chocolate with whole almonds.

Almonds are good for cholesterol, you know.

Here’s the thing: There are many voices that will try to tell you how to structure your time with God. When someone finds a way to have a rich and meaningful relationship with God, they believe everyone can have the same kind of relationship if they follow their pattern. There may be points and principles that we can pick up from others on how they spend their time with God, but for the most part, we need to seek a way that works specifically for us. We just don’t all respond to God, or find meaningful interaction with him, in the same way or setting. Find your way to a meaningful relationship with God.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you tried in establishing a rich, meaningful relationship with God? Leave your comment below.

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What’s Truly Amazing About Grace 

This is an edited re-post of a blog I published on May 26, 2012. Enjoy.

Let me give you a little insight into my world. Grace is big in a pastor’s life. Most people think pastors are official grace givers at any event.

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At dinner, about 98 percent of the time (a made up stat), people will look to the pastor to say grace.

At wedding receptions, banquets, barbecues, family gatherings, dinner out with friends, anywhere food is being served, probably the pastor will be asked to say grace.

Sometimes I can see the whole thing unfold.

Just before the meal the host will scan the room.  At this point, I can read their mind: they’re thinking, “Whom can I get to say grace?”

Then they spot me, their eyes get big, the expression on their face changes from concern to relief, a smile appears, and then the head nod that says, “ah yes, the pastor. Why didn’t I think of him before?” Then they make a b-line to me.

Actually, I count it an honour to say grace in public.  A few years ago my old high school celebrated its 50th anniversary (not that I was in high school 50 years ago).

I received a phone call asking if I was planning on attending, and if so, would I say grace at the gala dinner banquet.

Based on their knowledge of me in high school, they would never have asked me, but now that I’m a pastor, saying the grace was a perfect job for me.

There are some people who think the pastor has a corner on grace and not just saying it.  I’ve had many people ask me to put in a good word for them with the “Big Guy”.

There have been times where people have made a comment like, “well, you know, he has God on his side.” I could go on, but you get the idea: people think pastors are grace sayers and grace receivers.

One day after I’d had a heart attack a few years back a neighbour said to me, “You having a heart attack? You have to wonder about that.”

He said it as if he didn’t think bad things happened to pastors, or he was questioning what I did to get God mad at me, like maybe I didn’t have God’s grace on my life.

That bothered me because usually people see pastors as being on the good side of grace. I wanted to say, “Wait a minute!  The fact that I’m still here, standing and breathing is a sign I’m on the good side of grace.”

Grace is an amazing thing. It can be spoken as a thanks to God, it can be used as a name (I have a niece named Grace).  It can be given, as undeserved favour, and it can be withheld as punishment. Grace is pretty versatile.

Here’s the thing: The real amazing thing about grace is that we are ALL on the good side of it.  God sent Jesus, His only son, to us as an instrument of grace.  What we need to do is make sure we have received God’s grace by believing in Jesus and claiming him as Lord … and then, live out our days serving Him, knowing that nothing we have done, said, thought or contributed has any merit towards us being recipients of God’s grace. It is God’s unmerited favour on us.  That is truly amazing!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What ways do you see the grace of God showing up in your life?  Leave a comment below.

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That Bundle Package May Not Be The Best Deal

Have you ever noticed how we like to collect things together? We bundle things together so we can pay one bill a month, or do several things at one place, or wait for one specific time.

bundle and save

Communication companies give better deals if you take their bundle package (TV, internet and phone), instead of getting those services separately or from different companies.

Some lending institutions will advertise to have you bundle all your debt together into one loan.

Some large stores offer everything you could ever want under one roof. You can walk into a Walmart and get your groceries, clothes, have your car fixed, buy your electronics, and pretty much anything else you could think of.

I’m just waiting till they offer overnight packages to customers who would like to stay over in their leisure section in the display tents. You would never have to leave the store! It’s one-stop shopping to the extreme!

