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Dreading Another Shopping Trip

Shopping is NOT my favourite sport. I like to do almost anything else rather than shop, unless you count doing work around the house. But for me, shopping for clothes with my wife is in a whole other category.

For starters, shopping – especially in a mall – causes an energy drain in me like nothing else. I can enter a mall standing tall and walking briskly, but after a couple of stores I’m trudging along like a soldier carrying a 40 lb. backpack at the end of a 20 km hike.

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I don’t understand how women can shop for clothes. The options are limitless, and I’m just talking about the stores to choose from. In any given mall there’s an average of three men’s clothing stores, but there are usually over 10 stores carrying women’s garments.

In each store, there are racks and racks of clothes that look very similar with merely a pattern or colour change to them. But it seems most women have to browse each and every rack.

There is something about touching the clothes that women feel they must do. They have to touch almost every piece of clothing in the store. I can tell if I’m going to like something standing five feet from the rack, but women have to grab hold of each piece and look at the front of it … and then the back of it.

I don’t know much about women’s fashion, but if you’re a “winter” don’t even go near the yellow and peach displays. It’s a waste of time.

Women’s clothing stores also crowd their space. There are too many clothes for the square footage. For men, this causes a huge problem. We are left standing in a sea of shirts and skirts and accessories with very little room to walk around.

It’s in women’s stores that you find men holding purses … not because they want to, but because their wives have to try on a third or fourth coat just to make sure that the first three coats that looked the same were the wrong ones.

Why don’t they put chairs in women’s clothing stores, either by the entrance so we can catch our breath before we move on to yet another store, or near the change room so we don’t have to be called over to look at something?

I’ve looked at other men in women’s stores and they all have the same glazed over look in their eyes, like they’ve been hypnotized by bright blues, many shades of red, and green patterns on the blouses – do they still call them blouses or just shirts now?

It should be mandatory to put comfort stations in women’s clothing stores, like a play area for men instead of kids. You can picture it, can’t you? – complete with comfortable chairs, a big screen TV with some game on, complimentary drinks and peanuts while you waited.

I know, that’s called a restaurant … never mind. Hey Lil, I’ll meet you in the sports lounge around the corner when you’re done shopping; here’s your purse back.

Here’s the thing: When I look at my life, the things I do each day, places I go, things I say, God should rolls His eyes and be completely uninterested in my life. But it’s absolutely the opposite! He is interested in every aspect of my life, no matter how many times I do, say and think the same things. God doesn’t get worn out being attentive to my life.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do to stay engaged in an activity that doesn’t naturally interest you?  Leave your comment below.

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The Health Risks of Cheering

For health reasons, maybe the Toronto Maple Leafs shouldn’t make the playoffs more than every nine years. That’s how long it’s been since the last time my stress level went off the scale.

Frankly, I had forgotten what it was like to watch a playoff game in which I really – and I mean really – cared about the outcome. For almost a decade I never really got too excited in the playoffs because I didn’t really care which team won.

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This year is different. I care, and I had forgotten just how much I cared until the series began. Unfortunately, my wife and I decided to take a week’s holiday in the US during the first five games of the playoffs.

The US usually does everything big: their stores are bigger than in Canada; their restaurants serve larger portions; their cities, for the most part, seem larger. But when it comes to hockey, it takes a backseat to basketball and baseball.

To be fair, NBC has done a great job of covering the playoffs so far. Their motto has been “every night, every game” … but not the Leafs! They were on CNBC, whatever that is. All I know is that our hotel room didn’t get that channel and neither did the places we went to look for the games.

By the time we returned to Canada, I had missed the first 4 games of the series, and the fifth game was being played while we were driving home. When we crossed the border, we checked for radio stations that might cover the game.

We finally found one but it was competing with a station that was airing a talk show in another language. I could barely make out that the Leafs scored to make it 2 – 0. I immediately pressed harder on the gas pedal believing that any police officer would understand my urgency to get home.

I got home with 10 minutes left in the game. There was no unloading the car, no unpacking – it was straight to the TV!

I was so stressed for the last half of the period that I couldn’t sit down. I paced back and forth in our family room, watching, holding my breath, screaming at the players on the TV to get the puck out of their end.

