thoughts

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Why Some Experiences Should Linger

There are experiences that we have that linger and others that don’t.

Around-the-campfire

At our cottage we have a firepit. It doesn’t get used much. In fact, for half of the summer we had our picnic table sitting over it. We don’t even keep a fresh supply of firewood. The wood we have in our bin is a few years old, although I understand that only makes it better for burning.

We only have fires when our kids are around or we have guests with kids. It seems like kids of all ages like to sit by a fire.

I don’t mind sitting by the fire, and at the time I rather enjoy it – unless I have a steady stream of smoke funnelling towards my eyes. I’m not the greatest fire maker, but I’m pretty good at making smoke!

Recently we had a double whammy. Our daughter was up with a friend AND we had friends with kids over who had just moved to the area. There was no getting out of a fire that night.

I was happy someone else made the fire. I just sat down and enjoyed it.

Well, I sort of enjoyed it. When I sat down the smoke was directed right at me, so I had to cover my eyes for the first few minutes. After that everyone else looked kind of blurry because my eyes were still watering.

That’s one reason I don’t like campfires. But the biggest reason I don’t like fires is because afterwards you smell like smoke. You can’t get away from the smell either.

You can change your clothes but your hair still smells smokey. And if you’re a hairy guy or gal, the smoke even hangs on those hairs on your arms and legs (not to mention your back)!

Even washing your hair doesn’t really do the trick. Somehow the fire smell clings on even through the strong scent of Irish Spring soap and Dove shampoo. You come out of the shower feeling clean except for that hint of fire when you turn your head quickly to the right (down wind).

However, there are things about campfires I do like. They’re a real good place to talk. Somehow the fire has this hypnotic effect on people where they stare into the fire and words tumble over their lips … Like that pre-op drug they give you so you can’t keep your mouth shut!

This happens in a greater degree for some than others. The more the coals glow and fire burns, the more of a calming, reflective effect the fire has on people.

In fact, sometimes nothing is said but you’re still communicating. It’s like suddenly you all have mental telepathy; you’ve crossed over to a higher state of consciousness … not really.

Hey, maybe someone should try to bottle this campfire effect! You know, just like they make potato chips with a Canadian maple bacon flavour (how does President’s Choice do that?).

Still, as great as it is, there’s that smell of smoke that lingers that you just can’t shake.

Here’s the thing:  Our time of prayer with God should be like a campfire. When you approach God there should be an easy flow of thoughts back and forth. And when you’re done, there should be a sense of that time lingering … Only you don’t want to wash that sense away; you want to bask in it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How long does the smoke linger on you? You can leave your comment below.

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How To Listen To A Presentation 

As a giver of presentations, I’m not often on the listening end of them. So the other day in church, when I was listening to someone give the message, I found my mind going in lots of directions.

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It’s not easy to listen; it’s difficult to stay engaged with the speaker.

I noticed first off that the message was going to be about light. I knew that because, before the pastor got up to preach, they showed a video about Christ being the light of the world.

The video was good and I wanted to know more about this light show that he was going to talk about. I started looking at the lights on stage and thought it was cool how they could change colour.

But I also noticed how dark the auditorium was and thought they could throw a little more light on the platform.

At the beginning of the message, the pastor read the passage and I noticed it was particularly long and filled with a host of possible ideas. I began to wonder how he was going to handle this length of text.

I couldn’t help myself thinking that I would make this passage into a series and preach several sermons from it.

The preacher was doing pretty good – people laughed when he said something funny – but I started getting concerned that he wasn’t talking about light as much as other things.

I wanted him to come back to the light in two ways: I wanted him to step into the light – like a spotlight or something – so I could see him better, and I wanted him to tell me more about the impact of Christ being the light of the world.

I also started to wonder if this message was something that he got on the internet and was re-preaching or if it was something he wrote himself and really believed. I spent a little time trying to tell if he really owned his message.

My seat was at such an angle that I could see people sitting across the auditorium. I looked at them to see if they were listening, day dreaming, bored, or engaged in what he was saying.