There is something about us that likes to bundle and gather things together into a nice, neat package. We like that concept: one stop to do it all.

There’s an expression, “saving it up” that usually comes with an ending. We might say “saving it up for the weekend”.

The rock group, Dire Straits, have a song with the line, “saving it up for Friday night”.

My question is what is he saving, what’s the “it”? In the song, apparently the rhythm guitarist doesn’t play his guitar all week; instead he saves playing it until Friday night.

Maybe when we say we’re saving it for the weekend, we mean that during the week we are going to be all work and no play. We’re saving our play time till the weekend.

I’m not sure if that’s what we think, but the truth is we do it, don’t we? Most people package their fun up for one or two days on the weekend.

We do that with special days, as well.

Yesterday was Mother’s Day … one day out of the year when we are nice to our mothers. We show special kindness to them. We treat them better than we do the rest of the year.

Kids make little crafty things, and try to make breakfast for Mom. In the end, however, it’s more mess for her to clean up.

We buy flowers for our mothers, take them out to dinner, or cook them a meal on the BBQ (Just think guys, if Mother’s Day was in February most of us would be hooped, trying to make a meal for our mother or wife without a BBQ.)

Moms make meals everyday. They do a myriad of things each day of the year for their families from counselling, to helping, making, chauffeuring.

Yet we bundle our thank you up into just one day a year. And don’t get me started about Father’s Day!

We’re good at bundling things together. It makes things more manageable, more neat and tidy, more cost effective. Happy Mother’s Day.

Here’s the thing: The Bible says God is always working. He does so much for us, day in day out; some things we don’t even realize. He sent his son Jesus to die on a cross to pay for our sins, and redeem us for himself. Yet many of us bundle our worship of Him into one day a week, Sunday. Consider unbundling your treatment of God. Instead spread your worship of Him out all week long. God really does deserve more of our time than an hour or so one day a week.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you bundled your worship of God? Leave a comment below.

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How To Judge A Restaurant

There is more to a restaurant than the food. The last couple of weeks, my wife Lily and I have eaten out more than we normally do.

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We’ve eaten out in restaurants from Quebec City to Sauble Beach and I’ll tell you the food that is served has a huge impact on the whole experience.

But almost equally as important as the food is the service. In fact, I would say the service contributes about 50 percent to the eating out adventure.

In our travels, we’ve run the gamut. However, there is a general rule that the finer the restaurant, the better the service. The operative word there is “general”; it’s not always the case, but it is the usual fare.

When fine dining, you have to consider the decor and ambiance, for they are just as crucial to the whole experience as the food and service. … We had an amazing dinner in Old Quebec City that had all the elements working together in perfect harmony.

But we’ve had a couple of less than perfect experiences as well. For instance, the other night we chose to eat out in one of the fabulous restaurants in Sauble Beach. (There are only three.)

In that establishment service was at a minimum. The server took a while to even come by our table to acknowledge our presence in their fine establishment.

While service was at a minimum, water was obviously at a premium because of how long it took our waitress to get it to our table – not to mention that we discovered that water was not refillable … because she never refilled our glasses!

The food was okay for me, but not very good for Lil. And though Lily went on about the food, it was equally the service that made for an unenjoyable time.

When it came time for the bill, we couldn’t get out of the place fast enough. I started the process and received a kick from under the table. A bruise would come about from that kick and it would be in the shape of letters that read, “Don’t give her a good tip.”

I felt those words before I could read them, so I slashed what I normally tip in half.

My daughter once worked in the restaurant business so I know how important tips are to servers. I normally give 20%, but this gal only got 10 from us.

I rarely do that, but she really worked hard at making me feel it was the right thing to do.

In golf they say that putting is half the game. You take the same number of shots to travel a few hundred yards as you do to get the ball to travel 30 feet into the hole.

In the restaurant business it’s the same thing. If you’ve got a great menu but lousy service, it’s not going to appeal to too many people.