I thought I was going to have a heart attack, and I know what that feels like so I had my Nitro ready in my back pocket just in case. Well, we won and that set the stage for game 6.

This time I was home for the whole game. I was able to sit, but there was no talking, no distractions, just rocking back and forth on the edge of my chair. The only calming effect was the pizza and Dr. Pepper.

The Leafs played a great game and won, which brought the series down to one last game in Boston. It was do or die tonight. After a promising 4-1 lead, a loss in overtime has left me a little shaken. If there are no more blogs after this one, you’ll know the Nitro didn’t work.

Here’s the thing: Much of what we get stressed about is over in flash and has no lasting effect on us. Eternity, on the other hand, is something worth stressing over if we are not ready for it … because the effects are forever.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What thing or event causes you the most emotional stress? Leave your comment below.

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Living in the Shadow of Riches

I find the contrast between wealth and poverty difficult to get my head around, especially when they’re found together.

I remember visiting a village in Laos, South East Asia in 1992 that took two hours to get to by boat. When you say, “middle of nowhere” it refers to that little dot on the map. The place had no running water, requiring the women to climb up a hillside to get it from a stream.

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The chief’s home was on stilts and the home’s only furniture was a chest and a few mats. There was a big old pot-bellied pig that lived below the thatch roofed hut.

What I found amazing was, at the time I was there, the chief was in Los Angeles, California visiting his son who was attending university. The thought of a man from that tiny primitive village being in the abundance of LA blew my mind. The contrast seemed to be too extreme.

Being in Atlantic City this week, I saw similar contrasts. But you could miss them all together if you stayed in one of the casinos along the boardwalk. When you stay in a casino resort, you never have to leave the confines of wealth, luxury and beauty.

For that matter, though you are at one of the best beaches in America, you never have to see the light of day – but you certainly can get carpal tunnel from pushing the buttons on the slot machines!

We stayed in a hotel about a 10 minute walk to the strip. On our walks to the world famous Atlantic City boardwalk, we saw some huge contrasts to what we found in the casinos. From the vantage point of our 10th floor balcony, we saw homes that could – and probably should – be torn down, in spitting distance from a casino that cost $2.4 billion to build.

It boggles my mind to see prosperity and dearth coexisting beside each other. How does one live in the shadow of lavishness and how does one ignore impoverishment? There are no simple answers to those questions.

It wouldn’t work to take money from the wealthy; they would still find a way to generate more. Giving money to the poor wouldn’t necessarily mean they would use it to change their situation for any length of time.

This is not something that only exists in Atlantic City. In any city we could name, on any continent on the globe, this same disparity can be found dwelling side by side.

No matter how huge the gulf is, there is something that is consistent: we settle in and get used to living side by side. Though we should seek to do something to change the disparity, instead we shrug and accept it as the way it is.

Here’s the thing: In this life we all live together side by side, those who are bound for heaven and those bound for hell. In heaven one day there will be no co-existing. Those who have placed their faith in Christ, regardless of their wealth or lack of it, will be in heaven, while those who have not will be in hell. Those bound for heaven shouldn’t accept the disparity now, but seek to bring others into faith in Christ.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What contrasts do you see in life that you have a hard time reconciling?  Leave your comment below.

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You Can’t Beat The Real Thing

Though television and the internet have provided us with live images from around the world that we would never see otherwise, what they can’t do is give us a live experience.

Certainly television news tries to give us live experiences of wars and disasters. The commentary of the reporter is always dramatic. They somehow think that showing the same footage over and over and making the same comments seeps into our psyche so it becomes like an experience to us. … but it doesn’t really work.

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My wife, Lily and I took a trip to Atlantic City, for a week’s get away and to relax. No, not to gamble, though there are a plethora of opportunities to do that.

We aren’t even staying in one of the casino hotels. In fact, we are staying at the very end of the famous Atlantic City boardwalk. To be accurate, the boardwalk used to go past our hotel.

About six months ago, a hurricane came through and wiped out the part of the boardwalk that runs in front of our hotel. I’m surprised it didn’t destroy part of the hotel we are staying in as well.