I saw a few nods of the head and could tell they agreed with what was being said. But there was this one guy whose nodding looked more like a guy on a hot bus is trying to stay awake after a long day at work!

And while I was thinking about all that, I realized something similar happens to all the people who are listening to me preach every week. . . . It’s a tough job to give a presentation!

Here’s the thing: It’s easy to settle into a presentation and start thinking about all kinds of things related and unrelated to what is being said. It’s easy because you don’t have to apply it to yourself. You don’t have to think deeply and personally about the material. But the idea of a presentation is that it is for your personal benefit. It’s for you, your ministry, your work, or your personal development.

So, though all kinds of thoughts come to distract you, to keep you from applying the message, your job as a presentation listener is to focus on how it has a bearing on you. Keep three questions running through your mind while you listen: 1. What is true here for me? 2. God, what are you saying to me? 3. What am I now going to do with this?

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you stay focussed in a presentation? You can leave your comment below.

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When Silence Isn’t Golden

They say that silence is golden – at least I remember hearing that phrase in a song way back in the sixties. I’m not sure it’s true in every situation.

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In our world we are surrounded by so many sounds that having some peace and quiet can be a real treat for a change.

But there is always noise … It’s early morning as I’m writing this and though it’s peaceful and quiet, there is still the hum of the refrigerator that just came on a few seconds ago, and the tick tock of the battery-operated clock hanging on the wall just a few short feet from me.

Even if I went outside there are birds chirping, leaves rustling, or even the noise of cars travelling down a distant roadway.

There is always some noise, a voice of some kind that breaks our silence. And maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe complete silence would drive us crazy.

We’d be left alone with our thoughts.

I know that when I get in my car, the first thing I do after starting the car is hit the button on the radio to get some music. Some people just like to have noise, music, talking, whatever alway in the background – radio always on; TV on in another room.

Some people just talk . . . and they never stop. That’s good at times for a person like me who doesn’t have too much to say. Even if the person talking isn’t saying anything interesting, at least it serves as white noise to drown out the silence.

But there are times when I like it quiet. There are times I need it quiet. My mind works better when it’s not distracted by noise around me. I can think clearly, focus more singularly. Its golden.

Then other times silence isn’t golden. Like when you are talking and the person you are talking to isn’t responding.

I’ve had that happen to me on the phone. I was telling a friend important information and during my explanation we were cut off. I’m not sure how long I talked for before I realized there was no one even listening to me, but it was a weird feeling. I had to call back and start over.

There are times when I’ve talked to people who can’t talk back. People in the hospital, at times, are unable to respond or even indicate that they hear what you are saying to them. It’s hard to keep talking in those situations.

There are people who, when they get mad, get silent. And you can talk to them until you’re blue, but they don’t say anything in return. That’s got to be tough. It’s certainly not golden.

In these situations, silence doesn’t help or even solve anything. You really have to talk through them. What’s really golden is knowing when to talk and when to be silent.

Here’s the thing: There are times when we talk to God and it’s as though He isn’t listening.  There just seems to be no response from Him at all. You can plead, beg, even cry out in frustration but still nothing from God in return. At those silent times the temptation is to stop talking to God, to bury your thoughts, worries, frustrations, discouragements and leave God alone in silence.

But that doesn’t solve anything. We need to keep talking to God, keep bringing our thoughts, our needs or hopes to Him, for out of that silence, at some point, God will answer. And that will be golden.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How long have you gone in silence with God? Leave your comment below.

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How To Receive Unexpected Gifts

Sometimes you get something unexpected, something you had really wanted but didn’t think you’d get. That happened to me this week.

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One of the signs you’re a pro at the beach is how you get all your paraphernalia to it. We have about a seven minute walk to the lake so we take everything we’re going to need with us in one trip.

In the old days (that would be the days when our children were little), we had lots of stuff to carry.