We’re now down to frequenting two restaurants in Sauble.

Here’s the thing: There are a lot of people who have prayed to receive Jesus Christ as their saviour, yet their life has not changed very much. They have a hard time identifying how they have grown in Christ. That’s because a decision to follow Christ is not all there is to it. It’s not merely a decision we make; it’s incorporating that decision into everyday living that creates the atmosphere for a changed life – a life that truly has been saved by Christ. Make sure your life embodies what you claim to be true, Jesus as your Lord.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do when you see inconsistencies in your life? Leave your comment below.

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When Something Important Is Kept From You

Have you ever thought that something had been kept from you? You know, when you were little and you caught bits and pieces of a conversation your parents were having?

RoadBlockage

You were dying to know what they were talking about, but you were not permitted to hear the details. They kept them from you.

Have you ever thought God might do that with us from time to time?

… Like when two disciples were walking with Jesus and they didn’t realize it was him until after he left them? The Bible says “then their minds were opened”.

A couple of days ago we came up to our cottage to spend a week. It was still April and this was the first time we were up since we closed the place in the fall.

On arrival everything looked in order. It was nice to see the digs had stood up to the winter and won!

We turned everything back on but when I went to turn on the furnace, because it was still April, and it is Sauble Beach, I got no heat.

The furnace came on; I could hear the roar of the blower. I heard the click of the igniter to fire up the furnace, but all that came out of the ducts was cool air.

I checked everything, the switch, the circuit breaker, the gas. It was all working but still no heat.

I worked for about two hours in the cold; I was chilled and frustrated. I couldn’t think of anything else I could do. It had to be a furnace problem; I would have to call a service guy.

But that would be in the morning, and we needed a way to keep warm that night! I borrowed a space heater from my brother’s cottage, and Lily and I went out for dinner, so that I could get warm.

And just to make sure we were going to be warm enough, we also bought a space heater of our own.

That night we were warm alright – almost too warm. In the middle of the night we had to shed some of the covers that we had piled on the bed.

The next morning when I woke up, I lay in bed and an idea popped into my brain. I think God put it there. I think I was kept from that thought the night before.

As I lay in bed, I remembered that we had put duct tape over the furnace exhaust vents in the fall. I realized there probably was a safety feature on the furnace that wouldn’t allow it to fire up if the vents were blocked.

I jumped out of bed, went outside, took off the tape, came back in and “budda boom, budda bing” the furnace worked like a charm.

I shared the tale with some people who told me that a guy had done the same thing years ago, and almost died of carbon monoxide poisoning! They got him out just in time. Wow! Thanks, God.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we’re blocked from getting what we need. God may have a reason for keeping things from us. Be aware that blockages are possible, and when you’re frustrated, seek God. Determine to obey Him and ask Him to reveal what the blockage is and how to remove it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: When was the last time you felt frustrated and blocked from something you needed? Leave your comment below.

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Old Friends Don’t Get Old

Old friends never get old. Well, I guess they do get older, but it’s never old being with them again.

Memory Lane

When you’re with old friends, you talk about things that happened a long time ago and you remember them as if they just happened. You relive the past in the present time.

There is a sense that time stands still when you are with old friends. Even though we don’t have the same physique we once had, and parts of our bodies don’t work as well as they used to, somehow we are able to see ourselves in alter states of say 20 or 30 years in the past.

It’s a curious thing. But much like the size of the fisherman’s catch that got away, our stories seem bigger and better. They amuse and excite others; we get built up in their eyes … or at least our own eyes.

It’s not that it happens all the time. The mood or the atmosphere has to be right to bring back the past in such technicolour, with such glory.

It happened just the other day. Lily and I were with an old friend we went to Bible College with. We’d been watching hockey on TV and I can’t even tell you how the conversation got started.

But one memory connected to another and soon the TV was off (after the game of course), and we were into full-blown nostalgia mode.