I remember seeing the news reels on TV when the disaster took place, thinking that it was too bad. I even felt sorry for the people who lost homes and for the damage it caused them and the city.

But until yesterday, when my wife and I walked along the shore of the Atlantic Ocean, and saw the remains of the portion of boardwalk that was lost during Hurricane Sandy, I had not experienced it.

It’s not that we experienced the storm, but our experience of being right at the site of the damage is something television and the internet can’t give us. For example, there’s something better about going to a live sporting event than watching it on TV – even though on TV you get replays and commentary and all kinds of extras.

It’s the same with going to a concert or performance of some kind. There is something better about being there live. If you are there, it is an experience. If you’re watching on television, you are only tuning in to it.

There have been major events that were so pivotal that we remember where we were when they happened: when President Kennedy was shot, when Canada beat the Russians in the 1972 hockey summit, or when the twin towers were struck.

The experience was not the actual event in those cases. The experience was with the place, the people and the emotion of where we were at the time.

For instance, I remember being in the library of my high school, with wall-to-wall people watching the game on three little TVs. I remember the place erupting when Henderson scored his goal. I remember everybody hugging and cheering and shouting (yes, shouting in a library) when the buzzer went. I watched the game live but my experience was in my school.

The point is, our experiences are with live events we are present for, not something we see on TV or the internet.

Here’s the thing: We can see something about God, read something about Him, even be with people who have experienced God. But until we personally engage with Him, meet with Him, or have some dealings with Him, we can’t say we have had an experience with God. We have just been looking on

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What event can you remember in detail as to where you were and who you were with?  Leave your comment below.

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What To Do When The Unexpected Happens

Since my wife was away on the weekend, it was just my 22 year-old son and me at home. More accurately, it was like I was home on the weekend and Mike dropped in and out from time to time.

He wasn’t home for dinner on Friday night so I just had some leftovers. Lily usually leaves me with a fridge full of leftovers, not so much to help with meal preparation but to keep me from spending money at restaurants when she’s way.

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On Saturday morning, I made my regular breakfast of hot oat bran cereal and some fruit. At noon it was still pretty quiet in Mike’s room, so I just had more leftovers for lunch (that my wife had so nicely packaged in plastic containers for us).

Midway through the afternoon, a scary looking creature emerged from his downstairs bedroom. He had worked until 4 am, so 3 in the afternoon was like a “brand new day” for him (check out my blog, “From Plans to Reality”).

There had been an accumulation of dishes in the sink from the past three meals, so I thought I would just clean them up and start fresh at dinner. Besides, I knew that dinner on Saturday night was going to be take out, so few dishes required.

By now, Lily knows that no matter how many leftover meals she puts in the fridge for me, there is a 100% chance that I will be purchasing at least one meal on a weekend. For Saturday dinner, it was a unanimous decision: hot wings from our favourite chicken wing joint.

Three pounds of chicken wings with Frank’s Red Hot sauce … mmmm, I could eat them several times a week. It’s a good thing I have a wife who exerts a little concern for my health and our budget!

Not many dishes for that meal – just a couple of plates, a couple of glasses and we threw the cardboard container in the garbage . . . I mean, the recycling bin.

By the time Sunday morning rolled around, there weren’t too many dishes in the sink. But still, I thought I would just clean them up before I headed out the door to church. By that point in the weekend Mike had been home for one meal and used only one plate and a glass.

When church was over, I thought if Mike was awake, I’d bring home some food for a late lunch. I texted him, and to my surprise he was up and was heading out the door; he didn’t need lunch. So I just came right home.

And that’s when my perfect weekend exploded! The kitchen was a disaster and the sink was full with a bowl, pot, plate, three spoons, a few glasses, an empty container of yogurt or something, and a blender container and parts.

How do you use three spoons in one meal? I thought I was coming home to a clean kitchen and in one meal, my son blew the place up!  Now I know how my wife feels every week!

Here’s the thing: You can be living a pretty clear life before God, pleasing Him with your words, thoughts and deeds. And then out of nowhere, you sin and it seems like you have blown everything with God. When you find an explosion in the kitchen, you just wash the dishes and carry on. When you sin, you do the same – repent to God and carry on.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What kind of messes get you upset the most? Leave your comment below.