There are people who park their cars at the beach, and make trips with their coolers, chairs, blankets, umbrellas etc. Then there are those who walk and take very little, like a blanket and a book.

We like to take enough to make us comfortable for a few hours. We’ve tried a few different options over the years, and finally settled on a wagon.

We loaded everything in a big wagon and hauled it down and back each time. It worked really well, except for the person who had to pull it back from the beach (up hill all the way).

However, in the last few years we haven’t really needed the wagon but we have more beach stuff than is easily carried. We needed something in-between.

What we’ve seen work well are those baby trailers you hook up to your bike. If you’re not using them for child transportation, they work great as a wee moving van.

The problem with them is they cost loads of money – enough that it is hard to justify getting one just to take your stuff down to the beach and back.

My brother’s been looking for a used one for a couple of years now. Once he thought he found one at a garage sale but it looked broken so he didn’t bother to get it.

Just minutes later someone else bought it and it actually worked fine. John’s been kicking himself ever since for not investigating it more thoroughly.

But the other week he came across one, and the owner said he could have it – for free! It was just missing one piece, which John ordered online … it was good to go in a week.

And then the other day, John came over to my place with his trailer hooked up to his bike with all his beach stuff in it. It was sitting in our driveway when the guy across the street came over.

He asked if I also wanted a trailer because his son had one they were just going to give away. I jumped at the chance!

It was in great shape, and hooked up to my bike easily. I was now a beach pro! When you ride down to the beach with your little trailer filled with your chairs, your beach umbrella, your drinks, snacks and games, people know you’re experienced . . . that you’ve been beached.

Someday, maybe – many years from now – we may even let a grandchild or two get pulled to the beach in it.

Here’s the thing:  God sometimes surprises us with good gifts we never expected to get. When He does, be quick to recognize the source of the gift, and be thankful.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you received unexpectedly that was from the hand of God? I’d like to hear from you; you can leave a comment below.

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Why You Can’t Practice Your Faith Alone

There are things we were not meant to do alone. In fact, I would say we were created to do certain things together with others.

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Normally, my wife, Lily, and I attend a particular church while on vacation. But this weekend Lily was visiting our daughter, and the church we attend was having a farewell service for their pastor. So I decided I would not attend.

Instead, I streamed a service over the internet. I’ve never done that before because I’m usually preaching a sermon myself. I thought I would see what it was like.

The church I chose is a large church with several thousands in attendance. They also have satellite churches (nineteen of them) in other locations that have live worship music but simulcast the message on a screen.

I’ve attended conferences like this where you watch the speaker on a big screen. Since they want you to interact as if the speaker was there, they encourage you to clap when it’s appropriate, laugh out loud when he tells a joke … that kind of thing.

Basically, they want you to do the opposite of what you do at the movies yet while you’re watching a movie of someone speaking.

It goes against our natural or trained tendency of being silent and just watching the screen.

But this concept reminds me of the 1970’s film “Rocky Horror Picture Show”. I don’t recommend the movie, nor have I seen it myself.

The movie didn’t do well at the box office, but it has become a hugely popular midnight film. People show up dressed in the costumes of the characters, talk back to the screen at appropriate places, act out parts, and even throw toast and rice when applicable.

It’s extremely interactive.

Now I’m not saying that people should throw toast at the stage when they watch a preacher on a screen but there is something to say about the interactivity at church simulcasts.

It’s like watching a recording of a concert at home on your TV as opposed to being at the live event in the arena. You don’t get the interaction of the audience, and you miss the full value of the light show, the bigger than life stage, the whole sights, sounds and smells of the experience.

There is something about being there in person that you just can’t create on a screen.

As far as streaming a service to your computer goes, unless you’re with a group of friends, I don’t recommend it. Even watching the worship is less than exciting, and that’s with having the words to the songs on the screen.

It was a good message but the experience left me with no one to talk to about it; no one else experienced it with me. I was alone with my thoughts.

When it was over I felt … that’s it? Nothing else? Not even a coffee station in the foyer?