You could see it in the eyes and expressions of our kids as they listened on and on to stories they had been part of – tales that were foggy at best in their minds, but were now developing real substance and a vivid image in their newly refined memories.

Some of those stories will be told to their children; some of them will be acted out before their children with a bigger and better feel to them:

… The story of football games in the family room, how I fixed the score before we started, just to create tension and excitement in my kids till they almost burst.

… The stories of back when we were in school, the antics in the dorms that became legendary at the college. It was like we were the heroes of old, the past celebrities recounting life as it was when they were stars.

Those moments create a warm feeling that draws everyone in the room closer together like there is some secret information that they are now privileged to care for … like they’ve been invited into the inner circle.

You just don’t want those times to end; you wish they could continue forever. You want to talk and listen, and continue to light up the eyes of your kids. But you realize that you’re not that age any more. You get tired and can’t pull the all-nighters of the olden days.

You snap back to the reality of the present, and become cognisant that you are thirty pounds heavier, your hair is thinning, and you don’t look anything like the guy in the stories.

But it was great to go back there for a while.

Here’s the thing: You can remember the past, visit the past, make the past seem bigger and better than real life. But you can’t bring the past back to life; you can’t live in the past. So let the past teach you; let it inspire you to live in the present in such a way that you will want to bring colour to this present again. And may God be glorified in those memories.

Question: What were the circumstance that led to your last memory fest? Leave your comments below.

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You Need A Good Navigator In Life

When you get married, one thing you should look for in your spouse is their aptitude for navigation. We all need good navigators in life and when you’re traveling, it’s especially important.

Navigation-car

It’s not easy to figure out if your spouse or spouse-to-be is a good navigator because usually navigating is done in collaboration.

If you’re traveling by car, you both read the signs, and talk about the route and advantages of traveling one way over another. You can actually go for years without really knowing if your spouse is a good navigator.

But when you find yourself in a situation where you don’t speak the language, and can’t read the signs, that’s when you find out what kind of navigating skills your spouse has.

We just got back from a trip to Quebec City and Lily navigated the way; she also can speak a little bit of French.

I have to say, there were times when she let me down. We had to make a few “back around agains” to correct a few navigational mistakes.

There were even a couple of times when she didn’t know what to do, so I just made a turn and miraculously got us going in the right direction.

One quality of a good navigator is their ability to be decisive. My navigator sounded decisive every time she said something. However, she would correct herself several times on every instruction, each time with great authority in her voice.

One time we were on a highway that was dividing. You had to choose: stay left or take the right ramp. It’s always best to be in the middle lane in these situations; that way you have the option of going left or right.

However, with the back and forth decision making, “stay left .  . . no, go right . . . wait, ya I think we should go left”, I felt like I was stick-handling up the ice, trying to deke the defenseman in front of me. … only the defenseman turned out to be several plastic barrels filled with sand or water that were in between the division of the highway.

I narrowly swerved around the lead barrel and took the left passageway, just like my navigator instructed, with mere seconds to spare.

I wiped the sweat from my brow, and only then did she look up from her google maps to see I was on the right road. She completely missed the move I put on those barrels.

There were other times that Lily’s navigating skills got us directly to the place we wanted to go. Every day was a new assignment for her, every trip into Quebec City from our Mont-Sainte-Anne headquarters was a fresh adventure.

All in all, Lily did a great job navigating us in and around Quebec City. If I had to do it all over again, I’d still pick her as my navigator.

Here’s the thing: We all need a good navigator in our lives – not just someone to help us get to a driving destination; we need a navigator for life. It’s best to choose a navigator who can speak the language and preferably has  already been where you want to go. We have that navigator in Jesus Christ, who is more than willing to help us negotiate the most difficult of turns and circumstances we will face along the way in life. Why don’t we consult Him more often? Why don’t we rely on Him all the time? Don’t keep going on your own; turn to Christ to help you navigate your way through this life.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What keeps you from seeking Christ’s help in navigating your life? Leave your comment below.