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Guaranteed to Cure the Common Cold

If you want to know how to get over a cold really quickly, I have the secret remedy. You may have to buy hundreds of dollars worth of hockey equipment to do it, but I swear by this method. I’ve been doing this for years and the results speak for themselves.

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The other day I woke up with not the beginnings of a cold, or even the sniffles. I woke up with a full-blown, about a 2 days in cold, without any prior symptoms. I have no explanation for it other than it’s my wife’s fault. She must have given it to me.

There is a slight possibility that my late nights this past week have weakened my immune system, but I really think it was Lily who gave me this cold. She may not have had any symptoms herself, but I think she’s sometimes a carrier for these types of germs.

So there I was, sneezing every fifteen minutes, blowing my nose every ten minutes and coughing in between. My body was a little achy but I was more chilled than anything. I even hauled out my Grandma afghan, and when I do that, I’m sick!

I tried to get a good night’s sleep but I tossed and turned all night. I woke up the next morning not feeling any better. Mind you, my alarm went off at 5:30 a.m. and NO ONE feels at the top of their game at that hour!

I had a decision to make: roll over and go back to sleep, or drag my achy, chilled, sorry-looking body out of bed for hockey. It was a quick decision I made – I had to! If I thought about it for even a few seconds, I would have pulled the covers up over my head.

I had gotten out my hockey equipment the night before, just in case. But if I was going to play, I needed something else: the secret remedy/weapon to blasting a cold out of your system. I needed a sweatshirt, the thicker the better.

This remedy involves all my regular hockey equipment, but I wear a t-shirt AND a sweatshirt under my hockey sweater. This allows me to – how can I put this delicately? – sweat like a pig. Oh, I sweat when I play hockey, but with the extra layers, I get to the point of overheating and that’s the condition you need to be in to gain the desired results.

Just to make sure my method was going to work, the group that was coming on the ice after us needed a few extra bodies. I decided to stick around and keep the perspiration flowing.

When I was all done, I was pretty tired. By the time I changed and showered, I was feeling achy and chilly again. So I came home and jumped into bed for a couple of hours. When I got up, voila! I was better! – aches gone, chills gone, the need to blow my nose … well, I’m still going through Kleenex at a rapid rate, but I feel better.

Here’s the thing: For many of the requests we have of God, we just pray. It might be a nice, calm, logical prayer of what we want or need from God. But there are some things that require us to sweat it out with God, to get on our knees and pour out our hearts and souls to Him. That’s the tough work of prayer. You shouldn’t neglect that kind of prayer.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Have you found yourself in need of sweating out your prayer with God?  Leave your comment below.

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We Need To Connect

Something has changed in my family that I’m not really excited about. There are a host of changes I have been thrilled about over the years, like being done with diapers, and driving the kids everywhere, whenever. But this new change doesn’t thrill me.

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The other day was my wife’s birthday (not the change I’m referring to) and she received the usual greetings via the telephone from family members who live out of town. If you answer the phone when these calls come in, you know they just want to talk to the birthday girl, so you try to quickly pass the handset off to her.

But when our daughter calls, usually we all get into the conversation a little bit. It’s like we are all together again as a family. There have been some years when our daughter (who has been out west for six years) has video chatted during birthdays: we have set a laptop in her normal place at the table and then met as a family for birthday dinner.

That didn’t happen this year. I didn’t even talk to my daughter on my wife’s birthday.  It was like she wasn’t part of our birthday celebrations; she just had an insider conversation with her mom.

It’s partly my fault. I should have told Karlie what our plans were for the day and then had her join us for part of it. I missed not having another voice to tease my wife. When the three of us gang up on Lily, it’s even better than when just my son and I do it!

Maybe this is just a change that’s inevitable and there is nothing we can do about it. Maybe it happened because my daughter used up her data plan in the first two weeks of the month and is now internetless (new word) until the first week of May.

At any rate, Karlie was missing from the celebration this year … and that’s a change I don’t really like. I’ve noticed that changes in the family just seem to happen. You don’t really anticipate them; they just sort of slide in on you and you deal with them.

