Taking that middle ground may be good for keeping the peace but it might also be holding you back.

It’s comfortable being in the middle: in an argument you have friends on both sides; in a hostile environment you have safety on either side of you. 

You are insulated being in the middle. You don’t have to stick up for yourself. 

But in a relationship, being in the middle actually holds you back. 

When I do counselling for couples who are getting married, I have them complete an inventory of their relationship. There are about 150 questions and five responses to choose from for each question. 

The middle response – number three – is indecision. I tell a couple before they do the inventory to try not to pick the middle answer because it’s really a non-answer. I tell them to think about the question and have an opinion. 

The middle is wishy-washy; it’s the lukewarm position … and we know what the Bible says about being lukewarm: Jesus tells a church that they are lukewarm and he is about to spit them out of his mouth (Rev 3:14-20).

Being in the middle in a relationship is not much more than indifference, and it shows you are not really committed.

To be hot or cold you have to commit.  

Mid July is when I first really go into the water by our cottage. We are on Lake Huron and the water is always cold. Even in mid August it is cold – refreshing when it is hot outside, but still cold. 

I rarely run into the water. I always walk slowly into the water until it is over my waist. I go slow to try to acclimatize my body to the water’s temperature. 

But you can’t do it forever. At some point you have to make a decision: Am I going to dive under or go back out? You have to commit one way or the other. 

And in going all in, it is clear you have made a choice; you have some passion. 

It’s also true with hot water. One time I was to do a baptism at church and somehow the hot water heater was left on too long and when I put my foot in the water it was scalding hot. 

From behind the curtain I could hear my senior pastor speaking to the congregation, preparing them for what was to take place in just a few moments.

I had a decision to make. I couldn’t tell the pastor to call it off from where I was. I knew that the water was going to burn and the high school student I was going to baptize was going to have to go all the way under the water. 

I had to make a decision. I couldn’t be lukewarm about it. It was yes or no, do or die. 

Let me just say that I was beat red from my feet to my chest for the next five hours. Poor guy I had to dunk.

Here’s the thing: We can stay in the middle with God, be lukewarm with Him, but that is just taking Him a little bit – just enough of Him for what you need, but not enough to involve Him in much of your life. It’s really indifference to Him so that your life is not totally affected or impacted by God. Being in the middle will hold you back in your relationship with God because you will be indifferent to what He wants for you. God would much rather you be hot or cold with Him. Have some passion, commit yourself to Him and dive into a deep, fulfilling relationship. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What are you indifferent about right now and how will you change that? Leave your comments below.