It’s always better live and in person.

Here’s the thing: You and I were not created to have a private faith experience with God. We can’t fully experience a relationship with God without others. We were created to interact with God as we engage and participate with others in worship, growth and service to our Maker.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you sensed a need to practice your faith with others? You can leave your comment below.

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What Kind of Waiting Do You Practice?

This morning I’m sitting on my new deck with my new “conversation set” of outdoor furniture, waiting for the sun to fully come up.

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As we were finishing our work on the deck last week, I got the vision of a sitting area where we could be comfortable, like in our living room, but outside.

The problem with this furniture is that it is big and we only have a small car. Enter my brother and his SUV.

I did some calculations on the size of the furniture and the size of the back of his SUV and I figured we could get it all in.

I’m kind of getting used to borrowing vehicles to pick up large items. The other day I had to borrow a friend’s pick up truck to get three sheets of lattice and a 12’ piece of 2X6.

I remember the days of independence when I owned a mini van and could haul just about anything in that. Well it’s a new day and I need my friends now more than ever.

We made the twenty minute trek into the big city with John’s SUV and waited forever for the guy in the Canadian Tire warehouse to confirm they had all the pieces to the set.

It took so long that I imagined they had the chairs stored in one place, the ottoman and love seat somewhere else, and the cushions … well, they must have been stored in random spots throughout the warehouse.

I’m sure the guys in the back didn’t really want to give them up. They probably came in handy in remote sections of the warehouse for some part time employee to catch a few winks before his shift was over.

Well, about twenty minutes later, they had finally gotten all the furniture together in one place. We paid and headed around the back to the warehouse to pick up our load.

It didn’t take long (like about a minute) to realize that my calculations on the size of the furniture and the space in the vehicle was off. This stuff was not going to fit in easily.

About another twenty minutes later, after struggling with and rearranging the furniture several times, we finally got it in to the point where the back of the SUV was mostly closed.

There was no rope or twine to be found in the warehouse but they had some plastic string-like substance that we kind of doubted would work … but amazingly it held up very well for the last twenty minutes of our adventure back to the cottage.

It only took about five minutes to unload and set up the furniture … and it will take the next ten years or so to fully enjoy our new outdoor living furniture.

Here’s the thing: When I think of my experience purchasing this furniture, I think of how impatient I am with God and my requests. I don’t really like the twenty minute waits (figuratively speaking) here and there. I want my answers right now. I want to place my order with God like I would at Canadian Tire or McDonald’s and have my order answered in about the time it takes to process my debit card. But God isn’t a McDonald’s employee and He doesn’t take orders from us. Our attitude in prayer should be one of respect and patiently waiting. If God chooses to grant us our request we will have years to enjoy it.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you had to learn patience when seeking a request from God? I’d like to hear from you; you can leave your comment below.

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When Your Vacation Becomes Work

I’m used to a vacation where I spend a lot of time relaxing at the beach under an umbrella or dodging the waves in the water. That’s why this vacation seems to be more like work.

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Hey, who am I kidding? – it is work! We’ve been working on our deck at the cottage for about four days now. We haven’t put a foot on the beach yet, though we looked at it from the window of a restaurant we had dinner in one night.

We haven’t gone for walks down to the beach or walks along the beach. We haven’t even broken out the beach umbrella yet.

It’s been work, work work, scrubbing, scraping, washing, building. For some people who like projects that might sound like fun. But when you fall into bed each night exhausted, with muscles aching, back breaking, it takes just a little of the fun out of it. It’s work!

… We’re done now and the beach is calling.

We’ve had good weather so far – that is, we’ve had good working weather – a good deal of sun but a gentle, cool breeze to keep you moving and not overwhelmed by heat.

Now we need some hot – REAL hot – humid weather to draw me down to the lake like a magnet to a fridge … unless you have one of those stainless steel fridges … but you get what I mean.

Don’t get me wrong, the deck looks great, but I came here for a vacation, not work.