… Like when your son decides to move in with some buddies downtown for the summer. You don’t preplan to turn his room into a home gym because he may be back by the fall.  But when the room is empty for a while, the thought crosses your mind for a second … or two.

To be honest, I like change. I’ve enjoyed watching my kids grow up, face new challenges, and transform before my eyes into full fledged adults (mostly). But for some reason, I like my family to remain the same around special occasions.

Maybe that’s weird; maybe that’s trying to hold on to something that keeps the family members from truly becoming their own individuals. But to me, it seems with the technology we have today, if we used it to maintain family gatherings, it could keep the family closer.

Here’s the thing: We are able to travel great distances at a moment’s notice. And that can take us away from the special occasion of meeting with God’s family at church on Sundays. We can even get used to being away from this special occasion on a regular basis. But we miss out on celebrating with the family when we aren’t present. We have technology to keep us connected. We should make sure we do what we can to remain close to our church family.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How do you remain close to family when you’re not present?  Leave your comment below.

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From Plans To Reality

Some people are big planners; others are not. I don’t happen to be a natural planner. I HAVE to plan and so I do it, but it’s work for me. It takes considerable effort on my part.

In a perfect world, I would wake up every morning and say, “It’s a brand new day!” You have to say it out loud though, and with a Jamaican accent. And one more thing, you really have to roll out the “br” sound. Try it with me: “It’s a brrrrrand new day!” (Don’t forget the Jamaican accent.) … I know you feel better just saying it.

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That’s how I would love to approach each morning: every day a blank page, and me eagerly awaiting what will happen. The only problem with that is I have responsibilities and I have wants and dreams cluttering that wishful blank page.

This morning in my devotions I read Proverbs 16:9 which says, “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.”

That means all that I’ve done in my life so far is really the Lord’s doing. My plans, my dreams and my wants – all the things I’ve gone after – have only come to be because God established them.

That also means the custom platform shoes and knee-length coat with an 8 inch fur collar I bought in the 70‘s was because God established it for me (maybe not, but I really wish I could find a picture of that get up). It means that my plans and dreams that haven’t materialized or worked out are because God didn’t establish them.

I could be sad or angry that I haven’t gotten all I wanted, hoped or planned for, or I could take comfort that I did get what God wanted, planned and dreamed for me so far.

Going on from here, I could stop planning and dreaming, sit back and start each day with “It’s a brand new day” and see what happens, or I could try to figure out what God has planned for me and follow that.

But how can I know God’s plans in advance? And how detailed are God’s plans? Are His plans as detailed as what I will have for breakfast, or whether I should buy a new Apple product – it doesn’t matter what, anything will do. (I’d sure like Him to establish that plan!)

Maybe we can’t live that way. Instead, we have to keep making plans, keep dreaming and hoping but roll with what actually is established. I wonder if most of our frustration is just being upset that God changed our plans on us.

We would be happier if we were prepared for changes to our plans and pleasantly surprised by what He establishes.

Here’s the thing: To live a content life we need to be happy with what God brings our way. We need to be okay when He changes our plans. But we still need to keep planning, dreaming, hoping and wanting. If we stopped, we would probably be dead.

Thanks, Lord for ordering my steps. It’s just what you wanted, so it’s just what I want too.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: How important are the plans you make for yourself?  Leave your comment below.

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The Season I Hate The Most!

When we think of seasons, we think of spring, summer, fall and winter. But there are other seasons too, you know. Some I really look forward to, like golf season, biking season, and hockey season that is nearing an end. Then there are seasons I don’t really like – tax season is one of them.

Seasons all have prevailing weather patterns associated with them. Tax season definitely has a weather pattern: prevailing dark clouds with an 85% chance of rain!

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It starts in January when you get your T4 slip (Canada), charitable receipts etc. You also start to think about making that late RRSP contribution before the end of February deadline.

The information starts to churn in your stomach and nag at the back of your mind, reminding you to get moving on your taxes. There are also constant promptings in the malls, with partitioned booths set up everywhere offering to do your taxes for a fee.