I want to go a day without a drill in my hand or a compound miter saw next to my wife. She does all the cutting, by the way …

Many years ago, I had a couple of incidents of cutting my finger: once with a really toothy saw for about seven stitches, and once with an utility knife for about four stitches. After that the family started taking sharp instruments away from me. I had to prove I would be safe using standard cutlery for a while after that.

I just told that story to my neighbour who wondered why Lily was doing all the sawing. I explained that it’s her mitre saw; I bought it for her.

But hey, let’s get back to the beach! I’m thinking that a nice patch of silky sand will do. I’ll throw up the umbrella by the shore, maybe even sip a little Dr. Pepper. I’ve got a book I’ve been wanting to read and that’s a perfect spot to crack it open on my iPad.

Here’s the thing: Your relationship with God should not seem like work. It’s a relationship not a job. So if you find it work to keep up with God, in terms of time spent with Him or service you do for Him, you need to change things up. You need to focus on making your relationship with God more relational. It might be as simple as how you talk to Him, and what you talk about. That’s where I would start.

That’s Life!

Paul

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How Your Words Carry A Lot Of Weight

I think I may be helping my wife lose her mind. We have more power in what we say than we realize, so we really need to make sure what we say is true and right.

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Recently, Lily and I were getting ready to go on a vacation. There was just one glitch. I had to do some scrambling to get a post-dated pay cheque. But I finally got it and we took off.

Things were going well for the first bit of vacation when I realized it was past pay day. So I said to Lily, “We have to get my cheque in the bank”, and promptly got the reply of “where is it?”

I couldn’t believe she was asking that question because I was positive I had given it to her when I came home. So I told her, “You have it!”

She looked at me with a stunned look and I could almost see the wheels in her brain spinning back and forth trying desperately to remember where she had put the cheque.

Both of our minds were now working overtime trying to figure out where this cheque was. We both started looking in places where we might have put it and even places where there’s no way it would be.

All the time I kept telling Lily, “I gave it to you”. And, to be honest, I only thought I gave it to her but I couldn’t actually remember handing her the cheque.

This mini crisis went on for a while. Lily called our son to see if he had seen it at home. She checked to see if we could get by without it. There was even talks of contingency plans of having it couriered to us.

All the while, I was drumming it into Lily’s mind that I had given her the cheque.

For about twenty minutes this kept up, and I was trying to retrace my steps in my head because I thought maybe I hadn’t given my cheque to Lily … not that I was going to publicly admit that out loud!

As I went through my steps, I picked up a folded piece of paper on the coffee table in our cottage. Although I had looked at this paper before, I had only glanced at it because, of course, I had given my pay to Lily.

This time I unfolded the paper and looked at what was there. Guess what? My pay cheque was inside. It all came back to me how I got the cheque and what I did with it.

At this point, however, Lily blurted out, “No wonder I think I’m losing my mind! It’s you planting thoughts in my head that aren’t true that get me worrying that I’m not able to remember things!”

Now she thinks it’s my secret plan to drive her crazy!

Here’s the thing: It’s not a good thing to lead someone to believe something that’s not true. It’s criminal to lead someone to believe something about God and His Word that’s not true. We need to be very careful when speaking for God that our words are not just hearsay. The answer is to know God’s Word and then be careful using words like “God told me” or “God says”. Make sure it’s really true before you lead someone to believe it.

That’s Life

Paul

Question: Have you led someone to believe something that you later found out was not true? I’d like to here your thoughts; you can leave your comment below.

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How To Manage The Ups And Downs In Life

My golf game the other day resembled life to a large degree. And, like my game, life is filled with ups and downs.

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When I was in my early twenties I played golf every Saturday morning.  It was like clockwork, unless I had a late night the night before and then I sometimes got a few pebbles thrown at my window to nudge me out of bed.

Well, this past Saturday was a blast from the past for me. I had an early 7:05 am tee off time with a couple of buddies.

It’s been years, but I still remembered the quietness of that time of day, and the stillness of the air. The dew was thick on the grass and the sun breaking through the trees created breathtaking patterns of light and shade on the fairways.

That’s a nice picture, isn’t it? Well it stops right about there because, for some reason, I couldn’t hit the golf ball on Saturday.

I started with a 6, and if you don’t know anything about golf, let me tell you, it doesn’t matter if it’s a long hole or short hole, a 6 is never a good score!

I posted another 6 on the next hole, and when I got my third straight 6, I glanced over at the score card my partner was keeping and I could see the pattern. My card read 666 and you know what that’s the sign of!

That’s maybe why I was kind of relieved when I scored – yup, you guessed it – another 6 on the next hole. With four sixes on the first four holes, it was very obvious I was having a terrible round. But at least now no one was going to confuse me for being the devil.

The rest of the front nine holes were up and down – a couple of good holes but also a couple of bad ones.

Then things changed around on the back nine. I don’t really know why; no one gave me a pep talk or anything. I just started to hit the ball better. I parred the next 5 holes in a row.

And if you don’t know anything about golf, that means I got the ball in the hole in the correct number of shots.

I had one little hiccup on the 15th hole but then I parred the next two. That’s seven pars on the back nine. That’s a great score for me, and I would say for most people.

Then came the last hole. I don’t know what happened to me, but I choked. I didn’t get a 6 though – I got a 7! I had such a good back nine but then one hole sunk it.

But you know what? As I stare at my score card now, I can’t wait to try again.

Here’s the thing: Life is sometimes bad – sometimes really bad – but it’s also sometimes very good. Often we can’t explain why it is so, we can only take what we get. We have a tendency to blame God for the bad, and just bask in our own glory during the good.

The Bible says everything comes from the hand of God, so we should be looking to God in the good and the bad. We should be seeking to know Him more in all of life. So whether life is good or bad, we should want to get up each morning and try again.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How have you handled the good and bad in life? I’d really like to hear from you; you can leave your comment below.

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How To Get Things Done

I really dislike times when my mind is bombarded with thoughts of things I need to do or act on. It unearths a stress in me like a volcano stoking up to explode.

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It happens often when I’m getting close to some kind of event or deadline – a time like, let’s say, vacation time, which is coming up very soon for me.

I have a ton of things that are flying through my mind, things I need to get moving on. Some things I wouldn’t have to do if I wasn’t going away. But because I am, and there is a deadline, they get piled onto the list.

It’s only 7:30 in the morning as I am writing this piece, but my mind is whirling with about 10 things I need to be putting some time into today. Now that’s on top of the things I have already scheduled to do today!

If I was to attempt to do all the things on my list, I’m looking at about a 26 hour day. Unfortunately, the guy who invented the clock never made one with more than 24 hours.

And the God who created the world set the earth on a rotation that gives us that same 24 pattern for day and night.

Unless the earth gets slammed hard by meteor or something, I think I’m stuck with the same number of hours in a day that we’ve always had. And that thought isn’t helping my stress; nor is it reducing the number of things I have to spend time on.

Something that helps me when I get like this is an exercise I do to deal individually with each project, to-do item or action, and then break it down.

You have to think of each item individually because, when you stay focussed on all the things you have to do, it is just too overwhelming. The pile of work looks massive; you can’t see your way to the end.

So I list each one. I first single them out. Then I break each one down into bite-sized morsels because each to-do or job can be massive. I break them down into small parts that I can do at one time.

I try not to look at the whole project after that, just the next little bite I need to take to get me closer to eating the whole thing.

Here’s the thing:  We sometimes get asked to pray for many things. But what happens is, when we go to pray, we get overwhelmed with all the requests before us, let alone the things we regularly pray for and our own personal needs. It looks like too massive a list and it’s hard to remember them all.

First, don’t try to remember them all; write them down so you can see each request. Then determine how long the request will remain on your list and pray one detail regarding each request for each day it’s on your list.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you pray through the mountain of requests that come to you? I really like to hear from you, so leave a comment below.