I should be glad for tax time because I get a refund. But the thought of a sunny refund is clouded over by the thought of having to prepare my taxes in the first place. It’s like a clash of high and low pressure fronts creating barometric pressure that would give anyone a headache!

My wife wants me to get someone else to do our taxes, but I don’t like the idea of spending my money, just to get my money back from the government.

I wouldn’t say the CRA (Canada Revenue Agency) picks on me, but about every two years I get a letter asking for more information or they will take some money back. I would think there are other people who make a lot more money than me with possible errors to hunt down.

I have completed my daughter’s taxes for her and she is now experiencing the bright, warm weather of a coming refund … even though Calgary is facing spring snow and cold temperatures.

I’ve got all the paperwork together to do my wife’s and my taxes. I’ve even started to enter in some of the information. There’s just one hitch: my son. He’s keeping the clouds from moving on. I need him to do his taxes before I can complete mine, so I know what I can claim for his education.

So here I sit under an umbrella in my own house, trying to stay dry, trying to put on a happy face in the midst of my depression and looming tax clouds!

I know tax season will be over soon; I know there are sunny days ahead. But I must have a bit of farmer in me. I feel like heading down to the coffee shop to chew the fat with the boys. You know, complain that if it doesn’t stop raining the crops aren’t going to be any good this year.

Hey, I’ll make it through.

Here’s the thing: We can stay in a state of hopelessness because of circumstances or sin. We can complain about it, worry about it, even fuss about it to others as to how we are hard done by. Or we can take our sorry state and do something about it. Take it to God, and allow Him to work on it for you and with you. … Maybe I should take my taxes to H&R Block.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you tend to complain about instead of taking action towards? Leave your comment below.

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King of the Hill

It’s not often that I gawk at an accident. In fact, I purposely try not to slow down too much when I pass one, because it bugs me when people hold up traffic trying to rubber neck and get a good peak at the wreckage.

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But the other day, I was cruising through a parking lot and came across an interesting sight. I chuckled to myself when I saw it, but per my conviction, I kept driving past. Then  I thought, “This is too good to pass up!” so I turned around and parked the car.

This blue SUV was hung up on a mountain of snow. I was already laughing when I got out of the car and started to walk over with my iPhone. I had no intention of calling for help; I wanted a picture!  Do you know how hard it is to get a good picture when you’re laughing?

As I was getting the vehicle in my cross hairs, the woman who was driving the SUV saw me and blurted out, “Oh no! You’re not going to put this on YouTube, are you?” She was embarrassed, which just made me laugh harder, and for a moment I thought I should be taking video rather than still shots.

I circled the site and I wondered how in the world she could have gotten her car on that pile of snow. There was no snow around in any direction. It was the only snow mountain in the parking lot and she found it!  Maybe she wanted to conquer it … which she sort of did.

When I was a kid we used to play “king of the hill” on the huge snow pile the snowplow pushed into the middle of our cul-de-sac. It was always the big guys that could stay up on top the longest. This vehicle was on top and it was staying there, so I guess she won.

I think if she had have called a dealership they may have given her some money for leaving the car there. It looked like it was on one of those fake bolder structures you see at car dealerships. It would create some attention.

After taking 3 or 4 pictures, I had to know how or why she did this. She told me she turned her head to look at a parking spot and drove right up the mountain. But why not stop when you feel the resistance? Or better yet, when you turn down the row, look what’s ahead before looking for a parking spot!

My theory – and it’s only a theory – is that when she hit the snow, she thought, “I can get over this”, and stepped on the gas. It was, after all, a SUV: Sports Utility Vehicle. Don’t they make them for rough and rugged terrain, and … for climbing up snow mountains?

When I left the scene, the tow truck was on its way. About 20 minutes later, I drove by that parking lot again and noticed the snow was still there, but the vehicle was gone, and that woman was no longer king of the hill.

Here’s the thing: There are obstacles we have to deal with in life only because we didn’t pay attention to God warning us to stop, or go around them. If we learn to listen to and heed His guidance, we can avoid some of the mountains we face.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question:  What obstacles have you avoided because you paid attention? Leave your comment below.